There’s a big misunderstanding that women don’t struggle with sexual dissatisfaction as much as men do.
I think it stems from the stereotype that women aren’t as interested in sex and don’t have the same desire for a physical relationship.
Unfortunately, this isn’t true.
Women experience sexual dissatisfaction just like men do, but it can be very difficult to talk about because of the stigma attached to talking about sex publicly.
The reality is that when a married woman is sexually unsatisfied, there are physical, psychological, and emotional consequences, and we’ll talk about that in this article.
Come with me.
8 Things That Happen When a Married Woman Is Sexually Dissatisfied
1. She Feels Less Confident
Did you know that sexual satisfaction has a huge impact on a woman’s self-perception and confidence?
Yep, it’s true!
Feeling satisfied can make you feel more desirable and give your self-esteem a big boost.
But if the opposite is true, and you’re not hitting the high notes, you might start doubting your own attractiveness and questioning whether you’re good enough.
These self-doubts can start to impact other areas of your life too, like work, social situations, and decision-making.
You might even start overanalyzing your partner’s every move, looking for confirmation of your own insecurities.
2. She Feels Unloved and Unappreciated
When a woman isn’t sexually satisfied, she may start to feel that her needs aren’t important.
This feeling of worthlessness often leads to unhappiness in her marriage because she doesn’t feel like her husband values her needs or understands them.
Because if her needs do matter, why isn’t her spouse meeting them?
So she might start to feel lonely and uncared for, and this often leads to her feeling resentful and disconnected from her partner.
3. She Might Start Feeling Trapped
You know marriage is a big commitment, it is for better or for worse.
It’s easier to quit a relationship than it is to quit a marriage.
So when a woman isn’t getting her sexual needs met, she might start to feel trapped in a loveless and sexless marriage.
Because she can’t just wake up and quit a marriage, especially when you have kids.
In fact, even if she wants to quit, she’ll wonder what she’d tell people is her reason for quitting.
She can’t just tell them she’s quitting because her husband isn’t giving her the kind of sex life she needs.
So this might make her even more resentful of her partner for leaving her feeling stuck in an unhappy situation, aka a sexless marriage, which is the experience of many.
4. Not Interested in Sex Anymore
I mean, what do you expect?
Why would you want to engage in an activity that has consistently made you feel inadequate and frustrated?
If a woman isn’t getting what she needs sexually, it’s often not something she wants to repeat.
And this could actually be a self-protective measure.
If she repeatedly feels dissatisfied, she might start avoiding sex to shield herself from the disappointment and emotional upset that comes with it.
This is a common reaction when a person experiences repeated instances of an event that doesn’t meet their expectations.
Also, sexual activity is an intimate act that requires emotional investment.
If a woman is not finding the experience fulfilling, she might withdraw emotionally, which can translate into a reduced interest in sex.
In fact, the human brain is wired to seek pleasure and avoid pain.
If sex becomes associated with feelings of frustration or dissatisfaction instead of pleasure, the brain might start treating sex as something to avoid.
Thus, a woman might show her lack of interest by making excuses to avoid sex or by becoming physically unresponsive.
5. Discontentment in Relationship
Even if everything else in the marriage is perfect, sexual dissatisfaction can lead to overall discontentment.
Because sex is an important part of a union, and it’s difficult to keep a marriage alive and healthy if one partner is not sexually fulfilled.
In fact, studies have found that sexual dissatisfaction is one of the top predictors of divorce.
So, this is not a problem to be taken lightly.
6. She Might Resent Her Husband
Just as you are happy with your partner when they meet your needs, you will be unhappy with them when they don’t.
If a woman does not feel satisfied in the bedroom, she may start to resent her husband.
This is because sex is one of the main reasons why a man and woman get married.
When it’s not happening, the woman might feel like she’s missing out on something that’s supposed to be part of her marriage, and this can make her angry, resentful, and even depressed.
7. She Might Look For Ways To Have Her Sexual Needs Met Elsewhere
”..deliver us from temptation…”
Everyone gets tempted from time to time, but it’s easier to get tempted in an area of your life where you feel deprived.
That’s why an unsatisfied wife may begin to explore other avenues to have her needs met, including seeking out emotional and sexual partners outside of her marriage.
She may start by engaging with people online who will give her the attention she desires or even have physical affairs outside of the home.
She’s literally looking for someone who can provide her with the pleasure and fulfillment that her husband isn’t able to give.
She might also turn to pornography, fantasy, or sex toys as a temporary substitute to fill the void.
Falling into temptation has consequences, of course.
A wife who begins to cheat or otherwise engage in activities that go against her marriage vows can damage the trust and respect within the relationship.
Her husband may feel betrayed, lied to, and even humiliated by his wife’s actions.
And the wife may experience guilt, shame, regret, feelings of worthlessness, low self-esteem, and even fear of being found out.
8. Separation or Divorce
For women who can’t endure being sexually dissatisfied, they may opt to separate or end the marriage.
However, this can be one of the most painful and difficult decisions a wife has to make, especially if she still loves her husband and may feel guilty for breaking up the family.
She may also fear the social stigma associated with divorce or separation and wonder what other people would think.
If you are a wife experiencing sexual dissatisfaction, consider these few tips:
1. Consider the cause of your dissatisfaction.
Consider the factors that may have caused your dissatisfaction.
Could it be due to
- emotional issues such as feeling neglected or feeling unappreciated by your husband
- lack of communication between you two
- sexual issues, such as having different sexual needs or desires than your partner and not being able to communicate those effectively enough.
- health issues such as erectile dysfunction or difficulty reaching orgasm
- a combination of these issues?
Whatever it may be, finding out why you are dissatisfied is essential in order for you to figure out how to address it and work towards a fulfilling sexual relationship with your spouse.
2. Discuss your dissatisfaction with your husband
You can’t solve this problem on your own, so you have to involve your husband in the process.
Explain to your husband what you are feeling, and don’t be afraid to talk about it.
Tell him your frustrations, worries, and difficulties you have been facing in the bedroom.
If you can’t put it into words, try writing a letter, sending a text message, or making a list of points that you can discuss with him.
Once he has heard what you have to say, give him the opportunity to share his perspective.
Perhaps he is frustrated too.
Maybe he has his own issues that you can help each other work through.
Sharing your feelings and listening to his can be a great starting point for tackling this problem together.
3. Establish expectations
Once both of you have expressed your concerns, create an atmosphere of openness and understanding in the bedroom.
Set out clear boundaries and expectations for both of you: what is acceptable behavior, how often you should be having sex, etc.
It might also help to lay out a plan for when things go wrong or don’t go as expected in the bedroom.
Discussing these topics will create a mutual understanding that will help prevent any future misunderstandings or arguments.
4. Spend quality time together
Although communication is key to any successful relationship, it’s also important to spend quality time with each other outside the bedroom.
This could involve going on a romantic date, taking a weekend getaway, watching movies together, taking a walk, or just spending some quiet moments together.
Make sure to do things that you each enjoy and find meaningful.
This will help strengthen your bond.
5. See a sex therapist
If you feel like you need additional help, see a sex therapist.
A sex therapist can provide a safe, non-judgmental environment to discuss any feelings or concerns you have about sex.
They can help address any underlying issues that might be impacting your sex life.
Therapy can also teach you helpful skills to improve communication and sexual satisfaction.
If you decide to go this route, make sure to find a therapist who is certified and experienced in working with couples.
This will ensure that you get the best possible care.
6. Have fun!!!
Above all, remember to have fun with each other.
Sex should not be a chore or something you dread doing but an enjoyable activity that both of you look forward to.
Try new things, talk openly about fantasies and desires, and explore different ways to increase pleasure.
Don’t be afraid to laugh together or even make mistakes; it will only bring you closer as a couple.
I really wish you the best and hope that your days of sexual dissatisfaction are now behind you.
Because, sex is good!!!