There’s going to be a little TMI (too much information) if you don’t mind.
So recently, my husband was kissing me in a way that took me down memory lane to the days we were newly married.
The days of passionate kissing that made my knees weak and reassured me of his longing for me.
In fact, I told him afterward that he reminded me of those days, and I asked him why he now occasionally does that.
Some women don’t love kissing, but I’m not one of them.
I love to think I’m a good kisser.
Anyways, what I’m trying to say is that if you are wondering why many husbands have stopped kissing their wives, you are not alone.
So let’s discuss this issue.
Why do husbands stop kissing their wives?
Why do your husband’s tender pecks become as rare as a lunar eclipse?
12 Eye-Opening Reasons Husbands Stop Kissing Their Wives
1. The Pressure of Daily Stress
Stress is a potent passion killer.
Honestly, I think stress is the major culprit in this matter.
I wrote recently on Facebook that we often underestimate the effect stress can have on a marriage, especially with kids.
Bills to pay, deadlines to meet, and the ups and downs of life can lead to stress, which in turn can affect intimacy.
Like the wise say, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
When a man is emotionally and mentally exhausted, he may unintentionally reduce his displays of affection.
Yes, unintentionally, because most men don’t even realize that their pecks have become a rarity until a wife points it out.
Most men just want to hit the shower, eat a nice meal, and lay in bed after a long day.
The last thing on their minds is to be romantic and kiss their wives.
Well, not every man is like this.
Some men are intentional about showing affection to their wives, even if they are stressed.
And those men deserve a cold glass of their favorite drink.
Drinks on me, guys!
2. Distractions Galore
We are grateful for the gift of technology and how easier it has made life for us.
But there are times when our tech devices can be a roadblock to marriage bliss.
Social media, video games, Netflix, and other digital platforms have the uncanny ability to pull our attention away from that special someone.
In the age of technology, distractions are just a click away.
If you or your spouse is spending more time scrolling through social media or glued to Netflix, it could be eating into your couple’s time.
This digital overdose can create a physical disconnect, making even a simple kiss seem like a chore.
”Familiarity breeds contempt,” they say.
In marriage, this means that when couples become too familiar with each other, they may forget to express their love and appreciation for one another or may ignore each other’s needs.
And this is so true.
I call it ”the see-finish syndrome.”
Once you have seen each other in the same old way for a while, it’s easy to overlook or take for granted the things that initially made your spouse so special.
When love is fresh, kisses are plentiful.
But in marriage, we get comfortable with each other, and the need to express love physically diminishes.
Familiarity often leads to a kind of forgetting.
4. Your Husband is Dealing with Health Issues
Marriage vows include the promise to stay with each other for better or worse, and one of the worse times is when a spouse has an illness.
From a simple cold to more complex health problems, physical illness can impact a person’s willingness to be intimate.
My husband and I usually suffer from seasonal allergies, and it’s not a funny experience.
During these times, our focus is on feeling well enough to fulfill our responsibilities.
So, if your husband has health issues, he might not be kissing you as much as you’d want.
5. Self-Esteem Issues
Believe it or not, men struggle with body image and self-esteem issues too.
If your husband is going through a phase where he is not feeling good about himself.
For instance, if he’s gained weight, is dealing with hair loss, or has been facing criticism at work, it could impact his self-esteem.
This lowered self-confidence can manifest in several ways in a relationship, one of which could be a decrease in physical displays of affection like kissing.
Confidence is the sexiest attire a person can wear.
Confident people are more likely to be romantic than those who are not sure of themselves.
If your husband is low on self-esteem, it can affect the frequency at which he kisses you.
6. Lack of Communication
You must have read a million times that communication is the key to a successful relationship.
It holds true in this case as well.
If there’s something bothering your husband, and he hasn’t opened up about it, he may be reluctant to express himself physically too.
Lack of communication can cause a drift in a marriage.
When couples don’t share their thoughts, feelings, or concerns, misunderstandings can arise, which can ultimately lead to fewer kisses.
Open up those communication lines and talk, talk, talk!
From talking, you can even share some kisses.
7. Boredom in the Bedroom
It’s not unusual for things to get a bit dull in the bedroom, especially if you’ve been married for a long time.
When intimacy becomes monotonous or routine, it loses its charm.
If your husband finds the routine of kissing unexciting, he might skip it more often than not.
To bring back the excitement, try to switch things up in the bedroom.
8. Lack of Personal Space
Even in the most intimate relationships, personal space is crucial.
It’s crucial for partners to preserve their individuality even when they are in a relationship.
If your husband feels overwhelmed or smothered, he may be less inclined to get close and show his affection through kissing.
This is especially true if he doesn’t have much time to spend alone.
9. Discomfort With Intimacy
Intimacy can be a source of discomfort for some people, even in committed relationships.
Your husband may find kissing uncomfortable if he has difficulty expressing his emotions or is not used to being intimate.
If your love language is physical touch, and your husband no longer kisses you, it can lead to sexual and emotional dissatisfaction.
10. The Chase is Over
In the early stages of dating, men usually put in a lot of effort to win a lady’s heart.
They do things like surprising her with gifts, going on romantic dates, and of course, lots of kissing.
This period is the ‘chase.’
They want to show that they are romantic.
But then, they get married and relax a bit.
They become complacent, and the kisses reduce as the years increase.
Not cool, guys!
11. The Myth of Masculinity
Society’s stereotypes about masculinity can sometimes hamper the expression of love.
Men are taught that they should be strong, stoic, and not show emotions.
They think being too romantic will make them look weak or vulnerable, and thus they often avoid being affectionate.
If your husband feels that being too affectionate or expressive makes him less ‘manly,’ it could be why he’s holding back on the kisses.
Bro, break the stereotype and kiss your wife!
12. He’s No Longer Sexually Attracted To You
No one wants to hear that their husband is no longer attracted to them, but sometimes it’s the truth.
Men who are very much attracted to their wives are more likely to touch their wives than men who are not attracted to them.
If your man used to be affectionate and now he isn’t, it could be because his spark for you has gone out, or at least dimmed.
This list isn’t exhaustive, because people are different, and so are their circumstances, but it gives us an idea of the various reasons why your husband has stopped kissing you.
If you are concerned about this issue, don’t be afraid to talk to him and find out what is going on.
Communication is key in any relationship.
The goal is not to blame him but to understand together, and find ways to reignite the spark.
And most importantly, if you want to be kissed, don’t always wait for him to make the first move.
It takes two to tango.
Kiss him too.
Who knows maybe he has stopped kissing you because you have stopped kissing him?
Remind him of the good old days when you would kiss each other several times a day.
Take the initiative to revive the passion in your marriage.
He’ll likely reciprocate the gesture and resume kissing you too.