It’s shocking, I know.
You can sometimes be tempted to feel like you know everything about your husband, especially if you have been married for years.
There’s this tendency to feel like your husband is such an open book.
However, for the most part, it is not always so.
Even in marriage; the most intimate relationship ever, it is impossible to literally know everything about your partner.
You keep on learning by the day.
Although you keep learning more about your husband as the years go by, there are certain basic things every husband wishes their wives knew about them.
A lot of these are so simple that you could have sworn that you knew them, but deep down within, you are probably just consciously learning them.
I have taken the liberty of gathering these things for your benefit.
Come, let’s go through them, together!
9 Important Things Your Husband Wishes You Knew About Him
1. Your husband wants to be loved
I know it may come as a shock to most women who are married to men who seem hard and unexpressive.
But the actual fact is…
Men really desire to be loved and cherished by the people close to them, but they want it most especially from their wives.
However, most men’s societal stereotyping and upbringing make it hard for them to express themselves and show that deep within them, they just want to be loved.
Some people say things like “Men prefer to be respected than loved by their wives”.
That’s untrue.
It is more like a statement that a man can’t have both and hence, must choose.
Listen, men want to be loved as much as they want to be respected.
They don’t want to choose one of the two.
They want both.
They want to eat this particular cake and have it…
And of course, they can if you are ready to give them both.
2. He wants to be respected
There’s a tendency for ladies and women, especially from Africa, to think that respecting your husband is the same as respecting your father.
Well, it’s not!!
If anyone tells you it is, they have a funny idea of marriage.
Your husband is not your father and doesn’t want to be treated like your daddy.
Imagine escaping all the possible zones a woman can put you in and then marrying her only to be Daddy-zoned.
That could be traumatic.
Men want to be respected by their wives… not worshipped.
They want to know that you love and admire them.
They want to see you and know you trust and believe in them.
Being disrespected by his wife is like twisting a knife in the heart of a man.
Note that the kind of respect he wants is not the type Army commanders receive from subordinates or the type that fathers receive from their daughters.
He wants to feel seen, respected and appreciated in the marriage.
And of course, he must be able to reciprocate that respect.
Respect is a two-way street.
Really, men need to respect their wives if they want to continue to be respected.
3. He sometimes feels insecure
In this case, I am not talking about men who have insecurity issues.
I am focused more on those confident, self-assured men who appear like insecurity and self-doubt is the farthest thing from their minds.
Let me give you a sneak peek into their minds…
Sometimes, it is the only thing in their minds.
He can sometimes be scared that he isn’t making the strides he should be making…
Both in work and family life.
He may not express it, but sometimes he feels vulnerable, and during those periods, he needs to hear how much you love and trust him.
He wants to hear you speak about how much you love and respect him.
The same way a woman wants affirmation is the exact same way a man wants it.
Don’t let his hard guy act bamboozle you.
But how do you know when he feels this way if he doesn’t say it?
You see those times he is so quiet and it feels like he is thinking…
Those are the times he worries about life and what could have been working out better.
It is during those periods that he needs reassurance and affirmation for you.
4. He wants you to look good for him
There’s this stage in marriage that women get to and they just get so comfortable.
At that point, they feel like there is no need to look good for their husbands because they are now too familiar with them.
Your husband wants you to look good for him.
Regardless of how many years you have been married, your husband still wants you to put some effort into your dressing.
It’s not like he’s expecting you to look like a supermodel.
He just appreciates the fact that you are making the effort to look good for him.
Resist the urge to always wear large gowns or oversized T-shirts around the house all the time.
I know it’s so comfortable but occasionally, turn the heat up.
Dress nicely in the house for no reason and watch how happy it makes your husband.
5. He wants you to know he can’t fix everything
Due to their upbringing, many men are quite handy around the house.
However, not all men are great at fixing stuff around the house.
For example, I am good at changing lightbulbs and I can tinker around with some electrical appliances.
But I know almost nothing about cars, painting, or plumbing.
There are quite a few men like me out there and one major thing they wish their wives knew is that they can’t fix everything.
They want to be your superhero but sometimes they can be very limited in what they can do.
And it makes them feel emasculated when they disappoint you.
6. He wants you to know he’d rather not choose between his mother and you
Marriage is not a stroll in the park and one of the major issues of marriage could sometimes stem from family members trying to interfere in the marriage.
The mother-in-law versus wife issue is a common problem in marriages.
Some mothers think they should still be the most important woman in their married sons‘ lives and of course, wives feel like they should be the ones occupying that role.
If you are in that situation, your husband wishes you knew that he doesn’t want to have to choose between you and his mother.
However, he also wants you to know that he is ready to defend you whenever you need him to.
He knows you are the most important person in his life, but wishes to avoid the drama that usually comes with mother-in-law and wife issues.
7. He wants you to share in his interests occasionally
The truth is that husbands want their wives to share in their interests from time to time.
He knows you don’t like football but he sometimes wishes that you would watch a football game with him because you know he loves it.
When a man loves you, he wants to share himself with you, including some of his interests.
I remember seeing a tweet by a lady who implied that her husband had to choose between her and watching football.
You shouldn’t have to deliver ultimatums to your husband and make him choose you over a harmless hobby.
In fact, if you want to make your husband happy, watch a game with him occasionally.
It isn’t just limited to sports.
It could also involve seeing a movie or reading a particular book.
It may not be what you love to do but sometimes your husband just wishes you can share in his interests.
8. He loves gifts too
There’s this misconception that men don’t really care about gifts.
This is not true.
Men love gifts and your husband wishes you knew this.
He desires to receive gifts from you.
Regardless of how long you have been married and the cost of the gift, men appreciate the gesture of receiving gifts.
The fact that you give him thoughtful little gifts is a sign of how much you love him.
It’s not only females that love being told “I got this for you because it reminded me of you”.
Men love it too.
9. He wants you to know how much he loves you
Many men suck in their ability to express how much they love their wives but deep within them, they actually do.
One of the major things your husband wishes you knew about him is how much he loves you.
He wants to show you how much he loves you and beyond this, he doesn’t want you to ever doubt how much he loves you.
The things husbands wish their wives know about them are all things that can be expressed to their wives.
Women are not mind readers…
Hence, men should go beyond wishing their wives knew these things about them and start actually expressing them.
Marriage is a great journey when couples understand each other and the first step towards understanding each other is learning to be expressive.