Some time ago, I hung out with some of my friends from church.
At some point, we played a game called “Spin the Bottle.”
I must add that while we asked pretty intimate questions, we didn’t ask those crazy questions that usually accompany such games.
Well, someone asked me a question that got me thinking.
She asked me, ” What is your spec?”.
“Spec” is slang for the kind of woman that attracts me.
They all expected me to say things like “I like tall girls” or “I like fair-complexioned ladies.”
Well, I didn’t say anything like that.
I answered honestly…
I didn’t have a physical spec that attracted me.
I get attracted to ladies because of other attributes.
Well, this got me thinking.
What makes a woman attractive?
Why do some women attract people like they are magnets and people are metal?
More importantly, why do some women drive people away from them even when they don’t want to?
The answer is simple.
We are all products of our habits.
Hence, it is safe to conclude that what makes women attractive are the positive habits they have built over time.
It is even safer to conclude that you could be beautiful, tall, and light-skinned with every other physical attribute men like, and you could still be unattractive if you have negative habits.
If you are wondering what these habits are, you are in the right place.
Come along as we explore the habits that can never be found in attractive women.
Attractive Women Never Have These 9 Habits
1. Rudeness
Growing up, I used to attribute rudeness to females.
That’s because I attended class with some of the rudest females ever.
They were abusive, and I ended up thinking that the majority of females were rude.
Whenever I met one that wasn’t rude, I would be shocked.
Now, I know better.
Rudeness is not specific to any gender.
However, it is an unattractive attribute in any gender.
The danger in rudeness is that most rude people don’t even realize that they are rude.
They think they are being blunt.
I had this issue with one junior at the University.
She kept on saying that she was being a blunt person, but she was actually rude.
Her rudeness affected her so much that she had few friends, and most people were never ready to help her.
Attractive women have learned that there is nothing to be gotten from being rude.
It doesn’t help and definitely doesn’t make you feel better about yourself.
No matter how beautiful you are, if you are a rude person, then you are definitely and decidedly unattractive.
2. Always complaining
Some people always complain…
Regardless of how well something is done, they will always find something to complain about.
It is a terribly unpleasant attitude for anybody…
The problem with ladies who always complain is that they usually don’t see it as their fault.
They usually chalk it down to their extremely high standards and your inability to measure up.
Well, this may be so for some women.
But for many, it’s just the outward manifestation of a very terrible habit.
Let me give you a simple litmus test to check if you have remarkably high standards or just terrible habits.
Introspect deeply and pick out one time someone did something that you didn’t complain about.
Is there any time you didn’t complain about something?
Answer this question honestly.
If your answer is no, you must admit you have an unpleasant habit of complaining.
I am a man, and one of the most annoying things for me is a woman that always complains.
It gets on my nerves so much.
Men find women who complain all the time unattractive.
Nagging has never been a redeeming quality in any gender.
3. Gossiping
I love to gist with friends as much as any other person.
However, I think that there is a fine line between gisting and gossiping.
Many people can’t identify this line and usually don’t know when they crossed it.
Gossiping is a terrible habit that attractive women steer clear of.
Talking about someone negatively not only harms your relationship with the person when they find out, but it also reflects poorly on your character.
You must not forget that women are attractive because of the habits they have developed over the years.
Gossiping is such a bad habit, and anyone who gossips is usually considered to be unpleasant.
This is because you really can’t trust a gossip.
If they can speak about someone else negatively, what is the probability that they are not also talking negatively about you in your absence?
Attractive women prefer to uplift others by speaking kind words to and about them.
This is actually one of the attributes that makes them attractive.
4. Insecurity
I like to think I have a healthy sense of confidence in myself.
In fact, when I was younger, my teachers used to tag me as “overconfident.”
My self confidence, notwithstanding, I will be deceiving myself if I say I don’t have moments of insecurity.
Everyone does.
However, one thing that makes attractive women attractive is that they don’t let their feelings of insecurity dominate their lives.
The validation of the people around them does not define them.
Instead, they work on building a healthy sense of self-worth that makes them even more attractive.
Whenever a woman allows insecurity to dictate her life, it makes her unattractive.
One sure way of pushing away the people who love you is giving in to insecurity attacks.
I had a female friend I used to like very much.
When I really liked her, we weren’t so close.
However, when I got close enough to see how insecure she was, I knew that I had to run for my life.
She made life so difficult for me, always concluding that I didn’t like her.
That’s the thing about insecurity.
It makes you unattractive and drives people away.
5. Dishonesty
Honesty has always been an attractive quality.
When I was a kid, we had this book of poems, and one of the poems was about honesty.
We grew up learning that honesty is the best policy, and one of the major qualities I seek in a woman is honesty.
An honest wife is trustworthy because you know she won’t lie or involve herself in deceitful practices.
Attractive women are those women who have formed the habit of speaking the truth at all times.
They have learned to build trust over time with their transparency.
Let me reiterate that it is the habit that makes the woman attractive.
If a woman is beautiful physically and also very deceitful, the fact that she lies and acts dishonestly makes her grossly unattractive to the people who know her.
Dishonesty may seem great when you lie to escape the consequences of your actions, but it actually makes you unattractive and drives people away.
What’s the gain in being friends with someone you can’t trust?
6. Bailing out on plans
Some women have made it a habit to bail out on plans.
They make plans with you one minute and the very next, they are canceling on you.
I know you may make excuses and say things like, “She lost the vibes” or “Something else came up.”
Well, you can’t always lose your vibes, and something else doesn’t always come up whenever you make plans.
You are simply looking for better ways to package the fact that you have commitment issues.
I have a female friend.
I don’t tell her this often because if I do, she will never let me hear the end of it, but she is very beautiful.
So many guys are usually attracted to her beauty, but she has one issue…
She flakes out on dates!
She could be in a great mood, saying she wants to go out, but when you have arranged the outing, she might say she is tired or something like that.
This isn’t something she does occasionally.
She does it all the time.
It frustrates guys who are interested in her romantically…
It frustrates me…
Because even if we don’t go on dates, sometimes we plan to go somewhere, and she cancels the plans.
For absolutely no reason.
This habit is unattractive.
In fact, you can be attractive to someone until they get a whiff of this habit, and boom, attraction is gone!
7. Laziness
No one likes a lazy person…
Not even another lazy person.
Laziness is a terrible habit, but it is one that many of us battle with.
The urge to sit down and do nothing could be overpowering sometimes.
At the end of the day, remembering everything you must do is usually the key to snapping out of it.
Laziness is not a redeeming quality in a woman…
In anyone, actually.
It makes you wonder how they plan to cope with work/marriage balance.
People may not say this, but marriage is not a stroll in the park.
Every couple must face responsibilities, and each has to shoulder a fair share of them.
Hence, a lazy woman is considered quite unattractive regardless of her physical beauty.
8. Unfriendliness
If love at first sight exists, that’s definitely what I experienced nine years ago.
I was in a new city for the first time in my life, and even though I went with my elder brother, we were both new to the place.
So, we approached a lady to give us directions to where we were going, but she reacted angrily and walked off.
This was disheartening because we didn’t know how to get to our destination.
While we were considering what to do, we saw her.
This lady was/is so beautiful.
I am not even trying to be melodramatic…
Her smile was what you would call a million-dollar smile.
Alright, maybe I am beginning to exaggerate.
We asked her for directions, and she not only knew the place, but she took us there.
She stayed with me till I had done what I had come for, which didn’t take long anyway.
Then she left.
I never got to ask for her phone number because I was still a bumbling young boy.
I saw her two years later, and she remained smiling and friendly.
She also remembered me, which made me feel like a boss.
I didn’t collect her phone number again, in case you are wondering.
The fact is she wasn’t just beautiful; she was also approachable and friendly.
Growing up, that was a rare combo to find.
Dear lady, we know you are beautiful.
However, try to be a little friendly and approachable.
Being mean is not an attractive habit.
I know some guys are pretty terrible and will take your friendliness as a license to be inappropriate.
Put them in their place without letting them touch your “steeze“- a Nigerian slang for someone stylish and attractive.
Smile often, my dear; it helps smoothen wrinkles.
You will not only be more attractive, but you will also look younger and happier.
9. Poor hygiene
I know I said being attractive is not totally physical.
However, dear ladies, practice proper hygiene.
No matter how nicely behaved you are, if you have poor hygiene, you have just undone all your attractiveness.
Attractive ladies know this and thus make it a habit to prioritize self-care over anything.
Take care of yourself.
Brush your teeth twice a day.
Take regular baths.
Use deodorants before going out.
Wear clean clothes.
Keep a clean and well-arranged home.
Make time for activities that rejuvenate you.
Attractiveness is a combination of inner and outer qualities.
By avoiding these negative habits, attractive women enhance their own lives and positively impact those around them.
If you exhibit some of the habits above and want to be attractive, all you need to do is stop!
Stop the negativity.
Stop the poor hygiene.
Stop being lazy.
And embrace positivity, honesty, hard work, and self-care.
That’s all you need to do.
I’m rooting for you!