Married people love advising single people about marriage like they’re tour guides to paradise.
But behind closed doors, it’s a different story entirely.
I’m not saying it’s all terrible.
But married people have this interesting habit of selling marriage to single people like it’s a luxury vacation package while conveniently leaving out all the fine print.
It’s like those Instagram photos of the Maldives that don’t show you the 18-hour flight, the mosquitoes, or the fact that paradise costs your entire life savings. 😂
The marketing doesn’t always match the reality.
10 Things Married People Lie About to Single People
1. “Marriage Completes You”
This is the biggest lie in the marriage industrial complex.
Married people love telling single people that they’ll finally feel whole or complete once they find their person and get married.
As if you’re walking around as half a human until someone puts a ring on your finger.
Truth is, if you felt incomplete before marriage, you’ll feel incomplete after marriage too, except now you’ve dragged another person into your incompleteness.
Marriage doesn’t fix your insecurities, heal your childhood wounds, or fill the voids in your life.
It just gives you a permanent roommate who now has to deal with all your unresolved issues.
The married people selling you this “you complete me” narrative are often the same ones in therapy trying to figure out why marriage didn’t magically solve all their problems.
2. “We Never Go to Bed Angry”
This one irritates me the most.
I actually went to bed last night, angry with my husband.
“We never go to bed angry; we always resolve everything before sleep.” yen yen yen.
That’s a lie.
Sometimes you absolutely go to bed angry because it’s 2 AM, you’ve been arguing for three hours, nobody’s budging, and you’re both exhausted.
So you turn your backs to each other, build a pillow wall down the middle of the bed, and deal with it tomorrow.
And that’s fine. It’s normal.
Some married people won’t tell you this because admitting that sometimes you sleep next to someone you’re furious with doesn’t fit the “perfect marriage” image they’re trying to project.
3. “Marriage Makes Everything Better”
Oh well…
Marriage amplifies whatever you already have.
If you’re already happy and stable, marriage can make that even better.
But if you’ve got unresolved issues, trust issues, infidelity tendencies, poor communication skills, or incompatibility you’ve been ignoring…
Marriage won’t fix any of that; it’ll just put it under a spotlight with legal paperwork.
Marriage doesn’t make bad relationships good.
It just makes them permanent until you go through the nightmare of divorce.
4. “The Sex Gets Better”
Let me tell you what they’re not saying…
For a lot of married people, sex becomes scheduled and routine.
Heck, some marriages are even sexless.
You’re tired from work, the kids, the bills, the stress of adult life.
There will always be someone who’s always exhausted, someone who has a headache, someone who needs to wake up early, someone who’s just not in the mood.
I’m not saying married sex is horrible for everyone, but it’s definitely not the constant passionate connection married people describe when they’re trying to convince you that marriage is amazing.
Of course, the sex can get better; I think it got better for me.
But it requires every intentionality to make that happen.
That doesn’t mean it’s always bliss.
5. “We Share Everything”
“We have joint accounts!”
“We tell each other everything!”
“No secrets between us!”
”There’s nothing about him/her that I don’t know.”
Lies. Strategic lies.
Most married people have a stash of money their spouse doesn’t know about, clothes hidden in the back of the closet with tags still on, Amazon packages they intercept before their spouse sees them…. hahaha
Some have group chats where they vent about their spouse, friends who know things their partner doesn’t, and some little secrets they’ll take to the grave.
Sometimes, having everything shared all the time is suffocating, and everyone needs something that’s just theirs.
6. “Marriage Is Easy When You’re With the Right Person”
Absolutely not.
Marriage is work even when you’re with the right person.
You’re two different people with different backgrounds, habits, communication styles, and ways of doing things, trying to build one life together.
That requires compromise, patience, difficult conversations, and constant effort.
The right person doesn’t make marriage effortless; they make it worth the effort.
But married people sell this fairy tale that if you marry your soulmate, everything flows naturally with no conflict or struggle.
Then single people get married, hit the first rough patch, and panic, thinking they married the wrong person, because nobody told them that even good marriages require work.
7. “We Do Everything Together”
No, you don’t.
A lot of married people desperately need space from their spouse, but feel guilty admitting it.
They need time alone, time with friends without their spouse tagging along, hobbies their spouse isn’t involved in, and goals they just want to be all about them, not a couple or family thing.
8. “Having Kids Brings You Closer”
Kids are a blessing, but they also expose every crack in your relationship and make you question if you even like each other anymore.
You’re both exhausted, touched out, running on no sleep, dealing with tantrums, and you haven’t had a real conversation that wasn’t about the kids in months.
You’re functioning as co-parents and roommates more than romantic partners.
Date nights become mythical events that happen twice a year if you’re lucky.
Kids are amazing, but pretending they enhance your marriage instead of completely transforming (and often straining) it is dishonest.
9. “We Never Fight About Money”
Most married couples will tell you they’re on the same page financially, and money isn’t an issue.
Meanwhile, financial disagreements are one of the top reasons marriages fall apart.
Someone’s a spender, someone’s a saver.
Someone wants to invest, someone wants to enjoy now.
But nobody wants to admit they fight about money because it makes you look financially unstable or like you married the wrong person.
10. “Marriage Is the Best Decision I Ever Made”
Some people genuinely feel this way, and that’s beautiful.
But a lot of married people say this because they’re supposed to say it, not because they actually mean it.
Some are stuck in a marriage that’s okay but not great, comfortable but not fulfilling.
And they can’t admit that maybe marriage wasn’t the answer they thought it would be, or that they sometimes wonder what life would be like if they’d made different choices.
So they tell single people how amazing marriage is while privately feeling trapped or disappointed.
Marriage is amazing; been doing this for a decade, but it isn’t this perfect fairy tale that solves all your problems and makes life complete.
It’s a legal contract between two imperfect people who are choosing to handle life together, with all the beauty, frustration, joy, and difficulty that comes with that.
It can be wonderful, like I said.
But it can also be hard, boring, frustrating, and completely different from what you expected.
The problem isn’t marriage itself; it’s the false advertising.
If You’re Single,
Don’t let married people pressure you into thinking you’re missing out or incomplete without marriage.
Your life isn’t less valuable or less full just because you’re not married.
And don’t rush into marriage because everyone’s selling it as the ultimate life goal.
Take your time.
Choose wisely.
And know that marriage won’t fix you, complete you, or solve all your problems; it’ll just give you a partner to face life’s problems with.
If You’re Married,
Stop lying to single people about how perfect marriage is.
Be honest about the reality… the good parts AND the hard parts.
Single people deserve to know what they’re actually signing up for, not some Instagram-filtered version of marriage that doesn’t exist.
The truth won’t scare off the right people; it’ll just prepare them better.