Words are very important.
Especially in relationships.
I think we spend so much time emphasizing why we shouldn’t speak negative words that we have few opportunities to speak about those words that we should speak.
Positive words are really important.
Not just because they uplift the other person, but also because deep down within us, there is a feeling of positivity that comes with uttering positive words.
In intimacy, words are even more important.
During physical intimacy, words can amplify emotions and ignite passions.
Of course, that’s when the right sort of words are uttered.
At other times, words can dampen emotions during intimacy.
Words are like feedback during intimacy.
The wrong sort can make enjoying intimacy difficult.
While much is said about what women want to hear in these moments, let’s flip the script and explore what men crave to hear during physical intimacy.
Here’s an honest guide to the words and phrases that can make a man feel truly seen, desired, and appreciated in those intimate moments.
9 Things A Man Wants To Hear During Physical Intimacy
1. “I want you.”
Let’s start with the most obvious of them all…
“I want you” is a simple and straightforward declaration, yet it is also incredibly powerful.
As a kid who had issues with the girls he liked not liking him back, I suffered.
However, I kept on trying.
If only I could just have been cool enough or athletic enough.
I kept trying until I gave up.
One day, I stood in front of a mirror, imagined my reflection was a really beautiful girl, and then said the words, “I want you.”
It was silly, but I felt so much better about myself.
At that point, I almost believed that was the truth.
My point is that there’s something incredibly beautiful about your husband hearing you express your desire for him.
There are times when even husbands in happy marriages want to know that their wives are genuinely attracted to them, not just fulfilling their duties.
These words have a natural ability to dispel such fears.
It’s not just about being wanted physically.
Rather, it means that you desire your husband as a whole.
You want him sexually, but you also want him in many more ways than that.
It’s a great morale booster, and it makes your husband want you even more.
2. “Don’t stop.”
One thing I have learned is that consent is a continuous thing.
The fact that a lady consents to sex doesn’t mean she can’t change her mind in the middle.
It could be maddening to stop at that point, but you must.
Now, men love to hear the opposite of “stop” when they are being intimate with their wives.
They want to hear “Don’t stop” for several reasons.
One of them is that this phrase is a sign that they are doing something right.
While sex can lead to procreation, it is more than what you just do to give birth to kids.
It is also meant to give pleasure to both partners.
When a wife says, “Don’t stop,” it is usually a sign that she is thoroughly enjoying herself.
It is simple and direct and ensures that the husband knows that he is doing something right.
3. “You feel so good.”
The truth is that sexual intimacy with a wife who is expressive is such a beautiful thing.
I believe I am speaking for most married men when I say that there is a sense of failure that comes when their wives seem to be unexpressive during and after intimacy.
It feels like they didn’t play their part well.
This phrase above is a confidence booster.
Telling your husband that he feels so good is just like telling him that he is giving you so much pleasure and you are enjoying him.
Men really love to hear this kind of feedback.
When you do this, your husband’s enjoyment increases, and he is also able to satisfy you even more.
The truth is that intimacy is a two-way street, and while you may be concerned about enjoying yourself, you should also ensure that your partner is doing the same.
Many men are like this.
They want to give and receive pleasure, and this feedback helps them do even better.
4. “I love how you touch me.”
One time, I saw something shocking on social media.
A lady made a post complaining about how a guy had never gotten her to orgasm, despite her considerable experience with guys.
Now, you may be tempted to say, “It’s just the guys she met,” but I went through the comments, and I realized that most of the women said the same thing.
Things like this usually put men under pressure to satisfy their wives during intimacy.
The pressure to “perform” during intimacy can be really overwhelming for many husbands.
Hearing that they are doing something right could be a really great way to ease the pressure on them.
It is incredibly reassuring when a husband hears his wife moan about how much she loves what he is doing to her.
This not only validates his efforts but also motivates him to keep exploring your body and making you feel pleasure in places you didn’t even know existed on your body.
The key to enjoying intimacy is encouraging your husband to explore.
Otherwise, it could become as routine as any other “task” on Earth.
5. “You are so sexy.”
Approaching a stranger on the street and calling them “sexy” isn’t a compliment.
It’s more like saying that you saw them, and what came to mind was how sexually attractive they are.
However, within the confines of marriage, it is an appropriate compliment for partners.
And while most people think “sexy” refers to hourglass-shaped ladies and muscular guys, the truth is it is appropriate within marriage even if your partner doesn’t fit the conventional description of “sexy”.
Men want to feel attractive, too.
Your husband wants to feel like he is a total catch.
Telling him he’s sexy—whether it’s his body, his voice, or the way he moves—can be a powerful turn-on during intimacy.
But the truth is that it can sometimes be hard to do this, especially when your husband lacks the sculpted figure that people truly classify as sexy.
Even when he lacks the “body of a god”, there are things about him that attract you.
Focus on those things and describe how they draw you to him.
This doesn’t mean you won’t encourage him to take exercise seriously.
However, the reality is that not all men will ever achieve that sculpted physique.
You should learn to look beyond that.
6. “You are amazing.”
When it comes to intimacy with your husband, a little praise goes a long way in ensuring that he remains motivated to satisfy you.
Whether it’s about his skills, his attentiveness, or just the way he makes you feel, hearing that he’s “amazing” can boost his confidence and deepen the connection between you.
So, don’t keep the compliments unspoken.
Tell him how amazing he is, and he will surely be even more amazing towards you.
7. “I love you.”
One time, I saw something really funny.
It was a post that said along the lines of “A man can promise to do anything for you when in the process of attaining orgasm”.
And I believe it is actually true.
Do you know what else I believe?
I believe that when you are out of control with pleasure, you can say things you really wouldn’t have said normally.
Not because you don’t mean them, but because your rational thoughts will contradict you saying them.
For many men, hearing the words “I love you” during intimacy can be incredibly powerful.
It’s not just an affirmation of your feelings for him.
It is also a reminder that what you are sharing isn’t just physical.
It transcends the physical.
It’s an expression of love and commitment.
It’s like saying, “This is special because it’s with you.”
Just like anyone else, men love to know that they have something special going on with their wives.
8. “I’ve been thinking about this all day.”
This is a subtle way of letting him know that you’ve been thinking about him.
It could be said before, during, or after intimacy.
It doesn’t matter when because it is a very potent way of communicating desires.
Men like to know what their wives think of them.
They love the fact that even during the hustle and bustle of the day, they occupy a prominent spot in their wives’ minds.
When it is said before intimacy, it is a way of flirting and communicating desire.
When it is said during intimacy, it is a way to communicate pleasure.
Post intimacy?
It is used to express satisfaction.
Imagine the way your husband would feel when he realizes that he has just fulfilled a day-long fantasy.
Besides all of this, it is a reminder that your desire for him isn’t confined to the bedroom—it is something that lingers, builds, and spills over into everyday life.
9. Tell him exactly what you want him to do.
Most couples usually develop a well-synchronized rhythm when it comes to sexual experiences.
They usually don’t need to communicate before their partner knows what to do next.
However, sometimes, it is important that you tell your partner what to do.
Tell your husband what you want him to do.
Communicate your needs clearly.
Tell him what you want sometimes.
It helps.
This ensures that you derive maximum pleasure from what you are doing.
If you want him to take it slowly, you could whisper the words into his ears.
He may know your needs instinctively, but those words confirm what you want.
In a world that often feels rushed, being able to slow down and savor intimacy is such a blessing.
So, communicate your needs during intimacy as well.
At the end of the day, the things a man wants to hear during physical intimacy aren’t just about stroking his ego.
You don’t need to lie or fabricate things to praise someone just to soothe their ego because the truth is that most men are usually self-aware enough to know when someone is just trying to stroke their ego.
They are also not about bringing the roof of the house down with incoherent moans.
Of course, there is nothing wrong with loud moaning…
Just make sure you are in a soundproof room (for the sake of our precious ears).
They are about building a deeper connection.
Whether it’s words of affirmation, expressions of desire, or declarations of love, what matters most is that they come from a place of authenticity.
So, the next time you are in the moment, don’t be afraid to speak up.
Tell him what you’re feeling, what you’re craving, and what you appreciate about him.
This is what true intimacy is all about.