Marriage is a very unique institution.
Even though this God-ordained institution has stood fast through generations, certain dynamics around it have been largely subject to societal dictates and trends.
One such is divorce.
Divorce rates have peaked over time, and from a pattern of men mostly initiating divorce, the dynamics have shifted.
It is said that seventy percent of divorces are initiated by women.
Wild, isn’t it?
You may be wondering why this is so.
Is this caused by societal norms, gender role dynamics, or even gender differences?
This is what we aim to dissect in this blog post today.
Come along as we examine the reasons women initiate divorce more than men.
11 Famous Reasons Women Initiate Divorce More Than Men
1. More financial independence
“The place of a woman is in the kitchen” was commonly told young girls in Africa to condition them to embrace their fate as homemakers and nothing more.
This conditioning usually started early on, and you’d find many women living fully dependent on their husbands because he was the breadwinner.
Well, times have changed, and with education and technological advancement, more women are empowered and rising up in their careers and businesses.
No longer at the mercy of the male gender financially, women who are dissatisfied in their marriages may decide to audaciously take a walk because they are financially independent.
In the past, when women were disgruntled in their marriages, they’d manage because of the fear of survival.
Many would “stay for the children” because they lacked the means to cater to them without the man’s input.
Sadly, some women lost their lives to domestic violence for this reason.
However, with women becoming their own bosses in the marketplace, sitting on boards, flying high in their careers, and excelling in their craft, this narrative is fast changing.
One resultant effect of this is that when she can no longer deal, she initiates divorce.
2. Changing gender roles
The only constant thing in life is change.
This is true in this context, too, because traditional roles are being redefined as times change.
Formerly, it was seen as overambitious for a woman to desire to sit with the male folk, but times have changed, and women are not only sitting at the table, but they are heading conversations and making decisions at the table.
We have seen more women ready to pay the price for a successful career or business and more men ready to hold the forte as homeschooling dads or working remotely.
This means that there is a difference in the defined gender roles of the past, and this also affects the expectations of individuals in marriages.
Perhaps this is also why women initiate divorce more than men.
3. Emotional dissatisfaction
Marriage is a large edifice that takes a lot of intentional work and sacrifice to build.
One of the investments of marriage is emotional, and in times past, when women were relegated to traditional roles and child care, they were more emotionally available for the home front.
They were the backbone of the homes.
This does not in any way imply that they were happier, however with more career and work demands on the female gender, most women desire more partnership in marriage.
When they don’t get it, they may initiate divorce.
Someone once joked that the women in our generation are not as strong and resilient as our mothers maritally.
He argued that the women in the past were resilient and, against all odds, held down the home front, some at the price of their lives.
While his observation is true in a sense, there are different factors that come into play now.
Women are more enlightened, and when the chunk of the emotional investment of the marriage is laid on them, they might take a walk.
Similarly, when their emotional needs are not being met, they may initiate a divorce and seek happiness elsewhere.
4. Communication issues
One pillar of a healthy marriage is communication, and the female gender absolutely thrives on it.
If you don’t believe me, check, and you will find that one of the easiest ways to get a woman to fall for you is through words.
It is generally believed that women are moved by words and men are moved by sight.
More than getting her to fall for you, communication remains one non-negotiable pillar of a relationship.
Women need communication to thrive.
Have you ever wondered why a man would give you a brief and concise summary while a woman would give you details?
This is because that is how they are wired.
Women often file for divorce if this is lacking in the relationship.
Sometimes, it is not about being talkative, but it’s about women needing their feelings and opinions valued and heard in a marriage rather than being sidelined or silenced by a partner’s stonewalling or disinterest.
5. Infidelity
Adultery is the chief leading cause of divorce, and emotional affairs also fall into this category.
For some women, infidelity is the last straw that breaks the proverbial camel’s back.
If he dares cheat, she is out.
This is different from how it used to be in the past when women suffered in silence, and some even covered the clandestine activities of their husbands.
On the other hand, maybe there is an infidelity issue with the female gender, too, because there seems to be an all-time high in married women cheating.
Sometimes the issue isn’t even the man, it is the woman who in spite of being married desires to be a “single pringle” and be desired by other men.
If such a woman feels caged by a husband who is not accommodating of her excesses enough, she may initiate a divorce to gain freedom once again.
6. Domestic violence
Domestic abusers are monsters!
It is unfortunate that the statistics for this have increased over time, and while it isn’t particularly peculiar to only one gender, women are more at risk of being abused physically.
Well, there is a spotlight on this societal menace, and more women are speaking up, and many are fleeing their abusers to start afresh.
There are many nongovernmental and governmental organizations or support groups now shielding and helping victims of domestic violence heal.
Formerly, divorce was tagged as “a woman’s inability to keep her home,” especially when the underlying cause is domestic violence.
Now, women who bail out are considered brave, and there are systems in place that support their rehabilitation and mental health.
This is why more women initiate divorce than men; they are largely the abused gender in cases of domestic violence.
A word of advice if you are experiencing any form of domestic violence…. “please, leave to live.”
7. Child support
More women initiate divorce than men because certain aspects of the law favor their decision to move on.
Deciding to divorce your partner is a very serious decision, and one of the holdbacks to becoming a single mom (in a case where she has kids) is child care and support.
However, the laws of different countries allow for women to be paid child support in divorce cases.
The couple is also to share their assets equally.
8. Feminism
Another reason for the higher rate of women initiating divorce is due to the rise of feminism.
Feminism has empowered women to make their own choices and stand up for their rights, including the right to leave a marriage that is no longer serving them.
With more access to education and career opportunities, women are less dependent on men for financial stability and can confidently seek independence through divorce.
9. Social media pressures
In today’s society, social media plays a big role in shaping our perceptions and expectations.
Many couples may feel pressure to present their marriage as perfect on social media, leading to increased strain and tension in the relationship.
This can contribute to the decision to end the marriage, as it becomes difficult to maintain this facade of happiness.
Apart from that, reading stories of women who have ended their unhappy marriages and started new lives can also inspire others to do the same.
10. Education and career opportunities
One of the most significant factors contributing to the increase in divorce rates among women is access to education and career opportunities.
As more and more women are pursuing higher education and joining the workforce, they become less dependent on men for financial stability.
This gives them the confidence to seek independence through divorce, knowing that they have the skills and means to support themselves.
Moreover, a fulfilling career can also provide a sense of purpose and empowerment for women, making them less likely to stay in an unhappy marriage.
Really, women who find fulfillment in their careers are more likely to have a positive outlook on life and may not see divorce as a failure but rather as an opportunity for growth and self-discovery.
That’s why I encourage women to get a life beyond their marriage.
I don’t pray that any woman experiences divorce, but it happens, and in those situations, it’s important for women to have their own sense of identity and purpose.
It can also offer a distraction from the emotional turmoil and help maintain a sense of routine and normalcy.
Also importantly, having a career can also serve as an example for children.
It teaches them that women are capable of achieving success and independence on their own terms.
This not only promotes gender equality but also empowers future generations to break free from traditional gender roles and expectations.
11. Change in societal norms
Societal norms play a big role in shaping our beliefs and behaviors.
In the past, divorce was heavily stigmatized, especially for women.
Women were expected to stay married no matter the circumstances, even if it meant staying in an unhappy or abusive relationship.
However, with more women in the workforce and gaining financial independence, there has been a shift in societal norms surrounding divorce.
Women are no longer seen as failures or outcasts for choosing to leave a marriage that is not fulfilling or healthy.
This change in societal norms not only benefits women but also promotes healthier relationships and families overall.
This list isn’t exhaustive, but it gives a good idea of why women initiate divorce more than men.
Divorce isn’t child’s play; I don’t wish it on anyone, but sometimes, it’s necessary for one’s physical and mental well-being.