”My boyfriend and I have nothing in common!”
If this is your situation, please keep reading.
Is it okay not to have anything in common with your boyfriend?
Do you always feel that you and your boyfriend are on opposite sides of the divide?
Do both of you have different friendship circles and hobbies?
Do you find it difficult to spend time with him because you two can’t seem to agree on a hangout spot?
Sweetheart, you’re not alone.
Having nothing in common between partners is more common than you think.
The saying “opposites attract” is sometimes true.
Generally, people tend to be attracted to other people who exhibit different characteristics from them.
While it spices up the relationship and makes it exciting during the early stage, it can become hard to forge ahead in your relationship when that initial excitement wears off.
You may not experience this as there are couples with nothing in common but are okay with being in a relationship while having their separate lives.
However, it can be an issue for other people when one or both parties may feel those differences are preventing the relationship from moving forward.
Is this your predicament?
You want to see how you can bond with your boyfriend even when you both have nothing in common.
Let’s look at some of the tips you should put into consideration.
They will act as a guide to help bridge the gap between you and your boyfriend.
”My Boyfriend And I Have Nothing In Common”: 5 Tips To Help You Gain A Common Ground
1. Why Did You Get Together In The First Place?
Can you recall why you got together in the first place?
You both might have something in common, but you can’t see it now because you’re probably frustrated.
Aren’t you guys dating?
Even if it’s just a mutual attraction, there has to be a common ground that brought both of you together.
Think about it.
What did you like about him in the first place?
Which part of yourself did you see in him that attracted you?
You might have gotten into a relationship only based on physical attraction, and nothing is wrong with it.
However, the problem lies in making it into something it’s not.
While it’s important to be physically attracted to your boyfriend, don’t be surprised there will be many incompatibilities when you build a relationship based on physical attraction.
Attraction is not static; it changes and even fades as time passes.
It can be that you have reached a point in your relationship where the initial excitement has begun to fade.
You find out you truly have nothing in common with him.
It can be depressing, especially if you like this person.
But remember that liking someone doesn’t mean you’re compatible with that person.
2. Make Clear The Reason Why You’re In The Relationship
Do you feel like you do nothing but sit around whenever you spend time together?
Does it bore the hell out of you?
It looks like you two are moving in totally different directions in life.
Your relationship feels like work because you’re trying to find the things you and your boyfriend have in common.
You keep asking yourself what you’re working to.
An important question you need to ask yourself is if you feel elevated when you’re around your boyfriend.
Does the relationship drain you, or does he add value to your life?
One way or the other, it doesn’t have to be anyone’s fault.
Things may not work out sometimes.
You can love each other and still have serious incompatibilities.
Sometimes, the best thing to do is to let each other go, have your separate lives and be true to yourself.
However, this is not always the case.
Take a step back and think of your current situation, and where your relationship is heading.
Your relationship may just be going through a rough patch.
You might just find a common ground with your boyfriend in the most unexpected places.
3. Do You Have Deeper Things In Common?
You and your boyfriend might have nothing in common on the outside — you have different tastes in music, come from different cultures or have different hobbies.
You may even be total opposites on the outside but it’s different inside.
What are some of the deeper things that connect you with them that you overlooked?
These deeper things may be very subtle that they won’t stand out in their daily activities.
For instance, do you share a similar life mission with your boyfriend?
Do both of you have a burning desire to explore the world, contribute to humanity or build a wealthy future?
Are your aspirations compatible?
Those are common grounds between you and your boyfriend.
Having the same mindset can successfully channel you two in the same direction.
And the beautiful part is…
This type of connection lasts longer than a bond created by some of the surface-level things you have in common.
4. Go On A Journey Together
Going on a journey together is one of the deepest ways to build common ground with your boyfriend.
If you’re able to set goals together, you’ll find that your paths around these goals will be laden with the things you both have in common.
Determine the goals either or both of you will like to achieve consciously.
Is there something both of you can do together to help push you in a particular direction and keep you on that path to success?
Perhaps you want to generate more income streams, or you want to eat healthily.
Go on that journey with your boyfriend.
Merely being around each other and throwing in words of encouragement from time to time is also part of having something in common.
The best part?
You can boast of having something healthy in common.
Most of the time you feel you’ve outgrown someone, it is simply that you have no journey to embark on with that person anymore.
And this makes you feel stuck or stagnant whenever you’re with them.
You have to get moving if you want things to start moving again in your relationship.
What’s the next thing you’ll like to achieve in life?
Why not take your boyfriend on that adventure?
Sometimes, going hand-in-hand while embarking on life’s journey is all the common ground you need.
5. Try Out New Things Together As Often As You Can
If you feel that you don’t have anything in common with your boyfriend, you can change that to some extent.
Have you ever thought of trying out new activities none of you have attempted before but that both of you can participate in together?
Paintball, chess, and other fun activities you can indulge in as a couple is nearly endless.
You cannot force someone to be interested in something they have no interest in.
I’ll advise you also not to try an activity you don’t like simply because your boyfriend loves it.
It’s a quick recipe for pretending to be who you’re not.
The deal is to form a habit of trying out new things together as often as you can.
You might find some things you two have in common that you never noticed before.
Let things flow naturally.
Don’t force it if it feels like a chore.