”My boyfriend tells his friends about our fights!”
Everything about relationships isn’t always pleasurable.
The hardest and trickiest part of a relationship is always securing your privacy.
Because a relationship entails bringing another person into your life to share the entirety of your life, protecting your privacy becomes very important.
Sometimes, we may feel that our partner is overwhelming our minds, bodies, and souls.
One such scenario happens when your boyfriend tells his friends everything that happens between you.
In this case, you feel that you do not have any privacy anymore, and it gives you sleepless nights, especially when he tells his friends about your fights.
In this piece, we’ll examine why your boyfriend tells his friends about your fights and how you can handle the situation.
My Boyfriend Tells His Friends About Our Fights: 9 Reasons He Does
1. He is an extrovert
Your relationship can become complicated if you’re an introvert and your boyfriend is an extrovert.
One thing you should know about extroverts is that they’re expressive with their feelings and emotions.
They don’t seem to understand the need to keep things in check.
And as such, they like going to new places, meeting new people, and experiencing new things.
You’re the center of your boyfriend’s world, and he’ll want to share every tiny detail about you with his friends, including your fights.
2. His friends open up to him too
Maybe his friends also tell him about the fights they have with their girlfriends.
To be fair, I think that he should be okay with sharing if he feels okay listening to his friends rant about their girlfriends.
After all, if he enjoys listening to the relationship drama of his friends, he should expect it to happen to him too.
3. He is immature
Your guy might be immature if he still runs off to tell his friends about your recent fight.
He just hasn’t outgrown that stage yet and has a lot of growing up to do.
Perhaps he still savors the attention that’s on him whenever he’s filling the ears of his friends with details of your fight.
4. He asks them for advice
Perhaps he seeks their advice whenever you guys fight.
As is typical with most people, his friends may claim to be great at dishing good relationship advice.
Your boyfriend might indulge them and want them to weigh in whenever you guys fight.
5. He is very close to his friends
You might just be analyzing and thinking too much.
Maybe your boyfriend talks about your fights because he is very close to his friends.
He didn’t set out to do it with the intent of disrespecting you.
It can be that he’s looking for someone to talk to about the things you do, and he found solace in his friends.
6. He disrespects you
Another reason why your boyfriend tells his friends about your fights could be that he doesn’t respect you.
Perhaps he believes in controlling and dominating women.
You may have talked to him about it, and he didn’t listen to you.
If he respects you, he wouldn’t constantly air your dirty laundry to his friends at the slightest disagreement.
7. He is a gossip
Does your boyfriend love to gossip?
If your answer is yes, why are you surprised that your name is flying around among his circle of friends?
You’re dating a man who loves gossip to the extent that he disregards his surroundings and the issue at hand to delve into the things that happen in his relationship.
This type of person talks nonstop till he has spilled everything on his chest.
Until you make a firm decision that he needs to be mindful of the stories or words that leave his mouth, there’s no end to this.
8. He doesn’t have healthy self-esteem
It may be that the guy lacks healthy self-esteem.
He doesn’t know that he’s making people question his integrity whenever he goes around talking about things that happened between the two of you, especially the fights.
His integrity is questionable.
Perhaps the friends he keeps are just like him, who lacks good self-esteem.
I mean, people with poor self-esteem have no self-respect.
If you respect yourself, you’ll learn how to keep private matters private!
9. You also tell your friends about your fights
It’s possible that you also mention the fights to your friends or family, and this may be influencing his behavior.
If this is the case, then you can’t be angry with him because it’s coming from both sides.
What’s sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander.
5 Things To Do If Your Boyfriend Tells His Friends About Your Fights
Here are some of the things you can do to your boyfriend if he can’t seem to keep his mouth shut whenever both of you fight:
1. Confront him
Let your boyfriend know that you’re aware that he tells his friends about your fights.
It may make him ashamed of himself and force him to stop doing it.
If he comes up with an excuse or lies about it, however, don’t be afraid to stand your ground.
And don’t be afraid of his reaction.
Sometimes, people, including our loved ones, need us to be firm/tough with them to put them back on the right track whenever they go astray.
2. Warn him about his behavior
Do not hesitate to warn your partner if you find out that they are engaging in something disturbing that robs you of your peace of mind.
Let the warning be clear in such a way that he’ll be aware of the consequences of his actions.
3. Tell him that you’re disappointed
Let him know that his actions are disappointing, if he doesn’t repent.
What he did was unacceptable, and tell him that you expected better from him.
Watch him and see his reaction to your words.
If you moved him with your words, you can expect a change in him.
4. Give him a taste of his own medicine
You might want to let your boyfriend have a taste of his own medicine if he keeps telling his friends about your fights despite your warnings.
Do it to him to let him feel how you used to whenever he’s on the loose.
Tell your friends things about him when you fight.
Don’t forget to include the juicy details.
Let’s see if he’ll ever discuss you with his friends after receiving such treatment.
You don’t have to do this anyway, but if you want to, it might help him understand how you feel.
I don’t think I’d do this.
”If they go low, we go high,” as the saying goes.
5. Don’t give up, if you can’t break up
If you are unable to break up with him, then don’t give up on having a healthy relationship.
I believe your boyfriend has some positive sides, and this might just be a weakness.
Continue to communicate with him, work on the relationship, and also set boundaries so that he can learn to respect you more.
It might take some time for your partner to understand and change his behavior, but don’t give up until you get the results you want.
Who knows, he might come to realize why airing out your dirty laundry is not beneficial for both of you.