We have seen and heard tales of whirlwind romances resulting in happy-ever-afters.
In fact, we grew up watching movies that promoted this impression.
Sadly, reality isn’t always similar to what is projected in the movies, and sometimes, being swept off your feet fast may leave you flat on your back, winded, and weakened by heartbreak.
The funny thing about this kind of situation is how they all start out being perfect.
I have seen this play out several times.
A lady meets a guy who seems so perfect for her.
He’s charming, attentive, and says all the right things.
He’s the kind of guy who texts her good morning and makes her feel like the only person in the room.
But as the days go by, a little voice in her head starts whispering, “Is this too good to be true?”
Well, it is possible that she may have stumbled upon a genuine gem.
However, she may also need to pay attention to the signs that he just may not be as perfect as he seems.
To help this hypothetical lady with her dilemma, I have taken the liberty of curating a list of the telltale signs he is too good to be true.
Let’s get started.
8 Signs He’s Too Good To Be True
1. He acts differently around you
Of course, being in love makes us treat our partners specially.
That’s totally true.
We are kinder, much more caring, and tolerant with our partners than with other people.
So, if he treats other people kindly while he is even kinder with you, you really don’t have a problem.
He isn’t pretending to be someone he is not.
However, it becomes problematic when it feels like your man is a totally different person out there.
He acts differently when he is around others, and sometimes, even when he is around you, you can see that the way he treats other people is very different from how he treats you.
This may make you feel special, but you need to think critically.
The truth is that if a man treats others terribly while treating you like a queen, and you don’t see it as a red flag, then you shouldn’t complain when you’re on the receiving end of his terrible behavior.
Because, trust me, he won’t keep the beast hidden from you forever.
At some point in the future, when he no longer needs to butter you up, he will treat you the way he has treated other people.
One time, my friend was dating this guy.
She used to describe him as a very gentle guy and even use him as an example to me because, according to her, I don’t act like a gentleman.
She had his perspective of him until she saw him lose his temper with a waiter.
The way he spoke to the waiter was so terrible that she was shocked.
Afterward, when she felt his temper had cooled down, she told him that he had overreacted.
Well, nothing could have prepared her for his reaction that night.
He had gotten annoyed at her and chased her out of his house in the middle of the night.
Thankfully, he stayed close to my house, so she spent the night at my place.
The following day, the guy called and begged her, saying all the right things.
When she was about to be swayed, I told her, “You left his place without any physical bruises this time around. Next time may be worse.”
That sealed it for her.
My point is that the best way to determine if a guy is too good to be true is to check his relationship and interactions with others.
If he acts differently around other people, the chances are that he is pretending to be someone else around you.
2. His perfection is over the top
No one is perfect.
Sometimes, I hear people say they are striving for perfection, and it’s usually really weird to me.
That’s mission impossible.
However, admitting that you can’t attain perfection doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be a better version of yourself.
Both are two extremes that can produce no good products.
The balance is that you should always strive for improvement in your life.
It can be so nice to be with a man who seems so perfect for you.
In fact, it may feel like a match made in heaven, but if that guy appears to have no flaws and never seems to make mistakes, it may be a red flag instead of something to rejoice about.
He’s your dream guy, and he’s showing up exactly as you’ve always imagined.
It feels like you may have just molded him yourself to the right specifications.
He’s into the same hobbies and even seems to share the same values as you.
You have never disagreed because it feels like both of you have similar outlooks on life.
But here’s the thing: No one is that perfect, especially in the early stages of a relationship.
Even happily married couples who have been married for years have flaws and conflicts from time to time.
You can’t always agree on everything, and if it seems like he is always in agreement with you, it could be a sign that he is just pretending to be cool with you.
3. He’s rushing the relationship
I know how ladies say they love a guy who knows what he wants and goes for it right from the start.
However, the saying “more haste, less speed” is very applicable in relationships.
This actually means that the more you try to rush things, the slower you are at reaching your target.
If a guy is rushing the relationship and pushing for major commitments too soon, it may be a sign for you to be careful.
He’s talking about moving in together, meeting your family, or even planning a future after just a few dates, and you think he is just being an intentional man?
Well, I think this is a sign that you need to take a step back.
While it might feel flattering and overwhelming that somebody’s son already wants to spend his whole life with you early in the relationship, rushing into commitment could be a mistake.
It takes time to build a healthy relationship.
It doesn’t just happen over a few dates.
It takes plenty of time, and it could be suspicious if he is not ready to be patient.
If he’s pushing for a serious commitment before you’ve had a chance to really get to know each other, it could be a sign that he’s trying to lock you down before you see his true colors.
I have seen several women mention how their husbands changed immediately after marriage, but the truth is they didn’t.
All they are doing is revealing themselves in their authentic form.
So, if you are with a guy who seems perfect and is intent on rushing you into a commitment, you may need to start leading with your head and not your heart in that relationship.
4. He flatters you too much
Compliments are all good.
We all want to be complimented.
However, it may cross the line into flattery many times.
Too much of everything is not good, and sometimes, it indicates a lack of sincerity.
If he constantly showers you with excessive praise, it might be a tactic to lower your defenses.
I know a guy who used to do things like this.
He sees a beautiful lady and vows to add her to his collection of trophy exes.
Then, he walks up to her and starts the chase.
During this period, he makes her feel so special that she is already considering him to be a potential love interest even before he signifies his interest.
After expressing his interest, he doubles down.
Romantic gestures like poems, good morning texts, and thoughtful gifts are a daily occurrence in their lives.
She feels like she has hit the jackpot because he keeps on telling her she is his world and says all those other things guys say to ladies when they are in love.
She can never do any wrong.
In fact, he tells her she is perfect.
Then, when he feels she has taken the bait, he gradually reels her in.
Most of the time, he just wants sex.
So, after his first few lovemaking sessions with her, he shows his true colors and moves on to the next.
This is a very despicable act; sadly, many guys do it for fun.
This is why you should be careful if he flatters you too much.
In my experience, people who flatter you usually have an endgame in mind.
So, they hide their real opinion of you to achieve their purposes.
5. He is too eager to please you
I was talking to a few ladies, and I noticed a trend in their mindset concerning relationships.
So, I asked them what their ideal man is like, and their responses confirmed a theory I have always had about many ladies.
In other words, they all described their ideal man as a man who lives to please them.
According to them, he is a man who must always go out of his way to satisfy them and ensure they have a baby girl’s lifestyle.
The truth is that the average woman thinks a man who is too eager to please them is an ideal man.
I beg to differ.
I know how love can make us do crazy things, but I also understand that men are humans, and no human can be so altruistic that he does everything to please you.
There are times when it won’t be convenient to please you, and a normal man is supposed to express his opinion.
If he doesn’t, it could be a sign of insecurity or a desire to manipulate you in the future.
Ladies, a man can love you and not do everything to please you because the truth is he isn’t perfect, and you aren’t too.
Sometimes, you may not be considering him when you make demands.
It is only right that he tells you what he feels about this.
If he doesn’t, the odds are that he has an endgame in mind.
6. He avoids deep conversations
He’s great at small talk and knows how to keep things light and fun, but every time the conversation turns serious, he changes the subject or brushes it off.
That’s a big red flag.
Ladies are usually so carried away by funny guys that they don’t clock this aberration.
Deep conversations are part of the full package in a romantic relationship.
After all, how will you get to know each other without having meaningful conversations?
If he’s avoiding deeper topics—like his past, his goals, or his feelings—it could be a sign that he’s hiding something.
A healthy relationship requires vulnerability and honesty, so don’t let his charm distract you from the lack of substance.
Sometimes, charming behavior may be hiding terrible behaviors.
And when he feels that there is no need for the charming facade anymore, you may be shocked at what you will find.
In my community, a woman always complains about her husband, but no one believes her because the man is so charming and friendly in public.
I actually believe that she may be going through hell because some of the worst husbands ever are considered to be angels in public.
So, don’t go into any relationship with a man you have little or no details about.
7. There are inconsistencies in his stories
One of the best ways to catch a liar is to look out for inconsistencies in their stories.
In primary school, students always boasted about their parents’ occupations.
It’s funny how even little kids learn classism from a really young age.
Anyway, one of my classmates had previously mentioned that his father was a doctor.
Everyone was wowed because doctors are highly regarded in Nigeria.
At least they were back then.
But to everyone’s shock, the next time the subject came up, he said his father was a pilot.
Then, someone reminded him of what he had said the previous time, and he acted confused.
He had been caught in a terrible lie.
Well, if a guy is flaky and vague with details when he talks to you, it could be a sign of trouble.
This is still true even if he is great in every other aspect.
It gets even worse when it seems like there are inconsistencies in his stories.
It feels like he is just making up the story as he goes.
Pay attention to any inconsistencies in his stories or actions.
If what he says doesn’t match what he has said previously, it is a sign that he’s not being entirely truthful.
Regardless of how perfect he seems, you need to avoid him because he is too good to be true.
8. He is isolating you
He wants to spend all his time with you, and you are flattered.
Wanting to spend all his time with the woman he loves is not a red flag.
The red flag is how he goes about it.
If he is discouraging you from seeing your friends or family, it is a big red flag.
Of course, he doesn’t outrightly tell you to stay away from your family and friends.
He does it subtly.
He might comment that they don’t understand your relationship or that he’s the only one who truly cares about you.
He may try to create a rift between you and your friends by making you fear betrayal.
Regardless of how he tries to do it, isolation is a classic tactic of manipulation.
A healthy partner will encourage your relationships with others, not try to come between them.
So, if he does this, you need to consider running away regardless of how perfect he seems.
It’s easy to get swept up in the excitement of meeting someone who seems too good to be true.
But true love isn’t about perfection—it’s about authenticity, trust, and mutual respect.
If something feels off in your relationship, don’t ignore it.
Take your time, ask questions, and trust your instincts.
Don’t be swept away on a journey that you may later regret.