Marriage can be beautiful, but let’s be honest; it’s not always smooth sailing.
As the popular saying goes, “Marriage is not always a bed of roses.”
Unfortunately, it does not depend on whether you married the right person or not.
No matter who you marry, marriage is not smooth sailing.
However, for those who married the right person – apart from the occasional headbutt due to human’s natural selfishness – you might not have to deal with preventable stress in marriage.
Conversely, your partner can make things more complicated than they need to be, adding fire to the usual stress that comes with marriage.
This is what happens when you are married to a difficult husband.
You need to know when you are because dealing with a difficult husband will often leave you frustrated and emotionally drained.
While nobody is perfect, there’s a big difference between occasional missteps and consistent unhealthy behavior patterns.
Identifying these patterns is essential to finding a solution so you are not subjected to a miserable marriage all your life.
That said, let’s check out these signs.
8 Signs Of A Difficult Husband
1. He Is Overly Critical Of Everything You Do
It is impossible to live together with someone for a while and not see something to complain about.
They are not perfect, after all.
Plus, sometimes, you may have an issue with their way of doing things because it’s different from what you are used to.
So, occasional criticism is not an anomaly in a marriage.
However, if you feel like nothing you do is ever good enough for your husband, you might be dealing with a difficult husband.
A difficult husband often finds fault with everything his wife does, including the littlest things.
You will find him nitpicking over the smallest details, leaving you feeling defeated and questioning yourself.
A problematic man struggles to offer support or encouragement.
Rather, he’s quick to criticize, sometimes even in front of others.
If this sounds familiar, your husband could be a difficult one.
2. He Never Takes Responsibility For His Actions
As I implied earlier, nobody is perfect.
It is impossible to always be free of blame when you and your spouse are fighting or addressing an issue in the home.
The average person recognizes that they could be at fault for an issue, and when they see it, they are quick to apologize.
But a difficult husband rarely owns up to his mistakes.
If something goes wrong, it’s always someone else’s fault – yours, the kids, or even something as ridiculous as the weather.
Of course, you will suffer the brunt of his accusations.
Except when he absolutely cannot, the accusing finger of a problematic husband always points to his wife.
This will make resolving conflicts nearly impossible.
How do you fix a problem when one person refuses to acknowledge it?
Accountability is necessary for a marriage to thrive, but this word is missing from the dictionary of a difficult husband.
3. He Avoids Meaningful Communication
Think about it: when was the last time you had a deep conversation with your husband?
If you can remember, this likely doesn’t relate to you.
But if you cannot, chances are this article is for you.
If he brushes off your attempts to talk about important issues or deflects with humor or anger, you might be dealing with a difficult partner.
Of course, a man avoiding communication does not always mean he is difficult; it could point to other reasons, even though they are still negative.
However, if you have tried to bring up conversations that are vital for the health of your marriage and he is not interested, no matter how politely you approach it, he is likely being difficult.
Meaningful communication cannot be overemphasized in marriage.
Without it, misunderstandings and emotional distance creep in.
An average person in marriage knows this, but a difficult husband doesn’t care.
4. He Is Controlling And Manipulative
A level of control is allowed in marriage.
I know a lot of people associate the word with negative connotations, and I don’t blame them because of how damaging it is when it is abused.
So, I understand that and am willing to acquiesce to using an alternative word, like accountability.
Couples should be accountable to each other and even demand it on some level.
However, they should also enjoy a level of independence, especially on issues that don’t necessarily affect the union, like dressing, friends, work, and so on – to the extent that they don’t affect your marriage.
This will be hard for a difficult spouse, though.
If you are with a demanding husband, it is only a matter of time before you feel like you’re losing pieces of yourself.
Chances are he will dictate what you wear, where you go, who you talk to, and everything you do.
If he finds that you don’t yield as easily, he may guilt-trip you or use manipulation to get his way, making you second-guess your choices and lose your sense of independence.
In this case, of course, it is becoming abusive.
But then again, the chances that a difficult husband is abusive are very high, so it is not surprising that being controlling is one of the signs of a difficult husband.
Remember that being difficult is about making your life hell, so anything goes for such a man.
5. He Constantly Invalidates Your Feelings
A difficult husband often makes you feel you overreact or are too sensitive.
If you’re upset, he might say, “You’re making a big deal out of nothing,” or “Why are you always so emotional?”
Then, he might throw in this thing some men do where they make having emotions wrong, making you feel guilty for having them.
Now, I’m not saying you should be emotional about everything; a proper balance of logic and emotions is vital.
However, emotions are not bad because we are humans, not robots.
But he doesn’t care about all these anyway; what matters for a difficult husband is frustrating you in whatever way he can.
If it is invalidating your feelings, that works at that point, so be it.
6. He Prioritizes His Needs Over Yours
A healthy marriage is a good balance of your way and his way and your needs and his needs.
In a good marriage, nobody’s needs are made to feel more important; that’s why compromising is necessary.
But if you are dealing with a difficult husband, chances are he will put his wants, needs, and opinions above yours.
You will find that he expects you to accommodate him without question, including in decisions about what to eat, where to go, or even how to spend money.
Your desires will never matter in a marriage with a difficult husband.
7. He Is Quick To Anger And Unpredictable
A difficult husband may have a short temper, reacting explosively over minor issues.
This kind of man is stressful to live with because he is unpredictable.
His mood swings can make the household unstable, making everyone anxious and tense.
With a difficult husband, you never know if a small mistake will result in a calm discussion or a heated argument.
You will always be on your toes, walking on eggshells because you are afraid to say the wrong thing or move the wrong way, as anything can trigger him.
If you always feel this tension whereby you are never relaxed and often watchful about everything, you are likely married to a difficult husband.
8. He Gives You The Silent Treatment Frequently
Silent treatment is a common tactic used by difficult husbands to punish or control their partners.
Instead of resolving conflicts, you will find that he stonewalls you, leaving you to deal with the emotional fallout alone.
This behavior is not only immature but also damaging to the relationship.
But a difficult husband doesn’t care about being seen as immature; he is more interested in making life unbearable for you.
And what better way to frustrate you than make you feel you are talking to a wall?
He is also not concerned about damaging the relationship.
If he were, he wouldn’t be difficult.
Instead, if he had an issue with you, he would address it and seek a solution.