Words may lie… but these two things can tell you everything about how a man feels about you: how he looks at you and kisses you.
Kissing is one of the most intimate acts of affection.
It requires the highest levels of vulnerability to engage in, yet you don’t seem to notice or acknowledge how vulnerable you are.
Let me give an analogy to explain what I mean by this…
You most likely won’t find anyone who worries about what their breath smells like when they are kissing.
You may worry about it later but, not while you are at it.
This is the level of vulnerability that kissing encourages.
Little wonder most guys love kissing.
It’s a way to be vulnerable without actually saying anything.
People usually have different ways of kissing, which reflects their feelings and emotions.
However, it is a noticeable trend that guys like to kiss aggressively.
This trend is what intrigues many and has given rise to the question this article intends to answer…
“Why do guys like to kiss aggressively?”
Come along with me as we attempt to get some answers to this mystery.
Why Do Guys Like To Kiss Aggressively?–12 Reasons
1. It’s a way to express passion and desire
As a kid, I used to think that kissing was only a preamble for one thing… A romp in the bedroom between partners.
Now, I know better.
There are different types of kisses and they all signify different things.
When a guy kisses you aggressively, it can often be a reflection of strong passion and desire.
Guys like to kiss aggressively whenever they are taken over by strong emotions that cannot be accurately expressed with words or by light kisses.
Many guys have issues communicating their emotions, and when you add really strong emotions to the mix, they just end up feeling out of their depths.
Kissing aggressively may be the one way they can communicate what they feel at that moment.
2. He is confident
Generally, I believe that people always attribute assertive behaviors to confident individuals.
So, in a corporate environment, a man must learn to shake hands firmly with contemporaries and superiors to reflect confidence.
You must note that a firm handshake is not the same as attempting to squash your boss’s hand.
Don’t go around squeezing people’s hands because you want to look confident.
Similar protocols apply to kissing.
When a man kisses a lady tentatively, she may believe he is weak, indecisive, or not confident enough.
This is why guys like to kiss aggressively…
To show they are confident enough to know what they want and go for it.
It shows a level of self-assurance that is comfortable with expressing his desires.
3. He just can’t get enough of you
I remember seeing my secondary school mathematics teacher’s wedding photos and laughing.
The man actually looked like he wanted to swallow his wife’s mouth and I thought in my head…
“Please don’t swallow that fine woman, sir!”
I think I now understand him better.
Sometimes, guys like to kiss aggressively because they can’t seem to get enough of their girlfriends.
It’s a way of expressing desire that can’t be satisfied easily.
In fact, it’s a way of saying, “I don’t think I can ever get enough of you.”
Yeah, he could have said it with his words, but it probably would not have the same effect on her as the kiss.
It’s okay to express your emotions by kissing your girlfriend.
Don’t just try to swallow her like my math teacher!
4. He is naturally intense
Now, there is the part about most guys liking to kiss aggressively.
There is also the option that the guy is naturally intense.
Guys who are naturally intense go about their daily activities with an intensity I envy sometimes.
Sometimes!
They can be too serious most of the time.
If a guy kisses you aggressively, it may be because he is naturally intense and always does things with surprising intensity.
If this is true, you would have noticed it already in how he behaves.
He does everything with such intensity that he may sometimes seem annoying, especially when you can’t understand the reason for the intensity.
But I am sure you understand that he doesn’t intend to be annoying.
It is just a natural reaction to his intensity.
5. He wants to dominate
This is another important reason to consider.
Sometimes, guys like to kiss aggressively to establish control.
This will take a bit of explaining, but stay with me.
Do you remember how the most aggressive male becomes the leader of a pack of wolves?
It applies to human relationships.
The most assertive partner in a relationship controls the relationship.
Due to social conditioning, guys like to always be in control of their relationships.
So, in a bid to fulfill social expectations that the man is the aggressor in romantic or sexual interactions, guys usually like to kiss aggressively.
I know you are tempted to think of it as a power struggle, but it isn’t, for the most part.
Most guys do this unconsciously without really giving it any thought.
6. He wants to intensify pleasure
Almost everyone who has been kissed will agree with me that kissing is a pleasurable activity…
Except for those who have had really terrible experiences with kissing.
My heart goes out to you if you’ve had lousy kissing experiences.
Guys may like to kiss aggressively because they feel like it intensifies the pleasure derived from it.
And for some ladies, it does.
It is a way of releasing pent-up emotional energy and feeling good afterward.
It is usually a response to erotic stimulation, and to get the best out of it, they need to go at it vigorously.
7. He is influenced by the media and peers
For some guys, aggressive kissing is not even something they like.
So why do they do it?
The influence of the media and peers cannot be underestimated.
In movies and TV shows, most steamy scenes are characterized by aggressive kissing and smooching.
It often looks like the actresses derive so much pleasure from being kissed aggressively.
Hence, many guys try to emulate what they have seen on the screens.
For most of us, our education on things like kissing and sex is mainly from the media and peers.
Therefore, if a guy’s friends love to kiss aggressively, he may unconsciously adopt their style.
8. He wants to have sex with you
When a guy kisses you deeply and forcefully, you need to consider the fact that he actually wants to have sex with you.
For many guys, aggressive kissing is usually a foreplay or prelude to other sexual acts or even sex itself.
I once heard a guy boasting to his friends about how he had never kissed a girl that he didn’t have sex with.
I know that people sometimes kiss other people without wanting to go any further than that.
However, if you get swept away by a guy’s aggressive kisses, you may find yourself in a position you don’t want to be in.
So, if you feel the kisses are getting too aggressive, stop him and save yourself the regrets.
9. He doesn’t want to be vulnerable
I know I said kissing can be an incredibly intimate act that requires vulnerability.
However, some guys kiss aggressively to avoid being vulnerable to you.
They really don’t want you to know that, at their core, they are indecisive and insecure.
So, they mask their indecisiveness by kissing aggressively to pretend they are assertive and confident.
Kissing can be intimate only when the two people involved let their real emotions gain expression.
10. He doesn’t know how to kiss
I know you didn’t see this point coming, but most guys kiss aggressively because they don’t even know how to kiss!
Think of your first-ever kiss; how was it?
Kissing is an intimate act but requires skill to be pleasurable to both parties.
There is a way to kiss a woman and draw her in passionately.
Slow and passionate kisses are truly underrated.
Just like my math teacher, who almost swallowed his wife’s mouth all in the name of a kiss, many guys who kiss aggressively lack skill.
It was my math teacher’s first kiss, by the way.
Nigerians like to say, “No be by gra gra,” meaning (it’s not by being forceful).
Some people, while kissing, keep having nose accidents (nose bumps against each other), teeth and tongue fights, and overproduction of saliva… eew!
All of these are knowledge gaps and easy-kissing turn-offs.
Guys who think aggressive kissing is the only way to kiss must update their knowledge.
11. He is selfish
Kissing is meant to be an act of pleasure between two people, but it can easily turn into a chore when one person does it selfishly.
Besides lacking the kissing skill, most guys who kiss aggressively are selfish.
They care only for their own pleasure, and that is why they come on strong.
Before you kiss that lady aggressively, you need to consider if she likes being kissed like that.
What’s her body language like?
Does she feel assaulted rather than loved?
Does she like for you to swallow her tongue and mouth all in the name of a kiss?
Patient and selfless lovers tend to be better kissers because they can bring their partners to the same level of pleasure.
12. It is his personal preference
Ultimately, a person’s preference determines whether he kisses aggressively or not.
Not all guys like to kiss aggressively.
A bunch of others do it for various reasons.
However, some men don’t have any reason for doing it other than the fact that they enjoy it.
How To Deal With Aggressive Kissing Especially If You Don’t Like It
This is an issue that we don’t talk about often enough.
If you don’t like being kissed aggressively by your boyfriend or husband, you should be able to communicate your reservations with them.
Expressing yourself calmly and patiently is the key to dealing with any differences in kissing preferences.
Then, you need to set clear boundaries on what is acceptable based on mutual respect and understanding.
Discuss the level of aggressive kissing you are comfortable with and set boundaries to ensure that the desires of both of you are satisfied.
Ultimately, mutual consent is necessary in a relationship regardless of what guys like to do or not.
Ladies, if you are uncomfortable with something, speak up.
There is a thin line between kissing passionately and just being unnecessarily violent.
Ensure that you are aware when your partner is about to cross this line.
That self-awareness could be what saves you from toxic and abusive behavior.
For the guys, try kissing her softly occasionally.
It’s not every time you need to kiss her like you want to peel the skin off her lips.
There is a lot of pleasure to be had in tender kisses, too.
Try it and thank me later!