A good marriage thrives on mutual respect, amongst many other factors.
Marriage blossoms in a climate of love, honor, and respect.
Claiming to love someone while disrespecting them is incredibly untenable.
No one with healthy self-esteem would desire to continue spending their life with a spouse who tramples on their sense of importance.
Yes, this is what disrespecting one’s spouse means.
As a married woman, you owe your husband a healthy dose of respect.
It is easy for people to misinterpret and undervalue respect these days.
You do not lose anything by respecting your husband.
You instead gain his trust, confidence, respect, and love increasingly.
Respect is not fear.
It is due regard for your husband’s feelings, wishes, or rights.
Respect engenders kind words, acknowledgment of wrong, support, recognition and appreciation of efforts, constructive criticism, attention, honesty, fidelity, and so on.
Therefore, the lack of these attributes towards your husband indicates disrespect for him.
For a clearer understanding of what you could do to disrespect your husband, watch out for any of these signs in yourself as a married woman.
12 Signs You Are Disrespecting Your Husband
1. You talk down on him
Using denigrating terms on your husband may be a sign of disrespect.
You should not lash out in anger or utter words that crush his ego.
The ability to disagree respectfully is one attribute a good spouse, in this case, a wife, should not ignore.
Your husband may feel disrespected if you talk to him rudely.
2. You are rude to his friends and family
How you deal with your in-laws indicates how much respect you have for your husband.
As a sign of respect for your husband, you owe him the obligation to be respectful to his friends and family.
You do not even have to like them before you respect them.
Even if your in-laws are difficult, you could devise a means to deal with them respectfully so that they do not end up causing tension between you and your husband.
If they are difficult and do not want to respect you(yes, you also deserve their respect), you may consider avoiding them and keeping them at arm’s length.
Alright, that’s my personal working strategy that helps me avoid drama.
You could try that too.
5. You compare him to other men
Comparing your man to other men could also be regarded as disrespectful.
You didn’t marry other men; you married him.
Comparing him to other men could pass a message of regret to your husband.
This would make him feel like you wish he was like that other man and that you wish you didn’t marry him.
Understandable that we should always strive to be better and learn from others.
However, wisdom is profitable to direct in such instances.
If you observe something in other men and wish your husband could imbibe the same, you do not have to compare him to them.
It suffices to lovingly pitch your idea to him and wait for a change.
The awaited change may or may not come, and you must readily accept the fact that you cannot change anyone except they are willing to change.
You cannot have it all; your husband is unique, and you should accept his uniqueness.
He should not be made to feel insufficient for every new thing you discover in other men.
6. You criticise him in public
There are subtle ways to correct your husband in public if he acts in a way you disapprove of.
Making your disagreement a show for the public might be a dangerous thing to do to your marriage.
You are a team and should always act as one.
Quit putting him down, especially publicly.
Do not be afraid to criticise him when necessary, however, be as private and polite as possible.
You should also avoid excessive criticism.
Let not your criticisms outweigh your commendations.
Such a habit may drain you and rob you of your joy and satisfaction in the marriage.
7. You always use your phone while he talks to you
Technology, if not properly controlled, has a way of affecting our human relationships.
Using your phone while your husband is talking to you could also send a disregarding message to him.
You could be insinuating that you have more important things to attend to and that he is less important.
If you have a pressing matter to attend to, excusing yourself politely should be the graceful thing to do.
8. You undermine his accomplishments
If you undermine his feats, it may suggest to him that you do not respect him.
Celebrating your husband and his wins is one of the many ways to show respect to him.
Do well to commend his efforts, encourage and felicitate with him when he accomplishes something new.
This is because his win is yours, and you should treat it as such.
9. You lie to him
Dishonesty could also be a sign of disrespect in a marriage.
Making a fool of your husband by consistently misrepresenting the truth to him may make him feel disrespected and ruin his trust in you.
This is what assures him that you value and have regard for his feelings.
Transparency seems to be going out of fashion these days, and this is making a sham of numerous marriages.
10. You flirt with other men
Flirting with other men, whether to his knowledge or not, could also be another disrespectful thing to do to your husband.
By flirting with other men, he could sense a threat to fidelity in your marriage.
You may also make him feel less than enough for you.
11. You neglect his needs
It is very important that you prioritise the needs of your husband if you genuinely respect him.
Failure to do so may indicate that you do not care how he fares or would not even care if he was not in your life.
Neglecting his needs shows him how dispensable you consider him.
No one desires to be neglected by the people that mean so much to them.
Marriage would be needless if we didn’t have to look up to our spouse to meet some of our needs.
The needs could be emotional, financial, sexual, and so on.
Even the Bible describes the wife as a help meet for her husband.
12. You do not value his opinion
Your husband’s opinion should matter so much to you.
Seeking his opinion before making significant decisions fosters unity and shows good regard for his feelings and leadership.
This is why it is important to marry someone whose values align with yours because his values and interests will reflect in his perspective on matters.
So, when they give their opinion, you should not shun them or make them feel you can live your life independent of their opinions.
After all, these decisions will eventually affect your marriage and home.
Since you have a mind of your own, you do not always have to agree with his opinions.
In such instances, it’s best to disagree without disrespecting him.
LAST THOUGHTS
The need to be respected is absolutely human.
Everybody craves respect, and an absence of such could cause tension in your marriage.
If you starve your husband of respect, the peace in your marriage could be threatened.
Do not let overfamiliarity liquidate the honour and respect due to him.
Sometimes, respect is defined by what individuals feel makes them feel honored.
This makes it paramount to prioritize communication, so apart from the points mentioned above, you are not disrespecting your husband in other ways and vice versa.