“Do guys test you by ignoring you?”
Sis, let’s be factual; you’re asking this question because you like this guy, and you want to know if his attitude towards you is because he’s testing you.
Something may have given you the idea that a man can test you by ignoring you.
While you may not be right, you’re not entirely wrong either.
Here’s what I mean.
People sometimes use different parameters to judge or test the interest and attention of others in them.
But using tactics like ignoring you in a bid to gauge your level of interest is not a test; it is manipulation.
People don’t play such coarse mind games with the people they love because it is unhealthy and toxic.
But let me hit the brakes a little first, and let us take a closer look into the nitty gritty of this topic together.
We’ll start by considering two opposite but possible scenarios.
“Do Guys Test You By Ignoring You?”: The Two Sides Of The Coin
Let’s begin by considering two angles, shall we?
1. He is truly ignoring you
So you’ve been talking to this guy for some time, and the conversation has been flowing smoothly.
Perhaps you even went on a few dates together, and everything seemed fine.
Suddenly, things changed, and he no longer calls, texts, or wants to hang out.
Worse still, when you try to reach out, he ignores you.
Many things will cross your mind, and that’s very normal.
One of which may be you wondering if he’s ignoring you to test you or something related to that.
However, one possible option you may have failed to consider is that he may be ignoring you because that’s what he wants to do.
He’s not playing any mind games or trying to test you.
He just isn’t interested in the friendship or relationship anymore.
Of course, that’s an awful way to end things with someone you like, but some people do it.
So, I know you may be feeling or have felt frustrated and hurt.
But a possibility worth considering is that he is not testing you; he’s just ignoring you.
2. He is testing you
Now, let us explore the possibility that he is ignoring you to test you.
You may have noticed his attitude and asked yourself, “Is it a test?”.
Depending on your unique situation, you may not be too far from the truth.
Sadly, some people still send mixed signals and play the “ignoring” game to measure other people’s interest in them.
He may be ignoring you because he wants to elicit a form of response from you.
He probably wants you to chase after him or begin to plead for attention from him.
This is done in a bid to assess your level of commitment and affection.
Although he may have reasons for his actions, you must understand that this trait is unhealthy.
It is problematic and can have several deleterious effects.
The “Ignoring” Game And Why It Can Be Problematic: 4 Reasons
1. It shows a high level of selfishness
If a person chooses to ignore their partner or friend to test them, something is wrong.
The action itself is unhealthy and wrong, but beyond that, the intent behind it is also toxic.
It reveals the height of selfishness that a person possesses.
They are self-centered, thinking about themselves alone and not how their actions affect you.
This is a problem because if they can put you in such an unpleasant position just to satisfy their curiosity, then they may do even worse things.
2. Insecurities grow
When he makes ignoring you a weapon, he introduces an unhealthy habit capable of leading to a plethora of consequences.
Trying to test you by ignoring you will only lead to a high level of uncertainty in your mind.
This uncertainty will cause insecurities to build up and grow.
You may begin to question yourself and doubt your place in his life.
Anxiety may come in, and your emotions become taxed.
This is not a conducive situation for any relationship to thrive.
Your happiness will be stifled, and the relationship will be unhealthy.
3. Communication suffers
His actions directly attack communication, which is the bedrock for understanding in any relationship.
The ignoring game kills healthy and timely communication and leads to things like miscommunication and misinterpretation, which are equally bad.
When you are ignored, you will rely on assumptions often, which is not good.
Because he is not talking, you will listen to his body language and try to read it, which can be misleading.
It also works vice versa.
This leads to a lot of unnecessary drama that ultimately affects the trust in the relationship.
4. Unhealthy relationship dynamics
Generally, tactics like this make the relationship toxic and not conducive.
The power dynamics of the relationship between you two tilts towards the unhealthy side.
People do not test people they respect and value; his actions reveal how lightly he esteems you.
It may put you in a place where you constantly feel the need to prove yourself and pass his “tests.”
While he remains the alpha and omega, deciding when he wants to stay and when he wants to go.
It goes without saying that if you’re in a relationship where a man is testing you by ignoring you, you are in an unhealthy relationship.
These mind games and manipulation do not communicate respect to you as a person and as their partner.
Final words
Because every relationship, in whatever form it comes, thrives on communication, unhealthy tactics such as ignoring someone as a form of assessment will only stifle the growth of that relationship.
If you are experiencing this, and you strongly suspect that he is ignoring you to test you, it is important that you address it.
You can do this by expressing your feelings of confusion and feeling ignored.
I suggest you let him know that his actions are affecting you.
Ask him to clarify the situation because you seek answers.
It is always best to ask questions when you’re in doubt of someone’s intentions or unsure of their actions.
After you have heard his perspective, setting boundaries should be the next step.
Talking about what behaviors are acceptable and which ones are not.
This is essential for any healthy relationship.
Finally, It is important that you seek help if this behavior is persistent and causing you discomfort.
Your mental health may be suffering from the burden of always trying to decode his actions and behavior.
This situation attacks the key ingredients for a healthy relationship, which are mutual understanding, trust, and respect.