Even though pregnancy is a personal and unique experience, you can still learn from other people’s experiences.
Learning from people’s experiences will help you to prepare better because you’ll know what to expect and not feel like you’re alone in your world.
Honestly, some experiences I had when I was pregnant with my daughter really shocked me, and I wished I knew a little about what to expect.
Maybe I thought pregnancy for me would be a walk in the park.
Well, I wish I knew the following:
10 Things I wish people told me about pregnancy
1. That first trimester could be so distressing
Maybe if anyone had told me how distressing first trimester could be, I’d have said they were exaggerating. Maybe I wouldn’t have believed them.
But experiencing it myself has helped me to be empathetic towards women in their first trimester because I can so relate.
Some women are lucky to have a smooth first trimester but mine hit me like a tsunami. I wasn’t prepared for it at all. I never thought first trimester would be the sickest I’d ever be.
Maybe if someone had warned me about first trimester, I’d have been better prepared. Or not.
The nausea, vomiting, extreme fatigue, loss of appetite, hypersensitivity to smells, excessive salivation, fever, horrible aftertaste, annoying extreme hunger etc. were the most distressing combinations of feelings I ever had to deal with.
Maybe if I’d been told, I’d be scared.
Anyway, first trimester took me by surprise. I never knew I could have it so bad.
I’d imagined myself pregnant and happy, not sick and distressed.
A lot of women don’t like talking about how the pains of the first trimester.
Some don’t want to be called ingrates for not appreciating the gift of the little wonder growing in them.
Because there are uncountable women praying and wishing to experience the ‘joy’ you’re complaining about.
People need to understand that talking about the pain of pregnancy doesn’t mean you don’t appreciate the gift of motherhood. And denying reality doesn’t make the pain go away.
We just want to let off some steam. It makes us feel better.
Kindly allow us!
2. That pregnancy could make you look different
I wish someone had told me that pregnancy could make me look so different….
Ugly is the word.
Especially in the third trimester.
The swollen nose, swollen lips, swollen legs, swollen face, baby fat….oh
I looked so different!
Yes, a beautiful being is growing inside of you, so your own beauty needs to be sucked. Literally.
You don’t even want to look at yourself in the mirror some days.
This doesn’t apply to everyone though. Some women are lucky to remain the same throughout pregnancy.
The good news is that you won’t look that way forever. It’s just a matter of time. And some discipline (to completely get rid of baby fat).
I wondered plenty of times if I’d ever look the same way pre-pregnancy.
But I did. Even looked better except for some belly pouch which I’m determined to get rid of.
I really wish I didn’t bother my head about my looks.
3. That pregnancy involves a great mix of anxiety and excitement
When you’re pregnant, you experience some moments of excitement like finding out the sex of your baby, feeling and seeing your baby’s movement, imagining what your little one would look like and looking forward to seeing him/her.
Despite your excitement, there are many anxieties you’ll deal with.
You worry about things not going well with the baby, labour and recovery.
You worry about things not turning out the way you expect.
A little anxiety is quite normal anyway, and things usually turn out well at the end of the day.
4. That Google would become my best friend
I don’t know about others but I searched the depths of Google for some comfort and answers.
Sometimes, I typed things like,
“Pregnancy is hard”
“Tired of being pregnant”
“When does morning sickness completely disappear?”
“Why am I always hungry in pregnancy?”
One thing I found comforting was reading about other women’s experiences.
I realized I wasn’t alone in my misery, and that was so encouraging.
Talk about misery loves company.
5. Pregnancy is a very personal experience and solutions proferred by others, including Google might not work for you
In searching for answers and relief, people, including Google, tell you, this works, that works.
For instance, almost every page on Google is filled with the same remedy for nausea.
Ginger + Lemon drink
Chew peppermint gum etc.
But you realize that these things might not work for you.
Even wristbands didn’t get rid of my nausea.
Nothing worked for my excessive salivation and spitting.
Nothing ever worked!!! For me anyway.
Eventually, you’ll have to endure whatever it is you’re experiencing because there’s no recipe for relief.
The perfect relief from whatever symptoms you’re experiencing comes when your baby is out.
6. Pregnancy/Childbirth is an adventure and there might be nothing like ‘planned birth’
With pregnancy, you can’t always tell what will happen next and how things will go especially during delivery.
While it’s good to plan your delivery, things can take a different turn.
It’s important to be open-minded enough to make the best decision for you and your baby if it comes to that.
Most women prefer and plan for a vaginal birth but sometimes, some would end up having an emergency cesarean section.
Pregnancy/childbirth is really an adventure you should be flexible enough to enjoy because, at the end of the day, things will go right for you and your baby.
7. That hunger and eating could become tiring
I’m a sucker for good food and I love cooking and trying new recipes.
You’d think that extreme hunger and eating almost every two hours in pregnancy would be fun.
I actually got tired of having to eat every three hours.
I had no choice than to eat because hunger worsens nausea and fatigue.
8. That I’d Get Tired of Being Pregnant
Believe me, I got tired of being pregnant especially at the end of the second trimester.
Even though I enjoyed feeling my baby kick in the womb, I looked forward to seeing her kick in real life.
The only date in my head was my EDD.
I so looked forward to it like my life depended on it.
I just wanted to be ‘free’.
9. The Vivid Dreams
Oh, I never heard of pregnancy vivid dreams until I had them.
Not only do they happen every time you close your eyes to sleep, but they are also usually annoying. So annoying that I dreaded sleeping because I knew the dreams would surely come.
I so looked forward to delivery so I could enjoy some minutes of sleep without having bizarre dreams.
10. You’ll Forget How it Feels to be Normal
In the midst of dealing with pregnancy and its symptoms, I completely forgot how it felt to be normal.
I tried to remember my life before pregnancy, I just couldn’t.
I couldn’t remember how it felt to live each day without nausea, horrible aftertaste, and fatigue.
Honestly, mothers are strong creatures!
Even though pregnancy is not a walk in the park for some of us, our babies are worth all the pain and the stress, so much so that we don’t mind going through it all over again.
Although for me, I’ve decided to go through it just one more time after which I’m done! ?
People don’t believe me when I say this and they’re making me to start doubting my decision.
I hope this article will help me to stick to my decision. ?
I asked real moms what they wished they knew before they got pregnant.
Read and enjoy their responses below:
“I wish I knew that vomiting and nausea could not be stopped. They claim it can be managed. My hormones raged like a wild storm. Gynaecologist said you don’t determine the level, your hormones determine it. I vomited and spat about for 5/6months terribly.”_ Halle
“If only I knew I would vomit for a complete 9 months.
I was sick and I had to pretend at some point that I was fine just to avoid drips and injections.
I really hope and pray that my next pregnancy will not bring me so much pain and discomfort and that I will be able to tolerate fruits as much as I want.”_ Susan
“That “morning sickness” is not for morning alone, it’s more like “till you deliver sickness”_ Udofa
“That eating for two would make me end up with a big baby.”_ Omowumi
“I wish I knew I would turn very black, wish I knew I would no longer wear any of my pre-pregnancy clothes, I wish I knew how labour pain was.”_ Praise
“That my body will NEVER remain the same again.”_ Jane
“That I’ll probably not get my body back. That one minute I’m fine, the next minute I’m a truckload of so many contradicting feelings and emotions (both good and bad). That my favourite smell or food can suddenly become my worst. That even after all the labour pains and CS pains, I’ll still come back and have another baby. I’m kidding, I already knew this one.”_ Sekemi
“I wish I had known that watching my diet wouldn’t guarantee a smaller sized baby.”_ Winifred
“That it’s called morning sickness, afternoon weakness and night sickness.”_ Olajumoke
“I wish I knew that during vaginal delivery you may likely pass faeces too.”_ Blessing
“Nobody told me about not being able to eat for the duration of the pregnancy. No one told me that pregnancy could change your eyesight and leave you struggling to see properly. No one told me that I would have to live with back pain for as long as forever. No one told me that I would have a baby pouch forever. All these I still struggle with now and my babies are 8 and 3.”_ Tolu
“That breastfeeding would be painful. All that mother and baby derive pleasure from it went out of the window the first one week. SCAM!”_ Freda
“That pregnancy will lower my libido. With my first child it increased it but with this one, don’t even come near me.”_ Adenike
“Nobody told me my libido would be on another level. It was over the roof but I love it!”_ Olawande
“I wish I took my drugs.”_ Damilola
Pregnancy is different for each woman. Some women are fortunate to not experience any unpleasant symptom whatsoever.
For instance these three women:
“Different strokes for different folks, they say and I bet it’s true. Fortunately for me, I didn’t experience any of these. No morning sickness, no nausea, no vomiting and not a single spit till I put to bed, no special cravings ( I cooked throughout and ate the food), no smell irritated me (lol, I wore perfume till I delivered).
No swollen ankle and no sleeping/dozing during the day (I worked 8 to 6 Monday to Friday till few days before delivery).
I grew from size 8 to 12 and back to 10 after delivery (less than two months now).
I added 15kg throughout the journey dropped 10kg already. (Baby was 3.5kg at birth)
I got tired of sleeping on both sides and wished I could lie on my back or tummy.
Vaginal delivery is underrated, you will understand why I said so if you had a deep episiotomy.
But no one told me breastfeeding and sleepless nights could be this tiring.”_ Oluwamayokun
“I am really grateful to God. I had no morning sickness, no vomiting or spitting. I didn’t have any craving per se. Even labour pain wasn’t so bad for me, I dilated very fast. Breastfeeding was really sweet but it tickled me a lot.”_ Jade
“Pregnancy was beautiful for me. I guess it was because I had every moment to myself and zero stress. But labour pain was hell! I almost removed the hospital burglary. The pain was indescribable!”_ Damilola
This article is not to scare you if you’re looking to be a mom.
It’s just to prepare your mind and to learn from the experiences of other women.
You can see that almost everyone had a different thing to say about pregnancy.
You have to experience it to tell.
Hopefully, yours will be a sweet experience.
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Thursday 28th of May 2020
Vomiting, smell sensitivity and fatigue are all so distressing. How I wish I have more time to stay in bed and get a lot of rest. But because I am a working mom, it is always a struggle for me to wake-up early from Monday to Friday. I always pray that the Lord will sustain the strength I need for each day. He was faithful indeed. Though I cannot escape from all of this pregnancy issues but I am here overcoming it.
Friday 12th of June 2020
Awww. Congratulations on your pregnancy. I feel for you because I have been there twice and I agree it's no fun. I guess I'm lucky to be working from home, so it makes it a little bearable. Hang in there, you'll have your bundle of joy in your hands soon.