You may not be in love with or interested in your baby daddy, but you want to maintain a cordial relationship with him, at least for the sake of the child or children you both share.
If people think parenting and marriage are hard, they should try co-parenting.
It’s such a hassle having a kid with someone you don’t have a committed relationship with.
And if you’re already in the situation, the last thing you need is to deal with feelings of animosity from the person you’re co-parenting with.
If you have noticed that your baby daddy seems to hate you, it would help for you to know why.
Let us consider some of the reasons.
“Why Does My Baby Daddy Hate Me?” – 12 Reasons He Can’t Stand You
1. He thinks you’re a bad mom
From your choice of meals for your child to the school or daycare they attend, to even the shows they watch on TV, your baby daddy is constantly scrutinizing and criticizing.
When two adults with divergent views have a kid together, they may have conflicting opinions on raising the kid.
If your baby daddy thinks that you’re making poor decisions for his child or you’re not doing enough as a mom, it can build up unpleasant feelings in him towards you.
Perhaps he digs holes into everything you say or do because he doesn’t believe in your role as a mother.
2. He regrets having a kid with you
No child born is a mistake, but the parents may sometimes feel like they made a mistake engaging in the action that led to the birth of the child or by the person they had the child with.
It is never the child’s fault, but is solely the responsibility of the two adults involved.
If your baby daddy hates you, maybe he regrets having a kid with you.
He may have liked you as a partner but not as a co-parent.
Having a kid with you may have made him realize that the relationship he wanted with you did not involve a child.
This is why people must discuss and be sure they want to have kids before taking the step to do so.
3. You tricked him with pregnancy
If this is you, then you shouldn’t be wondering why your baby daddy hates you.
You both probably agreed not to have a kid, but for some reason, you independently decided you wanted to.
I have seen women who proceeded to have babies even when the man they were with clearly stated that he didn’t want to have babies with them.
They thought that having a kid for him would make him commit to them or make him stop cheating if he was, but that hardly ever works.
In fact, it usually turns out the other way; instead of making him value you more and want to commit to you, it could make him resentful because now he feels caged.
4. You say negative things to your kid about him
You can’t be bad-mouthing your baby daddy to people and expect him to like you.
If you’re badmouthing him to mutual friends and family members, he won’t like you, but badmouthing him to his kid?
That’s on another level.
You may have some personal issues with him and have higher expectations from him as a dad, but talking to his kids about it and making them see him in a negative light can quickly stir up trouble.
5. He’s in love with you
Ever heard about reverse psychology?
That may be what is happening here.
Your baby daddy may have started developing some feelings for you and is trying to mask it under what looks like hatred.
He doesn’t want to make his feelings known because that is not your agreement.
So you may catch him stealing glances at you and showing some form of care but still acting abrasive sometimes as though he hates you, leaving you confused.
Although this is a possibility, it is not one to jump on and make a conclusion by.
Particularly if he hasn’t made any verbal commitment to you.
6. Frequent conflicts
Maybe you guys fight a lot, and he’s just tired and has become aggrieved.
If there’s always a squabble about something and you can never agree on anything, it will create hostility.
It’s not uncommon for people to argue and fight when co-parenting, but they must be ready to put their grievances aside and find a middle ground because of the child involved.
I mean, they didn’t ask to be born; you both brought them here, and it’s only right to try to give them a healthy atmosphere of love.
7. He’s overburdened and feels unappreciated
The responsibility of parenthood is one that people are often unprepared for.
They think they’re ready, but they almost want to back out when the realities confront them.
Parenting requires you to show up daily whether you feel like it or not.
When I say showing up, I mean that in every way: physically, financially, mentally, and so on.
If your baby daddy feels overwhelmed by the responsibilities of being a father and doesn’t manage it well, he may take it out on you.
The financial toll from child support, considering the kid in all his decisions, and so on.
Mainly if he’s been showing up and you don’t show any form of appreciation or you’re not pulling your weight.
That man can get frustrated and become resentful.
8. You get more time with the baby than he gets
The issue of who gets custody and arrangements for visiting days for the other parent is an agelong battle between co-parents.
It happens in different forms and styles; one party may feel cheated like they don’t get enough time with the baby.
On the other hand, they may feel like they have to be there for the baby all the time, and the other party just enjoys their life alone.
Both scenarios can bring about hard feelings if not handled well.
If the former applies to your case, then that may be the reason your baby daddy hates you.
He feels deprived of the time and opportunity to bond with his children and create memories and values in them.
9. Past relationship issues
You are his baby mama and not his wife, fiancée, or girlfriend, and that’s because the two of you have gone through a lot.
You had issues in your relationship that led to its dissolution.
These past issues can resurface and affect how he relates with you as a co-parent.
He may still feel anger or resentment towards you for those unresolved conflicts from the past, and this could be why he hates you.
10. Lack of communication
The most successful parenting relationships rely on open dialogue between both parents.
Unfortunately, this is not always possible or achievable in some circumstances.
Miscommunication is one of the core reasons for misunderstandings and issues between two people.
It is possible that your co-parent simply does not understand you, and this lack of communication could lead to him hating you.
If he cannot express his feelings to you, then it’s likely that the resentment will only continue to grow until some sort of resolution can be reached.
11. Power struggle
When people have a child together, and they are not a couple, each person is likely to think they know what’s best for the child.
This can lead to a power struggle, where both people are vying for their opinions to be heard.
It can also lead to frustration and helplessness when one parent feels they are not being listened to or taken seriously.
Ultimately, this can cause tension between parents if no agreement is reached.
12. Different parenting styles
People come from different backgrounds and have been raised in various environments, so it stands to reason that they will have some differences in parenting styles.
Some couples decide on one set of rules and expectations for their children, while others prefer a more relaxed parenting style, allowing for a certain degree of flexibility.
If you and your baby daddy have different ideas about parenting, this could lead to conflict as each person tries to impose their way of doing things on the other.
12. Jealousy or envy
Jealousy and envy can also play a role in why someone might hate another person.
If your co-parent sees you succeeding at something that he isn’t able to do, it could breed feelings of resentment and hatred towards you.
It is important to remember that this type of behavior usually stems from insecurity or feeling inadequate.
Final Thoughts
These issues are the most probable reasons for the negative feelings your baby daddy has for you.
But guess what? If you carefully observe and ask questions, you can only know which applies specifically to your case.
You have to talk to your baby daddy about his disposition towards you and hear what he has to say.
Communicate with him about the dangers of bitterness regarding the child you’re raising between you two.
An atmosphere of hatred is not good for any child, and it is the responsibility of the parents to ensure they don’t have to deal with that.
Prioritizing the child’s welfare requires finding out the reason for the hard feelings and addressing it.
Even though you are not dating or best of friends, you can maintain a healthy co-parent relationship with each other.