The importance of physical intimacy in marriage cannot be overemphasized.
I wrote about:
Creative ways to make the first move
8 tips for more fun physical intimacy
Again, I see the need to write about another three tips that can help you to take physical intimacy to a whole new level in your marriage.
I hope you’ll find them useful as well.
3 Tips to Enhance Physical Intimacy in Your Marriage
1.Communication
Sex is still a topic considered off-limits by a lot of people, even married people, especially religious ones.
I remember attending a mother’s day brunch two years ago, and we were encouraged to ask questions.
Apparently a lot of women had questions about this topic, but they were so reluctant to express themselves.
They used different euphemisms and nouns. Their voices trailed off as they asked their questions.
These are mothers. Majority of them are married, yet, they couldn’t talk about it freely even with fellow women.
How will they teach their children about physical intimacy? This isn’t the age to ignore teaching a child about this topic.
If you want to take intimacy to a new level in your marriage, you’ve got to TALK about it with your spouse.
Talk about everything and anything about it.
Talk about:
. How you like it
. How you want it
. How often you want it
. Things you want to try
. When you want it
. Where you’ll like to have it
. Your fantasies
. How to enjoy it better
. What your spouse does that you love
. What you don’t like about physical intimacy in your marriage
If you don’t talk about it with your spouse, how exactly will you know what both of you have in mind?
Instead of complaining to your friends about how awful physical intimacy is in your marriage, why not talk to the person you’re having it with?
Some women don’t enjoy intimacy because they don’t feel satisfied. Some know how they can but they are not sharing it with their spouses.
They’d rather fake it.
This only creates tension which leads to dissatisfaction.
Communication is vital to the quality of a couple’s sex life.
If you want to enjoy sex, you’ve got to talk about it seriously and playfully.
2. Physical Intimacy challenge
Whether sex is frequent or it has become the last thing on the menu in your marriage, if you want to take things a notch higher, physical intimacy challenge is definitely something to consider.
A friend shared with me how she and her husband had 7 days sex challenge to celebrate their wedding anniversary.
They had it every day for seven days!
For someone who isn’t big on physical intimacy, she confessed that she loved it and that it improved intimacy in every aspect between her and her husband.
Some couples go for 30 days sex challenge. That appears to be too much but if you and your spouse are up for it, go ahead.
Just be free to take a break or skip some days if lose steam or energy.
If 7 days/30 days sex challenge seems to be a lot for you, you can start with 3 days, just to test the waters.
You can also do one week alternate days sex challenge. That means you have it today, you skip it tomorrow, then you have it again the day after tomorrow.
You don’t have to follow the crowd on matters like this. Just settle for what you and your spouse can handle. Your marriage is between you two, not a community project.
So, do whatever works for you.
3. Be open to learning
Sometimes we think we know everything about sex especially if you’ve been having it for years.
You might think you know all there is about this pleasurable wonder, but when you read about it from experts, you might realize you’ve not even scratched the surface.
Be open-minded enough to discover new tips and tricks to make physical intimacy more enjoyable for you and your spouse.
Life is all about constant learning, unlearning, and relearning, including physical intimacy.
So, don’t think you know all there is about this subject matter. Don’t think you don’t need to read books/magazines, listen to experts or visit a therapist to know better.
I hope these tips will help to rekindle things in the bedroom in your marriage.