A lot of things are responsible for people straying from their partners and from the relationships they put in a lot of work to build.
If you’re a woman who doesn’t seem to understand why her husband never compliments her, this write-up is for you.
Why do people suddenly stop caring for their partners?
Why does it seem so easy for them to pull down a beautiful relationship that they took time to build?
Instead of compliments, why do they resort to criticisms as if it’s the new normal all of a sudden?
Can you relate to these?
Are you team “My Husband Never Compliments Me?”
Does your husband make your relationship with him look exactly like the pictures portrayed above?
A major reason why these will even come up in the first place is the feeling of not being appreciated in the relationship any longer.
They’re used to a certain type and dose of appreciation in the relationship and they’re just not getting it anymore.
Compliments are an essential ingredient for a peaceful and loving relationship.
It is mostly assumed that people who stray in their relationships are either missing the love that once pulled them in, or is no longer happy in the relationship.
However, the narrative is different for men.
Some affairs are born just to satisfy their egos and have nothing to do with their current relationships.
Let’s take a look at some of the reasons that’ll lead to you saying, “my husband never compliments me and what you can do about it.
My Husband Never Compliments Me: Why And What To Do
5 Reasons Your Husband Doesn’t Compliment You
1. They Get Too Busy To Even Pay Compliments
Normally, you get busy with other things with the progression of a relationship that most times, you don’t even have time to pay compliments or say positive things to your partner.
Your job is pulling you from one end, you probably have kids too who are draining you, there are bills to be paid.
The list is endless.
Sometimes, you get drowned in the confusion and noise of it all that you don’t remember to make out time to take a really good look at your partner and compliment them genuinely.
This is not far from why you’re mostly going, “my husband never compliments me.”
Your husband is probably overwhelmed with many life’s responsibilities.
2. They Begin To Take The Relationship For Granted
When they start taking the relationship for granted, you’ll have every cause to think, “my husband never compliments me.”
Generally, when people get what they want (in this context, a relationship or marriage), they move on quickly to acquire other goals.
However, the need for egos to be massaged constantly increases with time.
So, in their quest to get more achievements, the relationship gets sidelined as they get new goals to help massage their egos.
3. They Criticize You More And Openly
As the relationship progresses, the chances of criticizing your partner more become high.
You’ll not want to put off a potential partner by criticizing them.
You tend to let down your guard and begin to talk carelessly when you’re already in a relationship with them.
That’s when you begin to vocalize the things you’ll have ordinarily held back in before.
As we all know, negative information has more effect on the mind than positive information.
While positive actions and words can be forgotten in a jiffy, the negative ones tend to stick around for a while longer.
4. They Beam The Spotlight On Your Weaknesses
In the course of the relationship, you will become very much conscious of the weaknesses of your partner.
If care is not taken, you’ll begin to show how negatively it affects you, albeit, unconsciously.
While it is inevitable for people’s weaknesses to show as time goes on, it is totally within your power to control the urge to exploit these weaknesses of theirs.
The same thing applies to your partner.
You’ll notice their weaknesses, but try not to exploit them.
5. They Become Used To And Begin To Wave Off Your Compliments
Another thing that might get you to say that “my husband never compliments me” is when you begin to take the compliments paid to you by your partner for granted.
You’ll feel that you’re already aware of the love and likeness your partner has for you.
It’s too evident and is not new.
So, you begin to seek validation in the compliments of others because according to you, they’ll give you a certain kind of satisfaction which they of your partner can’t offer you.
Hearing it from someone else boosts your self-esteem and ego.
Another thing that might get you to say that “my husband never compliments me ” is when you begin to take the compliments paid to you by your partner for granted.
You’ll feel that you’re already aware of the love and likeness your partner has for you.
It’s too evident and is not new.
So, you begin to seek validation in the compliments of others because according to you, they’ll give you a certain kind of satisfaction which they of your partner can’t offer you.
Hearing it from someone else boosts your self-esteem and ego.
Whatever the reason, the bottom line is the same.
People realize often that the ego boosts they used to get from their relationships no longer gave them the satisfaction they crave.
For some people, they adjust accordingly, especially if they know that sometimes, life gets in the way of the sequence of events.
They try to balance out some of the negative things with positive vibes from the same relationship.
However, some other people do not adjust and so, end up looking outside for sources to boost their egos.
These people are too insecure and have a high need to be valued and appreciated.
So, consciously or unconsciously, they have to look for other ways to satisfy their egos.
They are not unhappy in their present relationship, far from it.
Their egos are just too big for any single relationship alone to satisfy.
What they can you do if your husband never complinents you and you hate it?
What To Do if Your Husband Never Compliments You
1. You Are Not Alone
Sometimes, we like to think we are the only ones going through a particular situation.
We think our challenges are peculiar to us, so others don’t understand.
We think our partners are different from everyone.
Truth is, people are more alike than they are different.
So, you are not the only one experiencing whatever it is you are going through.
Chances are that thousands of people are in your shoes.
A lot of women complain that their husbands don’t compliment them, enough.
I am one of those women.
I sometimes feel my husband doesn’t compliment me enough, so your husband isn’t exactly different from the majority of men.
Knowing you are not alone should give you some comfort.
2. Call His Attention to It
I once asked my husband why he doesn’t compliment me enough.
His response?
”You know you are beautiful. You are always beautiful. I don’t need to tell you that. Even if I don’t tell you, you know.”
Hahaha.
Funny, right?
Not really.🙄
I told him, ”Yes, I know but I need to hear it from you.”
Perhaps your husband thinks you know you are beautiful and he doesn’t need to remind you of it too.
Just talk to him to find out why he doesn’t compliment you as much as you want.
Assumption is the lowest level of knowledge.
Don’t assume he’s not complimenting you because he no longer loves you or finds you attractive.
Ask him.
You might be shocked at his response.
You may realize you’ve gotten it wrong all the while.
3. Remind Him or Help Him to Compliment You
Sometimes, after dressing up, I ask my husband, ”How do I look? Do I look beautiful?”
Then he goes, ”You are beautiful. You know you are.”🙄
Asking him questions could remind him to compliment you especially when he has a lot on his mind.
Instead of getting angry and feeling down because he didn’t compliment you after looking your best, remind him.
4. Be the Change You Want to See
You are not happy that your husband never compliments you, but do you compliment him?
Many of us think men don’t love being complimented for their looks, especially by their wives.
But they do!
Husbands also wonder if you still find them attractive. They want to know if they’re still your prince charming.
They want to know if they are still the handsome man you fell in live with.
So, babe, you are not the only one who loves to be complimented.
Be the change you want to see in your marriage.
Develop the habit of complimenting him and see if he’ll reciprocate the gesture.
While it’s all fun and romantic to be complimented by your husband and seek validation from him, I’d say the best validation you can get from anyone is one from yourself.
Self-love/self-worth is the best validation.
So that if your husband doesn’t compliment you as much as you want despite trying your best (you can only try, you can’t change anyone), you will not feel less attractive or less of yourself.
You are what you say you are, not what someone else says you are.
HeyRed
Monday 13th of June 2022
My husband never compliments me. He rarely did when we were first together. When he did it was always when I was nearly out of range to hear him. He also finds any little thing to use to cut me down. An example was a sickly tomato plant I bought recently but it was beyond recovery. He found a way to make me feel bad for it dying. We are both retired and together 24/7. He tries to fix every little thing about me that he doesn’t like, which appears to be a lot. This man acts inept when it comes to cleaning. He will do a terrible job which requires me doing it again. He is a very smart man and retired from the medical field. Common sense is lacking or thinking beyond analytical, technical things in his head. Everybody loves him and think he’s wonderful. I do everything for him while he watches tv and comments on how I am doing whatever it is I am doing. They don’t know the other side of him behide closed doors. All I want is a happy, fulfilling life, with a husband who loves me, cares about me, and isn’t afraid to show it.
Mabel's Blog
Monday 13th of June 2022
I'm so sorry about your experience. Have you tried communicating with him? Perhaps he doesn't realize how bad his actions are making you feel. Men can be clueless at times. If, after communicating with him, he doesn't change, you'd need to stand your ground and stop tolerating being disrespected.
Janefrances
Sunday 11th of July 2021
Mabel....been there, done that... Some are just exceptions to all your suggestions. I really don't care anymore if he compliments me. I don't look for compliments outside too(I rarely believe such). I'm just living my life for me.
Mabel's Blog
Tuesday 13th of July 2021
It's the best, really. Living your life for yourself.