Why this segment- Couple Interview?
It’s no longer news that a lot of singles are scared of marriage because of the many unappealing stories we hear and read – domestic violence, cheating. emotional and psychological abuse, in-laws trouble, deception and other happenings that would make you not want to get married.
But the truth is, not every marriage is in trouble, not every married person is unhappy. Marriage is just like an aircraft; a safe flight rarely makes a news but a plane crash will definitely catch the attention of the media and the people.
Couple Interview is aimed at propagating the gospel of marriage and balancing the perspective of people about marriage. A happy marriage rarely makes a news but the news of domestic violence, deception, and other unpalatable occurrences usually trend on the internet thereby creating the dangers of a single story which includes the fear of marriage called gametophobia.
The purpose of Couple Interview isn’t to portray a perfect marriage, because honestly, no marriage is perfect. People make a marriage and there is no perfect person anywhere. So no marriage can ever be perfect. Marriage consists of two imperfect people who have refused to give up on each other and their union.
The couple featured today are young, in love, sincere, and they make you want to get married asap! Lol. Temitope Folorunsho, an Environmental Biologist, is married to Catherine, a Microbiologist and a Cake Artist. This is a couple I’m so happy for and proud of. You will know why in their interview.
Enjoy their interview:
How long have you been married?
Couple: A year and five months.
How did you meet?
Tope: We connected via the group you (Olubunmi Mabel) established a few years ago(PSR). She thought I was still in a relationship but I was not and had other plans.
Catherine: Via social media (Facebook).
What was the focus of attraction and was it love at first sight?
Tope: Love at virtual sight…lol. Some connections are mysterious and uncommon. I’ve been following her in that group. Lost a relationship and some months after the blip, I found her. It all started with a hi and hello, scheduled a meeting and rest they say is history.
Catherine: His simplicity. Not love at first sight.
How does your spouse complement you?
Tope: Perfectly! Best definition of a helpmeet for me. I’m never a complete man and areas I’m deficient, she fills seamlessly. For example, she is a good manager of resources and has motherly traits. My life has really improved, on all sides and fronts, since the day I met Catherine.
Catherine: He’s actually neater, so he makes up for me in that regard. But hey, I’m also neat o, just that ehn…
Was there any challenge or opposition in getting married?
Tope: Not at all.
Catherine: There was a challenge we encountered but we summoned it. No opposition.
What do you call your spouse?
Tope: Sweetheart, Darling and Iya wa oninure(Our mummy with a good heart)
Catherine: MYIT (Calls him that most times. Wanna know the meaning? See me in camera. LOL), then, Boo and baba wa olokan ire (i.e our father with a good heart. Calls him this most times we are jesting).
|Tope and Cath when they were still dating.|
What do you call your spouse when you’re angry?
Tope: Still sweetheart…(angry tone). The displeasure will eat the SWEET but the heart will remain.
Catherine: Still calls him MYIT but not Boo this time (Angry mode).
What is the most memorable moment of your marriage this year?
Tope: Hmmm…. the most memorable (racks brain). The day she broke the news of our pregnancy! The manner in which it was heralded….I was not expecting anything and the suspense made me ooze sweat from my pores.
Catherine: This year! That was the day our handsome prince joined us.
What is the most challenging moment of your marriage this year?
Tope: Having a baby looks more like an unfamiliar terrain. You can’t know how your path will look like. The adjustment and sacrifices can be challenging.
Catherine: Challenging moment this year has been combining motherhood with being a student but hubby has been super supportive to ease the tension in ways he could.
What’s your opinion on long-distance marriage?
Tope: Long distance is never a barrier in my opinion, even though I don’t advocate for such in marriage. Let’s also note it is not a taboo. It will only take a lot of communication patterns, visitations, and trust. You can be in a relationship and not see frequently. It works, if you are serious about it.
Catherine: Personally, from experience, it’s no fun.
Why do you think married people cheat?
Tope: Three reasons. First, a cheat is a cheat regardless of reasons to do so. Which means you can meet all his/her needs and infidelity still occurs. Second, they can cheat to fill a void and it doesn’t even satisfy. He/she makes you angry(you cheat), he is not good in bed, lack of facial or bodily appeals. Third, distance(physical or emotional).
Catherine: Because they are undisciplined most times. Some really don’t plan to but you see, when you don’t know when to draw the line in your relationship/communication with an opposite sex, you will soon misbehave.
Do you have access to each other’s devices?
Tope: Certainly. Not by law, but by freedom. She picks at will.
What do you enjoy doing with your spouse?
Tope: All things. Bathing together, kitchen works and bedmatics(I like that area).
Catherine: Gisting, household chores and disturbing him (LOL).
How does social media influence your marriage?
Tope: Not much. I’m more into social media than her. Sometimes, I remind her of the need to check. We also, at time reads stuff on any platform together. She often sends me issues and demands my opinions about it. We also know when to go offline for ourselves. Fun all the way.
Catherine: Positively in some aspects, like getting more informed on how to care for our son and improve the home in general, the only negative (which we still try to control) is staying too long online while we are supposed to be enjoying each other’s company.
Do you have kids? If yes, how have they influenced your marriage?
Tope: Yes, we do. Still in the early days with not a weighty influence. Like I said earlier, a baby in our lives can be challenging. We are being groomed in sacrificial living. Practically, we don’t use a fan at times, electrical appliances are not fixed anyhow, our sleep can be shortened, delayed or never observed. The baby can also influence your bedmatics(if you know, you know). We are still learning.
Catherine: A kid, yes. His arrival has made us more responsible. And right now, we have to consider our little man before we go out to have fun, most times, we cancel some dates that we know wouldn’t be conducive for him but in all, we are enjoying the sacrifices.
Does marriage get boring or better with time?
Tope: It can be both ways, depending on the ideology of the couples involved. Staying with a person, especially forever can be tiresome and boring if things are done the same way or pattern. For us, it is the latter. We zealously create a sociable environment in our discharge of matrimonial duties. Never a dull moment!
Catherine: Better and better with time.
What do you wish you had known before getting married?
Tope: Sex is not by mouth. It is physics (requires mechanics).
Catherine: I’m seriously trying to remember. Yes! I wish l had known to add reasonable extra inches to all the the new native wears l sewed. Wore most only a few months. Very painful.
What do you want your spouse to improve on?
Tope: Smiles (hope she won’t kill me when she reads this…). She should not be scattering things. That “manly” attitude of ruggedness…lol.
Catherine: His time out with God
Complete this sentence- Marriage is……
Tope: not as complex as widely speculated.
Catherine: heaven on earth for me.
Fun, right? If you enjoyed this interview and you’d love to be a part of this segment, kindly send me an email – firstname.lastname@example.org
You don’t need to have a perfect marriage as there is no perfect marriage anywhere. You only need to believe in the institution of marriage. Marriage works! And this segment is one of the ways to prove that to the world. I can’t wait to feature your marriage here.