Daily, we are all saddled with the duty of interacting with a broad spectrum of people ranging from the ones we love and adore, our favorite people in the world to the people who we can’t stand even as much as the breath they take.
There are several reasons why you can’t seem to stand some people.
Perhaps, it’s the way they make you feel in their presence – nervous, petty, or jealous that puts you off around them.
For some others, it may be because they are just appalling – stubborn, inconsiderate, or holding tightly to beliefs that don’t sit well with you.
Perhaps too, these people must have hurt you in ways that you’ve chosen to not forgive or forget.
For some of us, we ideally do not want to have anything to do with these people and our lives are just perfect without them in them.
But this is not a good way to live as it is not very practical for most people.
Wondering what to do if you hate someone?
Ranging from working every day with an overbearing boss, being at an event with another guest who you can’t stand to going through a custody arrangement with your ex, there are centralized principles in place to help you get around dealing with the people you hate.
Let’s take a look at some of them below.
What To Do If You Hate Someone
1. Take Care Of Yourself Before The Interaction
When your resistance is down, it is more difficult to have an already strained and difficult interaction.
You might have experienced handling of issues poorly because you didn’t get enough rest or sleep beforehand.
Or you might feel that you’re walking on air because it’s been a while you carried out your exercise routine and there’s so much energy built up inside of you that has no opening for release.
It doesn’t matter if the interactions are one-off events or they’re going to be continuous, prepare for them like a soldier prepares to go to war.
Be mindful of everything, eat good food, exercise, and get enough rest.
These preparations help to make you stronger and keep you ready to take on unfavorable conditions.
They also help your doggedness stay intact.
2. Learn To Not Personalise The Hate Someone Has Towards You
One of the major reasons why we hate people is that we can’t seem to stand the way they make us feel about ourselves.
We may feel that they are being judgemental about who we are, and it makes us feel low on self-esteem.
All thanks to them, we don’t feel too good about ourselves, and this angers and hurts us.
Generally, no one likes to be disliked.
We are bothered when we find out that someone has a problem with us.
What will you do if you can separate your judgment of yourself from the judgment of someone else about you?
Can you come to terms with and accept the fact that some people are just bitter and angry at others and the world at large for reasons best known to them?
Some people have problems with everything and almost everyone.
Yes, they exist and there’s no way you can ever please them.
So, do not take their dislike for you.
Most times, they don’t like you not because of who you are, but because of who they are.
Don’t waste your time thinking of how to deal with such people.
It’s surely useless.
3. Ensure That You Have A Clear Cut Plan And Rehearse It Mentally
Physical stress response and the feelings of upset that are associated with it can be reduced by control and predictability.
You don’t have to be so rigid thereby putting yourself in a difficult situation when things do not go as planned.
Having a clear-cut plan that outlines what the interaction will look like is advised.
How long will the interaction take?
Have you mapped out your escape routes (these include logistically and mentally)?
Do you have any conversation enders or topic changers you can use to wriggle out of a difficult situation?
Just like any great project that has the potentials of going both right and wrong, you must be well equipped for any kind of outcome.
4. Remind Yourself That You’re Loved
Envisaging a loving scene can help step down the anger triggers you get from someone you don’t like.
Imagine seeing someone who makes you super uncomfortable and makes your hairs stand on end and then you switch things up by thinking of a loved one as soon as you can.
It’ll surely bring down the tension coursing through your veins and help the situation not escalate to something more serious.
5. Set Your Boundaries And Stick To Them
Want to know what to do if you hate someone?
Stick to your boundaries.
Most times, the worst part of having an encounter with someone you hate lies in beating yourself up that you couldn’t do much for yourself during the encounter.
You tend to rehearse the conversation over and over in your head and feel that you didn’t do so much to stand up for yourself.
Reach an agreement with yourself about what is and what’s not acceptable concerning your actions.
While it’s true that you can’t control the actions of the other party, you can be in full control of how you feel about the meeting.
Affirm the way you want things to go from your end and stick to it.
This way, you’re protecting your sanity and yourself from being haunted for some time by the events from the encounter.
6. Involve A Third Party
Want to know what to do if you hate someone?
Involving a third party in the encounter is advised too.
For some people, being around someone else will help dissipate the tension involved in dealing with someone they find unpleasant.
So, you can try having a trusted person who you’re also comfortable in their presence to be around if you ever need to have a meeting with someone you hate.
Even if you’re not so close to the third party, having someone else around can save you from a lot of physical and mental stress in the long run.