Every marriage goes through tough times, and it’s normal to have disagreements and challenges.
However, if you suspect your husband is planning to leave you, that is a big deal.
It has gone beyond the usual troubles of marriage.
Understandably, you don’t want to be blindsided by your husband, so you want to know the signs your husband is planning to leave you.
While every man is different and your marriage and its challenges are peculiar, some signs can indicate that your husband’s heart is no longer in your marriage.
10 Signs Your Husband Is Planning To Leave You
1. He’s Emotionally Disconnected And Distant
One of the signs your husband is planning to leave you is if he’s distant and disconnected emotionally.
It often happens when husband and wife are torn away from each other by house chores, parenting duties, and work.
You’ll find that after being busy the whole week and spending time with the children, you and your husband will have no time to spend with each other.
Sometimes, this is normal.
But if you observe your husband intentionally creating that distance between you two, something is brewing, and that’s not good.
In a healthy marriage, both partners should feel connected and able to communicate their thoughts, feelings, and needs.
So, if your husband starts to become distant and emotionally closed off, it’s a sign he’s pulling away from the relationship.
Maybe you keep asking him what the matter is, and his constant response is ‘nothing’.
You feel like you are living with a stranger because you don’t know your husband anymore.
This isn’t the man you married.
2. He Picks Fights With You
Does your husband derive pleasure in picking fights with you constantly?
It can be one of the signs your husband is planning to leave you.
Disagreements are normal in every relationship, but if your husband is fighting you over little things and seems to be on edge all the time, he might be planning his exit from your marriage.
Aside from the emotional disconnection causing your arguments, your husband might be fighting you because he’s trying to get you to leave first.
If he thinks that will make him look like the victim and not like the one who wants out of the marriage, he is doing that on purpose.
He might also be fighting you on purpose to get you angry enough to say something he can use as an excuse to split up with you.
He only wants to push you to act in ways that will justify his quitting the marriage.
3. He’s Sleeping In Another Room
While it’s not uncommon for couples to sleep in separate beds or rooms for various reasons, pay attention to any changes in your husband’s sleeping habits and consider the context.
If he has always slept in a separate room and this hasn’t caused any issues in the past, it may not be a red flag.
But if he has recently started sleeping in another room and this is a change from his previous behavior, it could be a sign that he is withdrawing from the relationship.
He may be planning on leaving and wants some space before he makes his decision.
4. He’s Avoiding Intimacy
It’s general knowledge that lack of sex in marriage is not a good sign and should not be ignored.
Your husband has either fallen asleep or is tired whenever you want to initiate sex with him.
Even when he agrees to have sex, it’s terrible, tasteless, and quick.
It seems your marriage has become (almost) sexless.
When people are about to break up with their partners, they often stop being interested in sexual activity.
Apart from losing interest in their partners, they also don’t want to deal with the emotional fallout of sex and intimacy, so they avoid it altogether.
5. He starts lying
If your husband is planning on leaving you, he may lie about where he goes, who he sees, and what he does while out of the house.
He might say he has work meetings when he’s just going out for drinks with his friends.
He might say he’s at a friend’s house when he’s still at work.
He might be lying because he doesn’t want you to track his movement or because he doesn’t want to be accountable to you.
So, he feels he doesn’t owe you any explanation.
6. He stops wearing his wedding ring
It is not uncommon for people to stop wearing their wedding rings for various reasons, and this does not necessarily mean that they are planning to leave their spouse.
It could be that the person is experiencing swelling in their fingers, has developed an allergy to the material of the ring, or finds it more comfortable not to wear it.
But your husband isn’t experiencing any of these, and things haven’t been going on fine as well; he might be planning his exit.
7. He doesn’t want to spend time with you anymore
I understand that sometimes, married people need their space, especially when a spouse is going through a difficult time or experiencing stress or anxiety.
However, there’s a difference between needing space and checking out of your relationship.
A man who needs space to sort out his personal issues will not make his wife worried about him.
She knows what is going on with him and gives him the space he needs.
But the wife of a man who wants to leave her will be in the dark about what’s happening to her husband.
That’s because he’s planning to do something that’d hurt her.
So he’s spending time away from her and the kids.
He doesn’t want to go on dates, eat with the family, go on a vacation with his family, or engage in family activities because, in his mind, the family is over.
He’s no longer a part of it.
8. He’s stopped being affectionate with you
Physical intimacy in marriage is more than getting busy between the sheets.
Kissing, holding hands, hugging, saying ”I love you”, and maintaining eye contact are ways of establishing physical and emotional intimacy.
He may be trying to distance himself from you before ending things for good.
And there’s no better way to do that than by removing any form of physical intimacy from the relationship.
9. You suspect he’s cheating
A man planning to leave his wife will often cheat on her before he leaves.
If he’s leaving you, then he might already have an option.
As a matter of fact, it’s this option that usually makes a man want to abandon his wife in the first place.
If he doesn’t have another option, why is he leaving?
To discover himself?
If you suspect that he has been cheating on you, in addition to all these signs, he might be planning to leave you.
10. He shuts down when you try to talk about issues in your marriage
If your husband avoids talking about your relationship problems and gets defensive when confronted about certain situations in your marriage, it’s a sign he doesn’t want to work things out or save the marriage at all.
Even if you’ve been having issues, a man who wants to save his marriage will be open to doing whatever it takes to ensure that, which starts with talking about the problems you’ve been having.
If he’s planning to leave you, he won’t put any effort into saving your marriage.
Signs Your Husband Is Planning To Leave You: What You Should Do
While watching your marriage crumble is hard, it’s better to be aware of the signs that can help you understand what’s happening instead of living in denial.
It is okay to feel a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, and confusion.
However, you need to remain calm and approach the situation in a way that is respectful and non-confrontational.
Here are a few steps you can take:
1. Communicate openly with your husband
It’s good that you are reading signs your husband wants to leave you but what if you are wrong?
What if there’s something else going on with him?
If he hasn’t told you directly that he’s leaving you, you need to find out what’s going on in his head.
You are not a mind reader, so you need to ask him.
Have an honest and candid conversation with your husband about your feelings and concerns.
Ask him directly if he is considering leaving the relationship and try to understand his perspective.
Maybe you are hurting him in a way you are not aware of.
Communication will help you figure it out.
Hopefully, he will be willing to talk.
2. Seek support
Suspecting your husband is planning to leave you is no child’s play.
You need every support you can get.
Lean on your support system for support.
It could be a trusted friend, family member, pastor, or therapist.
They can provide you with a supportive ear and help you work through your emotions.
3. Consider couples therapy
Couples therapy is highly recommended if you and your husband are willing to work through the issues in your marriage.
A therapist can help you identify and address any underlying issues and work towards a resolution.
4. Take care of yourself
Take care of yourself emotionally and physically during this difficult time.
You need yourself.
Your husband may leave you, but you have yourself.
Don’t leave yourself.
Make sure to get enough rest, exercise, and nutrition, and engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation.