Having sex with someone new can be such a heady experience.
Let’s be sincere, you meet a new guy and get talking.
By fate or by design, your conversations get a little spicier.
You build up sexual tension through texts, phone calls, and random dates.
Finally, you ask him to come into the house with you after a date.
Now, a gentleman would surely act like a gentleman and behave themselves, but all men know what’s going to go down.
After the deed is done, the air is thick with excitement, nerves, and that delicious post-intimacy haze.
But while you’re lying there wondering, “Does he like me? Was it good? Is he already planning his escape?” his brain is running its own marathon of thoughts.
As a woman, you might analyze every touch, glance, and word afterward.
But guys?
Their mental state could range from “that was amazing” to post-nut clarity and subtle regret of their actions.
There are so many things that could be going through a man’s mind after having sex with you for the first time.
Let’s pull back the curtains and examine these thoughts.
8 Things A Guy Thinks After You Sleep With Him
1. “Whew! That was incredible, does she think so too?”
Well, this is one thing that most guys think about after an especially good first intimacy experience.
Note that it has to be incredibly good to get this reaction from him.
He replays every moment of the encounter and wonders if you enjoyed it as much as he did.
He may even scrutinize your body language to determine if you truly enjoyed it.
The truth is that when a guy is into you, he wants you to be satisfied, especially when he is also satisfied.
He doesn’t want it to feel like the pleasure is one-sided.
Of course, he may not ask you because it may feel awkward.
And because what would he say if you actually say it wasn’t an incredible experience for you?
Nothing.
So, he doesn’t say anything and just satisfies himself by imagining that you enjoyed it.
2. “Do I stay or leave?”
This could be a dilemma for most guys, especially when they really like you.
They are very concerned about the optics of their actions in the aftermath of an intimate experience.
He is wondering if he should linger or give you space, and wondering what you would think of whatever he chooses to do next.
It is normal for guys to do this.
They don’t know whether you want them to stick around or leave.
Many guys who face this dilemma are usually the ones who haven’t known you much before having sex with you.
And most of them usually end up choosing to leave really early.
So, if you wake up with just memories of what happened and an empty space beside you, it is a sign that he thought about this and decided to leave.
3. “Wait… did I just catch feelings?”
I have always maintained that sex is not a way to make a man love you.
It doesn’t matter how good it was, sex can’t create love.
However, it could be a wake-up call that he actually likes you.
So, most of the time, sex is just sex.
At other times, it could make a man realize that he has feelings for you.
Whatever these feelings may be, they are usually short-lived.
But if you suddenly notice that a guy is suddenly extra attentive to you or texts you the morning after sex, it could be a sign that he is beginning to catch feelings.
Or it could just be a sign that he still wants some more sex.
Either way, don’t expect a man to fall in love with you because he had sex with you.
4. “Please don’t ask me what I am thinking right now.”
This is one thought that almost all men can relate to.
Females usually have the tendency to analyze things that men would rather not even spend much time thinking about.
Because of this, many men dread the silence after sex.
They can guess what is coming after that silence, which is most likely an uncomfortable question they would rather not answer.
Because the honest answer might be: “I am kinda hungry. Does she have any food lying around?”
“Did I lock my car?”
“Can I remember the introduction to the pitch I am supposed to give tomorrow?”
The truth is that men are not always in deep reflection after sex.
Sometimes, their minds may be empty.
At other times, they could be having silly thoughts or thinking about something totally unrelated to the experience they have just had.
5. “I should probably say something sweet… but what?”
Sometimes, men struggle with words.
Especially after sex.
So, immediately after intimacy for the first time, he probably knows that you want to hear something sweet from him.
But he doesn’t know what to say.
So, he may fumble for the right words because he is torn between telling you how amazing the experience was and not wanting to sound like a fanboy.
He may just spend the time quietly or give you a genuine compliment.
You should take it as a win if he does.
Because it means he enjoyed the experience and probably wants to experience it again.
Anyway, you shouldn’t mistake a desire to have more sex with you as a declaration of love.
It is not.
7. “Did I perform okay?”
One day, I came across a post where a lady said that most women don’t even orgasm through sexual intercourse.
I went through the comments and all the ladies agreed with her.
I was shocked because they could have fooled us.
I mean, most guys think they are satisfying their partners sexually.
It was a shocker.
I can imagine that almost every guy who saw that post had performance anxiety the next time they were intimate with their partners.
Performance anxiety can be really crazy.
It’s just like stage fright, only that it is a more private kind of fright.
When I was younger, I used to have stage fright, but it turned out that I was a really good public speaker.
So, they used me for public speaking contests and debates.
I always struggled during the first few seconds of facing an audience, but then I found my flow and eventually forgot about them.
The point I am trying to drive at is that I never felt stage fright after speaking, but it is different with performance anxiety.
It doesn’t vanish after sex.
So, when he is silent after the whole performance, he is low-key waiting for feedback from you.
He wants to know if he did great.
And so, he is silently observing your body language and vibes for signs that you are satisfied.
He also prefers to hear the words.
8. “How do I escape now that I have gotten what I want?”
No matter how much we wish that it wasn’t true, there are many men out there who would pretend to love you just because they want to get between your legs.
These men are mostly playboys who just love the thrill of having new conquests.
A major way of identifying them is by observing how they lovebomb you.
They just come at you so strongly with the intention of sweeping you off your feet and making you more amenable to their charm.
No matter how they hide it, if you are observant enough, you will know that they are just after sex.
Anyway, this type of guy thinks differently from the normal guy after sex.
After sex, he is usually in a celebratory mood and planning how to disappear since he has finally gotten what he wants.
The bottom line is that men think about so many things after having sex with you for the first time.
For some, it is a great experience they want to repeat.
While others are not really into you and are plotting their escape, even just immediately after having sex.
Some are smitten, some are satisfied, and some are just wondering if you will split the Uber.
The key?
Does he reach out?
Plan another date?
Act like nothing happened?
That will tell you all you need to know.