There was a time in my life when I didn’t feel attractive at all.
I questioned whether I had that presence, the kind that makes people take notice.
I would constantly compare myself to others, and it seemed like no matter what I did or how much effort I put into my appearance, I just couldn’t measure up.
It was a constant battle with my self-esteem and confidence.
But then, something changed.
I realized that beauty is not just about physical appearance but also about inner qualities and characteristics.
This is because I am a beautiful woman if I say so myself.
I started focusing on improving my mindset and self-worth instead of trying to conform to society’s standards of beauty.
It was a journey of self-discovery and self-love, and it made all the difference.
As I grew more confident in myself, I noticed that others started to see me differently, too.
My presence became more noticeable, not because of how I looked but because of the inner beauty and confidence radiating from within me.
I no longer felt the need to compare myself to others or seek validation from anyone else.
I was comfortable in my own skin, and that was truly liberating.
Attractiveness is so much more than how you look.
It’s about how you show up in the world.
It’s about confidence, energy, and knowing who you are at your core.
The truth is, someone with the most symmetrical face and a sculpted body can still feel completely invisible if they don’t own their worth.
You don’t need to chase attractiveness—you need to step into it.
I honestly know what it feels like to feel unattractive, and here are seven things you need to stop doing if you want to be more attractive.
If You Want To Be More Attractive, Instantly Stop Doing These 7 Things.
1. Stop Thinking Less Of Yourself.
The way you carry yourself plays a huge role in how much attraction and attention you draw from others.
Confidence is not an inherent trait for everyone, but it’s a skill that can be learned, practiced, and perfected over time.
It’s not about never feeling unsure or doubtful; it’s about choosing to present yourself with certainty, even when insecurities linger in the background.
Always aim to appear confident no matter what might be going on in your life.
How you present yourself externally can make an enormous difference, even if you’re still working on your inner self-belief.
I once came across a quote in a book that stuck with me: “A confident fool is better than a wise man who is a coward.”
While it may sound amusing at first, there’s a lot of truth in it.
Confidence is often the deciding factor that allows someone to act, take risks, and be noticed—qualities that hesitation and self-doubt can easily suppress.
Confidence gives you an edge, even if you aren’t the most beautiful, handsome, or knowledgeable person in the room.
It has a magnetic quality that makes you stand out, enhancing your natural appeal and making you more attractive than you might be when feeling self-conscious.
It’s not just about looks; it sends a message that you believe in yourself, which invites others to believe in you, too.
People are naturally drawn to those who exude self-assurance; it creates a sense of trust and respect, even when you might not feel entirely competent.
One of the greatest benefits of confidence is the respect it earns.
Even when you feel like you’re falling short in some areas, how you hold yourself can influence how others perceive and treat you.
2. Stop Trying To Be Like Someone Else.
There is only ONE of you.
One!
That means the world has never seen anyone exactly like you before, and there will never be another you again.
So, why waste time trying to be someone else?
I remember taking voice lessons years ago and asking my coach if I could train my voice to sound like Michael Jackson.
Very funny, right?
Now that I’m much more knowledgeable and have grown over the years, I feel shy about revealing that.
But his response that day changed my life forever.
He looked at me and said, “We already have a Michael Jackson. But we don’t have YOU.”
Whew! That moment changed my life.
It is so easy to look at someone else’s journey and think, “If only I had what they had.” But honey, comparison is a thief.
It steals your joy, your uniqueness, and your confidence.
Instead of trying to walk someone else’s path, carve out your own path.
You weren’t put here to be a carbon copy of anybody.
You were meant to shine in your own way.
Don’t get me wrong; I’m not saying you shouldn’t have mentors; of course, I’ve got mentors, and I admire them for their courage, determination, and success.
But I’ve also realized that trying to be like someone else will only lead to disappointment.
We are each unique individuals with our own set of talents, skills, and experiences.
Our journey is not meant to mimic someone else’s, but rather, to create our own path and make our own mark in the world.
So, next time you catch yourself trying to be someone else, remember my voice coach’s wise words: “We already have them. We need YOU.”
When you embrace your own voice, your quirks, and your way of doing things, that’s when you truly stand out.
That’s when you become magnetic.
You are a masterpiece, just as you are.
So, own it, love it, and watch how the world takes notice.
3. Stop Neglecting Your Health.
Do you pick up the bruised, rotten apple when you walk into a grocery store?
No.
You go for the one that looks fresh and vibrant, and it’s the same with us.
Your health is a direct reflection of how much you value yourself.
How you treat your body speaks volumes about your self-respect and personal discipline.
If you truly want to be attractive, you must prioritize your health—physically, mentally, and emotionally.
That is what will determine how much you truly shine.
Start by paying attention to what you eat.
Nourish your body with whole, nutritious foods rather than relying on processed junk that drains your energy and leaves you dull.
Hydrate well because nothing is appealing about dull skin and sluggishness.
And don’t forget to sleep.
Lack of rest affects your mood and productivity and makes you look exhausted.
Let’s be honest—no one finds dark circles and constant fatigue attractive.
Prioritizing your health is not an act of selfishness; it’s an act of self-love.
You cannot pour into others if your cup is empty.
When you take care of yourself, you exude an energy that is undeniably attractive.
Stop putting your well-being on the back burner and start treating yourself like the valuable person you are.
4. Stop Avoiding Movement.
Exercising does not necessarily mean signing up for an expensive gym membership or dedicating hours to intense workouts.
The goal is simple—just move.
Movement is life, and the more you engage in it, the better you feel.
You don’t have to start with a hardcore routine.
It can be as simple as a morning stretch, a brisk walk around the block, or even a short jog.
Even dancing to your favorite song in your living room counts.
The point is to keep your body active and energized.
A sedentary lifestyle affects not just your physical health but your confidence and energy levels, too.
Regular movement improves blood circulation, enhances posture, and lifts your mood, all of which make you more attractive.
Plus, when you take care of your body, you naturally carry yourself with more poise and self-assurance.
If you’re not sure where to start, search YouTube for beginner-friendly workout routines and start with indoor exercises.
Once you build momentum, you can gradually explore outdoor activities or more structured fitness plans.
The key is consistency—doing something, no matter how small, every day.
The attractiveness you’re looking for might just be hiding in the workouts you keep avoiding.
So, don’t put it off.
Start today, not tomorrow, and watch how your confidence and appeal transform.
I am a living testament to the wonders of movement.
I started moving my body more regularly a few weeks ago, and I’ve noticed significant changes in how others perceive me.
I stand taller, smile more often, and feel more confident in social situations.
But beyond the physical benefits, working out has had a profound impact on my mental well-being.
It serves as an outlet for stress and anxiety, and it leaves me feeling energized and positive.
In fact, studies have shown that regular exercise can boost self-esteem and reduce symptoms of depression and anxiety.
So, staying active will make you physically attractive and enhance your inner beauty.
5. Stop Looking Like What You’re Going Through.
Listen, I get it—life can be tough.
We all go through storms, but how you present yourself to the world speaks volumes.
Some people walk around wearing their struggles like a badge, letting hardship dull their shine.
But honey, you do not have to look like what you’re going through!
There’s a reason the saying goes, “You’re addressed the way you’re dressed.”
If you don’t invest in your appearance, why should anyone else?
You have to take control of how you show up because, whether we like it or not, the world responds to how we present ourselves.
A doctor in their full attire will never be mistaken for an engineer.
The way you carry yourself tells the world who you are and how you should be treated.
If you want to be attractive, you have to look attractive.
Stand in front of the mirror and ask yourself, “Do I look like the best version of me?”
If the answer is no, then it’s time to make some changes—immediately!
You can’t walk into a courtroom looking like a garage mechanic and expect people to take you seriously.
Invest in yourself.
Dress for the life you want, not just the one you have.
Even if you’re facing challenges, show up in a way that reflects the person you aspire to be.
My friend and I term it as making an effort even when we don’t feel like it.
It’s about showing up for yourself and giving yourself the respect you deserve.
This doesn’t mean you have to spend a fortune on designer clothes, but it does require paying attention to details like fit, color, and overall presentation.
Think of your attire as your personal branding tool – it speaks volumes about who you are and how seriously you take yourself.
And when you look good, you feel good too.
Dressing well can boost your confidence and give off a positive energy that attracts others.
Beyond just physical appearance, dressing appropriately also shows respect for the situation or event at hand.
6. Remaining On The Same Level Of Knowledge.
Life is about growth.
You were not created to stay stagnant.
If your smartphone can update itself to keep up with the latest advancements, why shouldn’t you?
If you’re not expanding your mind, learning something new, or challenging yourself to think beyond your comfort zone, then honey, you’re holding yourself back!
Knowledge is power, and staying informed keeps you relevant.
The world is moving fast, and if you don’t keep up, you get left behind.
Read books, listen to podcasts, watch educational videos—whatever it takes to sharpen your mind.
The more you know, the more you can contribute, and the more engaging you become, and trust me, people find that attractive.
I’m not saying you need to be a walking encyclopedia, but having depth, insight, and curiosity?
That’s magnetic.
That’s how you draw people in.
So, step out of your comfort zone.
Learn something new every day.
Stay ahead of the curve.
Keep evolving; you are not Peter Pan.
And a person who is always growing is attractive!
7. Stop Spreading Negative Vibes.
Energy is EVERYTHING.
Have you ever walked into a room and immediately felt the heaviness, like someone just sucked the life out of it?
That’s what negative energy does.
And if you’re the one carrying it around, then baby, you’re repelling people without even realizing it.
A few years ago, I had a classmate who was known as “King Negative.”
He had a problem for every solution.
And one day, he came to me and asked, “Do I have a negative vibe?”
Whew! I had to be real with him.
The truth is, if people avoid you, or if doors aren’t opening for you or if you’re always at odds with everyone around you—then it might not be them.
It might be YOU.
Now, let’s be clear.
I’m not saying you need to be a people-pleaser.
But what I am saying is, don’t be the person who drains the room.
Self-reflect.
Ask yourself, “Am I constantly complaining?
Am I always criticizing?
Do I leave people feeling inspired, or do they walk away exhausted?”
This is because the energy you put out is the energy you attract.
If you want to be more attractive—mentally, emotionally, spiritually—start by shifting your vibe.
Speak life, not negativity.
Be the kind of person people want to be around.
When you radiate good energy, you don’t have to chase connections—connections naturally come to you.