“Help! My husband makes me depressed”
If you are in a situation where you feel depressed because of your husband, you need to know that your mental health matters and should be prioritized.
There are many layers and facets to issues like this.
And while I may not be able to tell exactly how you feel, seeing that I’m not walking in your shoes, I have an idea of what it is like from other people’s experiences.
This is a safe place for you, and I want you to sit back and relax as we walk through this.
We’ll look into some of the nitty-gritty of this situation and the best ways out of it.
Lately, there’s been an increase in awareness of mental health and its importance.
People are now getting more informed about the importance of their minds and how pertinent it is to banish things that make their minds toxic or make them depressed.
There are many possible reasons why your husband may be making you depressed.
10 Possible Reasons Your Husband Makes You Depressed
1. He is toxic
If your husband is toxic and constantly exhibiting unhealthy traits for you, your kids, and your whole family, you can become depressed.
His actions, especially if consistent, can impede your happiness and weary you.
This weariness can progress into depression.
2. He wasn’t your choice
If “my husband makes me depressed” is constantly your complaint, then maybe you don’t love him.
People get into marriage for different reasons and through different routes.
The ideal thing is for both parties to be willing and ready to get married for a marriage to happen.
Unfortunately, sometimes, marriages happen without the active and willing consent of one or both parties.
If you were cajoled or coerced into getting married to your husband, it may be difficult for you to be happy.
In such a case, it is not unusual for your husband to make you depressed.
3. You want out
If you are tired of your marriage and want out, that can cause depression.
A marriage that should be a healthy and happy place can quickly become an unhealthy relationship if you want out.
If you no longer want to stay married to your husband and, for some reason, you are not getting the divorce or separation you want, you may get frustrated and depressed.
4. He wants to leave you
Your husband may be the one that wants out.
When one’s partner is unwilling to stay in the relationship and fix things, it can mentally drain the other.
You desire peace and happiness in your marriage, but your husband just wants a divorce.
Begging him to stay may not be working, and you’re faced with the hard reality that’s confronting you.
This can make you depressed.
5. Clinical depression
An important angle to this is the fact that while you may be saying, “My husband makes me depressed,” your depression may have absolutely nothing to do with your husband.
Depression can be medical, and until you see a medical doctor and get checked before the diagnosis can be made.
You may generally feel sad and depressed every time and think it has something to do with your husband, especially since he’s one of the closest people to you.
But in reality, it may have nothing to do with him at all.
6. He is not supportive
An unsupportive spouse can make you depressed.
If you are married, yet you constantly have to do things alone without the support and motivation from your spouse, you can wear out.
A healthy marriage provides support and help to the individuals in it.
Financial, emotional, psychological, relational, and physical support are all needed, but when they’re constantly lacking, it can induce deep unhappiness or depression.
7. He is abusive
This is sadly the case for many people.
Abuse in marriage is unfortunately common, but it is not to be endured or tolerated.
An abusive husband can make you depressed, but that is not all; he can do a lot more damage to you.
Whether the abuse is physical, emotional, or any other way, you need to understand that your sanity and life are at risk, and you need urgent help.
8. Constant arguments
When women say, “My husband makes me depressed,” this is one of the most common reasons.
Constant fights and disagreements can be draining and mentally exhausting.
Always being on a different page from your husband and getting misunderstood can leave you tired of everything.
9. He cheats
An unfaithful husband can make you depressed.
If he is constantly cheating and stepping out on your marriage, he is opening the doors to unhappiness in your home.
Not only will you be sad at his disrespect and disregard for the marriage you both created, but you will also be concerned about the consequences and risks of his actions.
10. Unhealthy habits
Your husband may, generally speaking, just engage in unhealthy practices that make you unhappy.
His words, lifestyle, decisions, or even choice of friends may not serve you and the marriage, and you will find yourself constantly thinking about it.
If you have spoken with him about it and he continues in his ways, you may get depressed.
“My Husband Makes Me Depressed”: The Way Out
1. Communicate
If you haven’t already tried this, you should.
You may think your husband’s actions are intentional, but they may not be.
I know some men are generally mean, and communication may not do much with them.
But you can not find out if you haven’t tried it.
2. Take yourself away
In the case where communication fails and your marital issues have gotten so bad that they make you feel depressed, I would advise that you find a safe place to go for some time.
You need to put yourself first because you can only fix your marriage or break away from it when you’re sane, safe, and alive.
A safe place can be going to your parents, his parents (depending on your relationship with them), your friends, or finding somewhere peaceful to stay momentarily where you calm yourself down.
You must separate yourself from the situation while thinking of the next step.
3. Speak up
Silence never helps in cases like this.
Keeping things to yourself will do more harm than good.
If you have spoken up to your husband and that didn’t help, you need to speak with someone else about it.
Talk to a trusted loved one who you believe has the discretion to handle private information and bring practical solutions.
Even if they don’t bring solutions, speaking with them will help ease your burden.
4. Seek professional help
I’m not sure how willing your husband would be to see a marriage counselor or therapist with you.
If he is willing to, then you both should explore this option.
But if he isn’t, you need to seek a therapist or counselor for yourself.
Get help for yourself first before thinking about your marriage.
Seeking the help of a therapist will help you heal and regain your mind.
In the case of clinical depression, see a consultant and get help.
Conclusion
Ultimately, if things remain toxic in your marriage, you have to decide if you want to remain in that unhealthy and dangerous place or get a divorce and move on with your life.