I’ve heard older women say, ”A woman’s mind is a pit of secrets!”
Well, for the purpose of this post, the secrets I’ll be writing about here are not huge, marriage-breaking betrayals or deep, dark double lives like a woman giving another man’s child to her husband and pretending it’s his.
Those women are cruel, by the way (Yes, I’m judging my gender).
I mean the little things we keep to ourselves, the unspoken truths we choose not to share to protect our husbands, save ourselves from unnecessary drama, or simply because it’s easier that way.
Adulting is hard enough without needing to explain ourselves constantly.
If you are a man reading this, before you start panicking, let me clarify: keeping secrets isn’t always about lying or hiding something terrible.
Sometimes, it’s about preserving peace, avoiding pointless arguments, or maintaining a bit of mystery (which is necessary to keep a man attracted to you).
So, what are the things women don’t always tell their husbands?
And more importantly, why do we keep these secrets?
Keep reading:
10 Secrets Women Keep from Their Husbands (and Why)
1. How Much Things Actually Cost
If my husband knew the real price of my skincare products and hair extensions, he might just pass out.
Women don’t always disclose the actual cost of things, not because we’re trying to be deceptive, but because we know that men just don’t get it, and we want to avoid the inevitable budget lecture.
Men often underestimate the cost of quality items.
In their minds, a good purse costs $50, and lipstick should cost no more than $10.
Meanwhile, the reality is… different.
No, love, a good foundation is NOT $5!
The irony is that these men have their unnecessary expenses too.
How much money has gone into video games, gadgets, items, apps, or tools that are never actually used?
Well, some of the things we buy are worth it because we work hard and deserve nice things without being questioned.
2. That We Secretly Google Things About Them
Oh, you thought we weren’t running background checks before we even got serious?
LMAO.
Most women have Googled their man at some point.
Even after marriage, we’re still secretly researching.
But it’s not always about checking past relationships; we Google things like:
- “Why does my husband breathe so loudly?”
- “How to get your husband to help around the house without nagging?”
- “What does it mean when a man is quiet?”
I mean, that’s what we do on this blog.
We give answers to questions like these.
Why do women secretly google their men?
Because sometimes Google understands men better than men understand themselves.
Also, we are natural investigators.
If he mentions a female co-worker a little too often, trust and believe we already know what she looks like, her job title, and what kind of car she drives.
This isn’t snooping; it’s just data collection.
Knowledge is power, and we like to be informed.
Right, ladies?
3. When We Don’t Like One of His Friends
There’s always that one friend.
That friend your husband adores but who makes you want to scream into a pillow.
But instead of telling him you can’t stand his friend or that he’s a bad influence, we’ll just smile politely, tolerate his presence, and pray that life naturally phases him out while throwing in a few subtle hints.
Because telling a man his friend is trash will only make him defensive.
So instead, we just keep our opinions to ourselves while strategically limiting their hangouts.
Although I speak when I have to.
If a friend is not a good influence on my man and he’s clueless about it, I tell him.
Gotta watch his back.
4. We Low-Key Check Out Other Men
Before any husbands start hyperventilating, this does NOT mean we’re out here cheating or fantasizing about leaving you.
But just because we’re married doesn’t mean we’ve gone blind.
If a handsome man walks by?
Yes, we notice.
If we see an attractive actor in a movie?
We appreciate.
But do we ever admit this to our husbands? Oh, absolutely not.
Or sometimes.
I can’t help it sometimes, and I say it out loud.
And, of course, my man will give me a playful eye roll and tease me about it, but at the end of the day, he knows I’m loyal to him.
But often, women keep their admiration for other men low-key because we know men don’t take this as lightly as we do.
It’s a harmless admiration, not temptation, and we’d rather not have a “Who’s hotter, me or him?” conversation.
Men, just know that you are still the king of our hearts.
But Chris Hemsworth?
We will admire in silence.
5. We Sometimes Fake Sleep to Avoid Doing The Do
I love my husband.
I enjoy intimacy…a lot.
But on some nights, I’m tayad!
After a long day of working, taking care of kids, running errands, and dealing with life’s chaos, by the time night rolls around, the only thing I want is sleep.
But instead of saying, “Babe, I love you, but I have zero energy for this tonight,” we pull out the oldest trick in the book—fake sleep. lol
It’s easier than having the guilt conversation or explaining why we’re not in the mood without making him feel rejected.
And men can be persistent.
They take any slight movement as an invitation.
Even if we’re completely exhausted, if we’re awake, they’ll still try.
But a woman in deep, much-needed “sleep”?
You know better than
6. That We Already Know the Answers When We Ask Certain Questions
I usually tell my husband that when I tell him something or ask him questions, it’s not because I need his advice or opinion.
I already know the answers, but sometimes, it’s nice to just hear them from someone else.
Women rarely ask questions to get information.
No love.
We ask to test reactions, confirm suspicions, or hear you say what we already know. lol
Moral of the story?
Just tell the truth.
We already know.
7. That We Keep a Secret Stash of Snacks
Yes, we love you.
Yes, we enjoy sharing things with you.
But not our favorite snacks.
Every wife has a hidden stash of chocolates, cookies, or chips that she does not disclose to her husband.
Because if we do?
They will disappear within 24 hours.
It’s not selfish; it’s survival.
And sometimes, I just want to have something that’s exclusively mine.
Something that I don’t have to share or feel guilty about indulging in.
Because we women share so much that sometimes, we need something for ourselves.
So husbands, if you ever come across your wife’s secret stash of snacks, turn a blind eye and pretend like you never saw it.
Let her have that little guilty pleasure without feeling judged or having to share it with you.
It’s probably the only thing keeping her sane in this crazy world of marriage and motherhood.
8. That We Sometimes Cry for No Reason
Men don’t understand this, but sometimes, we need a good cry.
Not because we’re sad.
Not because anything is wrong.
Just because.
It’s our way of releasing built-up emotions and stress.
We just need a good cry to feel better again.
So please don’t try to fix it or ask what’s wrong.
Just offer a shoulder to lean on and let us cry it out.
We’ll appreciate your support more than you know.
9. That We Secretly Like When They Get a Little Jealous
We’ll never admit it, but a little bit of jealousy is kind of cute.
Not the possessive, controlling, “Who was that guy? Give me your phone” type.
No, that’s toxic.
But when you guys show just enough jealousy to remind us that you still care?
We secretly love it.
For example, you’re out, and a guy casually compliments you.
You brush it off, but your husband raises an eyebrow, pulls you closer, or gives the guy a “That’s my wife” look.
That tiny display of protectiveness?
Yum!
10. That We Love Them More Than They Know
Men always wonder, “Does she still love me as much as she used to?”
The answer?
More than ever.
Even when we nag.
Even when we roll our eyes.
Even when we pretend not to hear them calling from the other room.
We love them more than they could ever imagine.
It’s just that we don’t always express it in obvious ways.
We show love in small gestures.
When we remind you to take your vitamins, text to check in, cook your favorite meal, give you space to watch the game with your friends, or simply hold your hand while watching TV.
That’s love.
When we fold your clothes the way you like, make sure there’s always toothpaste in the bathroom, and laugh at your corny jokes even when they’re not funny.
That’s love.
I usually ensure my husband has a new toothbrush at least every month.
I make sure he has new sweaters for winter.
I listen to him when he talks about his day, even if I’ve heard the same story a hundred times before.
That’s love.
Men often think love is proven through dramatic gestures, but real love?
It’s in the quiet moments, the everyday care, the sacrifices, the loyalty, and the patience.
So even if we don’t always say it outright, you are loved more than you will ever realize.
And that?
That’s the best secret of all.