The toughest relationship breakups are often the ones with a child or more in the mix.
Both partners are likely to find themselves in a fix while considering the best interests of the child.
In my opinion, it’s easier to walk out of a childless relationship.
Moving on from the relationship could be quite trying.
However, nothing lasts forever.
Your baby mama could still be into you for a while after the breakup, but she may sooner or later get over you.
Depending on the circumstances involved, she turns off every romantic feeling she ever had towards you while just letting you play your role as a father. Or not.
Therefore, in order not to get your hopes high in anticipation of a possible reconciliation, here are some signs your baby mama is over you you should look out for:
11 Signs Your Baby Mama is Over You
-
She gives no chance for reconciliatory talks or meet-ups.
If your baby mama sees no need for discussions that are geared towards how things can get back to normal between you two, chances are that she has moved on and will never consider getting back with you.
If she does everything possible to prevent any reconciliatory move you make, she probably loathes the idea of being your woman.
Perhaps all she wants ever to be is your baby mama, and what went down between you two that made her so can not be repeated.
2. She’s dating other men
If your baby mama is actively dating, that’s a sign that she has no plans of reconciling with you.
She confidently and unashamedly talks about her dates.
You might be tempted to assume she is dating just to rile you up or invoke jealousy in you.
I won’t deny the truth in that possibility.
However, it could also be a sign that you have been romantically replaced.
So, if she responds to your advances with contempt, maybe it’s time to accept that she has moved on and won’t be getting back with you.
-
She only reaches out to you about the child
If the only thing that makes your baby mama call or text you is your child, never about herself or you, then it is a sign that the only need she has of you henceforth is for you to play your role as the father of the child you both have.
She stops asking you for any form of help or support for herself.
In this case, it is apparent that her sole concern is the child’s welfare, compelling her to maintain contact with you.
Maybe if she had her way, she would delete or block your number.
4. She never reaches out to you about the child
To take the moving on to a further extent, your baby mama may prefer to never even involve you in the affairs of the child.
This is a sure sign that she is over you.
She gives you the, ‘We do not need you’ vibes and rejects your support.
She makes decisions independent of your opinions and does not even give you room to air them.
You do not need a soothsayer to tell you that, in this case, there is no love lost between you two.
It is over.
5. She stops showing interest in your life
If your erstwhile lover and baby mama ceases to be interested in your daily activities, whether you are dating someone else or not, she’s unbothered.
She does not care to know details about your job, your friends, your family members, etc.
Things that would previously make her ask you questions now seem none of her business; she’s probably gotten over what you shared.
It’s all in the past for her.
6. She excommunicates your family members and friends
When your baby mama cuts ties with everyone that was affiliated with you while you were an item, it becomes glaring that she is being intentional about moving on and blotting out the past from her memory.
She does not honor your family’s invitations to social events as she did in the past, and neither do you get invited to hers.
She knows that if she has to keep interacting with your family and friends, it could make her feel uncomfortable.
She does not want to be reminded of the relationship she shared with you hence why she is doing whatever is necessary to create a total detachment from anyone associated with you.
It’s time to accept that things have changed and understand that your baby mama wants nothing more to do with you.
7. She denies you access to her and your child
If your baby mama does everything she can to prevent you from having access to your child, then it is clear that she does not want to have anything to do with you, and she is not considering a reconciliation.
She will make excuses for why you can’t see your baby, and she won’t give a clear reason as to why.
Everyone knows it’s not fair for a father to be kept away from their children, so if she’s gone to this length, something is wrong.
8. She changes the surname of the child to hers
If your baby mama changes the last name of the child you both have together to hers, this is the most obvious sign that she has not only gotten over you, she also desires that your child does the same.
At the risk of being tagged a pessimist at this point, I daresay that I see no light at the end of this tunnel.
9. She emphatically tells you to move on
If your baby mama tells you in clear terms to move on with your life without her in the picture, it’s best to believe she is not kidding.
She probably has done the same, and she doesn’t want you hanging around believing that she would come around one day.
10. She changes her lifestyle
Some of the activities we engage in, the places we visit, the jobs we do, the hobbies we take up, our dress sense, etc., are sometimes influenced by our life partners.
However, when people are moving on from a relationship that went south, chances are that they cut themselves some slack and make decisions solely based on their own desires or their new partner, if there are any.
The change of lifestyle is often in preparation for the next phase of their life without you in the picture.
So if you notice that your baby mama no longer wears her weaves the way you loved them and she is now into wigs, it could be a hint that she has gotten over you and, as such, no longer seeks to please you.
11. She gets married to someone else
When a person is over their ex, they usually don’t want to waste any more time and move on with their life.
If you notice that your baby mama has gotten married to someone else, there’s no doubt that she is really done with you.
She may even be using the marriage as a way to prove to you that she can find someone else and doesn’t need you.
LAST WORDS
The probability that any of the signs discussed above is applicable to your own situation depends on the factors that led to the breakup and how bad the breakup was.
It’s important for you to know if she has gotten over you or not so that you can know how best to proceed in life and make appropriate decisions about you and your child.
If she’s over you because you hurt her too much, you should also take the time to reflect on your actions and find ways to make things right if possible.
So that you can be a father to your child even if you can’t be a partner to her.
And if after she has forgiven you, she is still over you, respect her wishes with dignity and be a responsible father to your child.