How do you not lose yourself in the name of love when you are in a relationship?
Because some women easily lose themselves when they are in love.
How do you avoid placing more importance on your boyfriend than yourself?
How do you know how to love yourself more than your boyfriend?
HOW TO LOVE YOURSELF MORE THAN YOUR BOYFRIEND
1. Develop healthy self-esteem/self-worth
Self-esteem is an estimation of your own worth.
It is the assessment, evaluation, and perception of yourself and who you are.
How you see yourself and who you think yourself to be.
One of the psychological needs of an individual is healthy self-esteem.
Just as oxygen is needed to live and breathe, one’s emotional and mental psyche cannot be sound and absolute without a healthy dose of self-esteem.
It acts as an interface between your interactions and relationships with others.
It guides your actions, decisions, and desires.
Healthy self-esteem is not selfishness; rather, it is characterized by self-love, self-respect, self-admiration, self-importance etc.
Without these attributes in place, a balanced relationship is not realistic.
2. Set boundaries
Boundaries are limits to ensure that certain lines are not crossed.
Humans, sometimes, cannot help themselves, this is where rules come in.
The key to order and balance in relationships is creating boundaries.
Boundaries don’t eradicate or remove the joy and the fun in a relationship, but rather enforce them.
Restrictions define the meaning of a relationship.
You can have boundaries and still enjoy the relationship as much as possible.
Having and setting boundaries in relationships does not make you a prude. It says that you love and value yourself and hold yourself in high esteem.
Set boundaries and ensure that they are not often violated.
3. Communicate your values
We all have principles we hold dear.
Our values light our path through life and help us make meaning of our existence.
The true hallmark of personal values is in being consistently upheld.
As an individual, you should have rules and conduct about life and relationships.
Make your values known to your partner and see it that they are not betrayed.
4. Have deal breakers
Deal breakers are non-negotiable factors that will cause you to back out of a relationship.
Deal breakers initiate standards and accountability.
As a lady, you should express your deal breakers in your relationship to your partner.
It should never be ”anything goes” with you.
Having deal breakers does not make you rigid nor unforgiving. Of course, there are certain things you should not and cannot put up with in a relationship. Your deal beakers are unique to you and should stem from your own convictions.
Have standards, the right man would meet them.
5. Don’t lose yourself
It is not uncommon to see ladies depreciate their self-hood when they are in love.
You should never lose yourself in a relationship.
Your identity and self-identity should be maintained and remain intact.
What makes you you should remain so, no matter how genuine and true the love is.
Your individuality distinguishes, separates, and stands you out. It is your true power and you should never lose it nor give it away for anything.
The quality and state of being you should be preserved.
Your traits and characteristics should not be compromised.
All of the qualities stated above should only be upgraded and improved and made better, not watered down or erased.
6. Keep your eyes on your dreams and life goals
Goals, dreams, aspirations and objectives in life are some of the things that define an individual.
Without them, a person is lost and drifts through life.
Your goals give you a sense of direction in life.
Your goals and your dreams define you and chart your course through life.
When you have your own life and personal ambitions, you place less demand on your relationship to keep you entertained and occupied.
Keeping your eyes on your aims in life elevates and sharpens your focus and makes you more attractive.
It also depicts that you place high value on yourself and your life.
7. Watch out for red flags
Red flags are warning signals in a person.
They are not necessarily deal breakers, but they are signs that threaten the health and balance of a relationship
You should never ignore warning signals.
Pay attention to them and to other things that seem off to you.
Love should never make you blind to red flags.
Speak up when something does not sit right with you.
Watching out for red flags will save you a lot of heartbreak.
8. Don’t hide your relationship
You should never make your relationship a secret.
When you are in a relationship, don’t isolate yourself from your family and friends.
Relationships that involve other parties have higher and likelier chances of survival and success.
Any love that separates you from other people does not have your best interests at heart.
Refuse to be hidden and kept away.
9. Beware of sacrifices
It is never easy to make sacrifices, but once love is in the air, it becomes the easiest thing to do.
Be wary of the sacrifices you make in a relationship.
Don’t make irreversible sacrifices.
True love will not put you in a position where you have to sacrifice your dreams and your happiness.
Don’t do things you will later regret or that will put your life in setbacks.
Genuine love should elevate your happiness and support your ambitions.
Evaluate every big action and decision before execution.
Think carefully about them.
Keep in mind that some decisions are irreversible.
Once done, there is no taking them back.
10. Practise self-love
Ultimate self-love is prioritising your happiness and welfare.
When you practise self-love, you put your well-being at the forefront in all occasions.
Proper self-love is not selfishness, but watching out for yourself.
Self-love is teaching people how to love you by you loving yourself first.
The way you love yourself shows people how you want to be loved.
Therefore, there is no balanced romantic relationship without at first, self-love on both sides.
Respect is one of the most important ingredients in a healthy and balanced relationship based on mutual love and effort.
No real relationship can survive without it.
Self-love is self-respect.
To respect others, you have to respect yourself first.
Everyone needs to love themselves to successfully and properly master relationships of all kinds especially romantic relationships.
With that, heartbreaks and broken relationships will be lessened.
11. Quit when it gets toxic
Toxic love is not love at all.
Don’t be deceived.
Real love is not agony, anguish, pain, torment, affliction, suffering, torture.
True and real love is kind, warm, blissful, and protective.
It builds, strengthens, fortifies and encourages.
It does not weaken, harm, impair, diminish, tear down or seek to destroy and damage.
It should be a relationship, not prison.
A relationship should be a source of support and joy.
Partners would sometimes hurt one another, because there is no perfect relationship or perfect people, but if it is more misery than bliss, then you need to reconsider.
Once a relationship starts to get detrimental and cause discomfort to your emotional and mental wellness, do not hesitate to pull the cord.
Run!
