In a world where marriage and relationship content are in high demand and always get a lot of clicks, you’d think marriage is for everybody.
Yes, an unbelievably high number of people alive today either have, will be, or are married.
The satisfaction and many other benefits that come with being married are ones that many people desire, and there’s nothing wrong with that.
However, as many as the people who desire marriage are, best believe that there still are people who are not meant to be married.
Surprising but true, marriage is not for everybody.
If you have ever wondered if marriage is really for you, chances are it is not, but let’s not be hasty to conclude.
The signs below will help you confirm.
10 Glaring Signs Marriage Is Not For You
1. You do not desire it
I mentioned earlier that many people desire marriage and everything that comes with it.
From as little as five years old, I was already picturing myself getting married and having my own home, even though I didn’t know much about it then, and I’m sure it’s the same for many people as well.
You may notice that things are different in your case; you do not desire marriage, it does not tickle your fancy, and it’s generally foreign to you.
You find that you do not share people’s sentiments and excitement when they talk about weddings and wanting to get married.
Even if you may have liked it and considered it when you were little, as time passed and you began to understand yourself better, you became detached from the concept and reality of marriage.
This may not even be a response to trauma or anything like that; you just don’t desire it.
That can be a strong sign that marriage is not for you, which is okay.
2. You can’t commit
Try to picture for a minute a marriage without commitment.
It will be spelled D I S A S T E R.
Perhaps you have noticed that you have commitment issues and can’t stay with one person for a long time.
Even with one person, you do not want to be devoted.
You are as unstable as the wind and prefer having open relationships or changing partners randomly.
If this is you, then marriage is very likely not for you because the entirety of marriage is built on commitment.
3. Marriage talks never interest you
One of the ways that I love to spend my time is by watching YouTube videos.
I have watched tons of them and noticed that videos centered around marriage and weddings often get the highest likes, comments, and shares.
A YouTuber could post videos about her career, skincare routine, or neighborhood and get only a few views.
But the day she gets married and posts videos about her husband and her marriage, her views skyrocket, and you see tons of comments.
The numbers don’t lie; people love marriage talks.
So, if a person is nonchalant and uninterested talks about marriage, it can be a strong indicator that the person is not meant to be married.
Usually, the things we are meant to do connect with us deeply.
For instance, when someone talks about that thing, it strikes a chord in us, and we want to listen more.
I am inadvertently saying that if marriage and wedding talks do not interest you, it is possibly because it’s not meant for you.
Nothing within you resonates with it.
4. You’ve tried it many times and failed
Sometimes, failing at something repeatedly is not a sign that you need to try harder.
It could be a sign that you need to give up because it’s not for you.
The challenge lies in knowing the difference.
If you have tried marriage many times and it didn’t work, you may want to take some time off and reconsider if this is a journey that was meant for you or not.
Just because everyone is getting married does not mean you must get married.
You can live a happy, full, and wholesome life without marriage.
5. You don’t want to share your space
Hear me out; I have to explain this properly so that you don’t get it twisted because I love my personal space and do not love sharing it, but I know that marriage is for me.
However, I am preparing to make compromises when the time comes.
If you love your personal space and are unwilling to share, then marriage is not for you.
With marriage, your partner will be all up in your personal space, and let’s not even talk about when you begin to have kids together.
In fact, you have no personal space with kids because children, especially toddlers, want to be everywhere with you.
If you let them, toddlers will go into the restroom with you while you’re doing the number two.
What I am saying, in essence, is that marriage allows someone else to invade your space, but you’re also invading your space, so it’s a two-way thing.
So if you’re averse to making compromises in this area and the many other areas in marriage where you will need to make sacrifices, marriage isn’t for you.
6. You’re not willing to make the effort
When people say that marriage is hard work, they do not say it to discourage people from getting married,
Instead, they say it to get their minds prepared for the realities that come with being married.
Marriage involves living with one person for the rest of your life, getting to understand them, and living with them.
Understanding each other’s personalities, managing each other’s flaws, and doing life together.
Life on its own can be difficult sometimes; now add that to trying to understand your partner and making things work even when you both have varying opinions.
It can be a lot of work sometimes, to be honest.
You may just find yourself uninterested in investing that effort and hard work.
Nothing in you wants to even put in the work.
This can be a sign that marriage is not for you.
Recognizing this is good because it means you’re self-aware and not going into something you’re unprepared for.
7. You don’t see the purpose and value
Marriage is an institution that holds so much value and purpose.
It is such a wonderful union that has the potential to become so many beautiful things, but not everybody sees it this way.
Some people say marriage is just a random partnership that isn’t so important.
It is often said that “when the use of a thing is unknown, abuse is inevitable.”
When you don’t see the proposed value of marriage, you won’t respect it, which can set you up for failure even before you get into it.
It may not be for you if you don’t consider marriage valuable and purposeful.
You can do many other things with your life that hold so much purpose and value to you.
8. You don’t want kids
With marriage, whether or not you intend or want to have kids, having them is always a possibility.
Sometimes, you may think they won’t come or plan for them not to come, and then they show up like a surprise package.
If you do not desire to have children or the idea of having them annoys you, then maybe marriage is not for you.
Don’t get me wrong, there are great marriages even without kids, but for this to happen, both parties need to agree that this is what they want.
They also need to have some level of assurance that one person will not change their mind along the way.
9. You don’t want to be accountable to anyone
“It’s my life, and I’ll do what I want… “
If these lyrics by the Animals in their song “It’s My Life” are the theme of your life, marriage may not be for you.
In a healthy marriage, you don’t lose your freedom or individuality, but you definitely can not live like you used to when you were not married.
Accountability is an integral part of marriage because both parties have to carry each other along and consider each other in their decisions and plans.
If you don’t see yourself doing that with anyone, it’s probably because you don’t see yourself getting married, too.
10. You’re content with your life as it is
Maybe you’re just perfectly okay with how your life is now as a single person and don’t want anything more.
This does not mean that people who want to get married are unhappy with their lives as singles.
For them, while they are happy being single, they know that marriage will bring them another level of happiness, like an icing on the cake, and so they want it.
However, for you, things are different; you don’t see yourself being happy in marriage because you can feel your happiness now, and it’s all you’ve ever wanted.
It can be a sign that marriage is not for you and you’re meant to remain single or just in relationships.
At the end of the day, we are deeply spiritual and soulish, and we can tell what resonates with us on the inside.
No matter how popular marriage continues to be or how wonderful it is, the truth remains that it is not for everybody.
If you have begun identifying the signs that marriage is not for you, this article must have helped bring you more clarity.
Take some time to analyze your feelings and be confident in your journey.
As long as you are living a good life and being the best version of yourself, walking in the path designed for you, your life is not missing anything.