I don’t think any woman wants to share a man with someone else, and for some reason, some women end up being the other woman.
Being the ‘other woman‘ is a tough road.
You’re caught up in a whirlwind of emotions, and among the hardest parts is not knowing exactly where you stand.
Your heart aches with questions like,
”Does he love me?”
”Does he love his wife more than me?”
”Am I doing the right thing?”
”When will this end?”
”Will I always be the other woman?”
Being involved in a romantic triangle is confusing and emotionally draining, and when you’re unsure about the feelings of the man in the middle, it’s crazier.
Regardless of the promises he’s been making to you about leaving his wife, here are signs he loves his wife even much more than you:
12 Vivid Signs He Loves His Wife
1. He Always Puts His Wife First
One clear sign he loves his wife more than you is if he consistently prioritizes her needs over yours.
For example, if you’re both scheduled to meet up, but he cancels last minute because his wife needs something, even something trivial.
Or you’ve noticed that he always seems to be available for her whenever she calls, but when you reach out to him, he’s invariably busy or takes his time to return your calls.
This pattern of him always putting his wife’s needs first shows that she remains his top priority, and he values her happiness more than yours,
2. He Only Sees You in Secret
Naturally, extramarital affairs are shrouded in secrecy, but some men are so in love with the other woman that even though they won’t leave their wives, they are comfortable enough to be seen with her out in public.
But if he only treats you like his dirty little secret, it’s a clear sign that his love for his wife outweighs whatever passion and chemistry you share.
And he doesn’t want to jeopardize his marriage by being caught with you.
3. He Keeps You Away from His Personal Life
Even if your interactions with him are secret, what about him?
Does that mean you shouldn’t know anything meaningful about him?
So if he’s consistently keeping you at arm’s length from his personal life, that’s a distinct sign he loves his wife more than you.
He doesn’t introduce you to his friends, avoids talking about his family, and you’ve never met any of his colleagues.
He talks about his life in vague terms, never delving into too much detail.
He doesn’t share personal struggles or triumphs with you, and you’ve never really seen where he lives.
It’s like he’s intentionally creating a barrier between his world and you.
He’s trying to protect his wife and their relationship from the intrusion of his affair, showing that he values his marriage more than the relationship he has with you.
4. He Often Talks About His Wife
If he’s truly in love with you, he would be focused on you and your relationship rather than incessantly mentioning his wife.
It doesn’t even occur to him how talking about his wife would make you feel, yet he can’t stop talking about her, their experiences as a couple, her quirks, her admirable qualities, or even their arguments.
It’s a subconscious habit that reveals his deep emotional connection with her, and often, it’s much deeper than the one he has with you.
So, if his wife is a recurring theme in your discussions, it’s a valid sign that he loves his wife more than you.
5. He Doesn’t Plan a Future with You
Another telltale sign that he loves his wife more than you is his reluctance or total avoidance of discussing a future, especially of your relationship, with you.
It’s pretty obvious when all your time together is spent in the present, with no talk about what lies ahead because he doesn’t envision you in his future.
His inability to weave you into his long-term plans is proof that his primary emotional attachment and loyalty are still with his wife, not you.
6. He Takes His Wedding Vows Seriously
Ironic, isn’t it?
How can a man who stepped out on his wife take his wedding vows seriously?
Well, even though he might have strayed and is getting involved in an affair, he might somehow still take his vows seriously.
So, there are lines he will not cross even when he’s with you.
For example, he may avoid certain activities with you that he considers a direct violation of his vows, such as not spending the night with you or not celebrating specific occasions like anniversaries or holidays together.
He may affirm his commitment to his wife by mentioning his vows in conversations, subtly reminding you and himself that he is, in fact, married.
In fact, he might sometimes express guilt or discomfort when he’s with you.
He loves his wife, and he knows being with you is all shades of wrong, no matter how good it feels.
Thus, if he sees his relationship with you as a deviation from his commitment and not a replacement for it, he still loves his wife.
7. He Often Compares You to His Wife
If being with you is more satisfying than being with his wife, why would he keep comparing you to her in a positive light?
It’s one thing to admire a certain quality she has; it’s another to make subtle and direct comparisons between you two.
He might even outright say that his wife has qualities that you don’t, so you often find yourself in the shadow of his wife.
This goes beyond him simply not wanting to let go of her; this is a sign he still loves and admires his wife, even though he is with you.
8. His Financial Commitments Are Towards His Wife/Family
Where/what/who you spend your money is where your heart lies.
If his financial commitments are mainly towards his wife and family, it’s clear he loves them more than you.
Maybe he’s the one helping out with payments for his family or taking care of their everyday needs, but you hardly ever get even a token gift from him.
He might be generous with you here and there, but there’s a clear disparity between the financial commitments he makes to his wife and family and to you.
Heck, you might even be the one spending on him!
9. He Doesn’t Want to Hurt His Wife
Yes, he may enjoy spending time with you, but if he doesn’t want to do anything whatsoever to hurt his wife, he still cares for her deeply.
His guilt and fear of causing her pain is a sure sign that he loves her more than pleasing you.
10. His Actions Don’t Match His Words
He may tell you he loves you more, but if his actions consistently show otherwise, he’s just trying to keep you interested.
Actions speak louder than words, and his behavior toward his wife is more indicative of his true feelings.
11. He Is Reluctant to Leave His Wife
If, despite your persuasions, he is reluctant to leave his wife, it’s an undeniable sign he loves her.
No matter how difficult the circumstances may be, his unwillingness to end his marriage shows where his true feelings are invested.
Know this, and know peace!
12. He Returns to His Wife After Fights
Couples fight, even extramarital ones, but if after an argument with you, he seeks solace or comfort in his wife’s company, it’s a strong sign he still belongs to her world.
It shows that he considers his wife as his emotional anchor, the person he turns to in times of distress.
Dear sis, being the ‘other woman’ is a precarious position to be in, fraught with uncertainties and potential heartbreak.
I don’t know what circumstances led you to be the other woman, but if these signs resonate with your situation, wake up and smell the coffee.
Your lover may love you, but it’s clear that he loves his wife more.
It’s time to look out for yourself and move on.
You deserve better.