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my regret as a single lady

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So some days ago, I asked my best friend, ‘’do you think we enjoyed our single years?’’

After she recovered from laughing, she replied, ‘’No, we didn’t. It’s not because we didn’t gyrate but we were busy with relationship issues, carrying burdens that were not ours when we were supposed to be flexing with our income.’’

I laughed, even though she was very right. We went on and on about how we didn’t catch enough fun. Fun in this context means travelling to different places, seeing exciting sights, enjoying friends’ (male and female) company, and all of that.

It’s not about getting drunk and having sex with random guys o, because that’s some people’s idea of fun. Fun without casual sex and alcohol is incomplete these days. I’m not judging anyone, but personally, I don’t think one needs to be wild to be adventurous.

It’s not that we didn’t do what we regret not doing but we didn’t do it enough. We were too careful, we were being too nice in our relationships, and I was wary of forming a relationship with strangers. I was, I still am, an introvert, but towards the end of my single years, I started craving company and desiring to try new things, but I was quite incapacitated by school works.

My friend said she wished she could turn back the hands of the clock. I also wish the same.

Anyways, I’m happy for the beautiful memories I was able to create with family and with the very few friends I had while single- the shopping, the walks, the sleepovers, the visits and all. What if I didn’t have any of those?

Of course, I didn’t rush into marriage. I didn’t even get married when most of my peers were getting married. I pursued my dreams and got myself on the track I wanted to pursue. I fanned my passion into flames and built a platform for myself. I had a life. And that is really helping my married life. I’m building on the foundation that I laid during my single years.

If you are single, don’t mourn your singleness. Enjoy it while it lasts, you are not going to be single forever, except you want to anyway. Get a life. Pursue your dreams. Discover your passion and your talents. Add value to yourself and to others. Build relationships. Have healthy fun. Visit friends. Visit exciting places. Try new things.

You’ll be grateful you did.   

By the way, I still look forward to a ladies’ time-out with my girlfriends, even though we are scattered all over the continents.

I can’t wait. It may take some years. Still, I can’t wait. 

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Friday 19th of April 2019

This!!!! Thank you for this truthful reminder. As the last "unmarried friend" it's easy to get in your feelings. I have to enjoy this me time before I connect with my forever mate. Love this article!

Olubunmi Mabel

Saturday 20th of April 2019

Exactly! Enjoy it. It won't last forever. Thank you for reading.

Akomolede Olajumoke

Thursday 30th of November 2017

#deep. One should enjoy singlehood in a legit way since one can't turn back the hands of time.


Saturday 11th of November 2017

Nurse K shey you will invite me to the ladies time out������

Àbèníadé's world

Saturday 11th of November 2017

I enjoyed my single days, still enjoying it and I'll do till...

Àbèníadé's world

Saturday 11th of November 2017

I enjoyed my single days, still enjoying it and I'll do till...