Are you wondering what to do when he ghosts you and comes back?
This article will answer all the questions you have about ghosters and their modes of operation.
It is generally difficult to know how best to proceed with a ghoster who comes back until you clearly understand why he ghosted you and why he suddenly wants to come back into your life.
So, let’s look at the various factors surrounding if it’s possible that he wants to come back after ghosting you and why he wants to come back.
Do Ghosters Come Back After Ghosting You?
If you’re reading this article because he came back after ghosting you, you have your answer.
But you still want to know the likelihood of him coming back.
What you should be looking for are the reasons why he ghosted you and if he’ll likely do it again if you accept him back.
So, here are some clues that he’s back to toy with your heart and run out of the door again:
- Rather than apologize, he finds ways to justify his ghosting behavior
- If you ask questions about his ghosting actions, he’ll accuse you of letting your pride get in the way and insinuate that you’re overreacting
- He wants both of you to get back together, ON HIS TERMS
- He expects you to continue the relationship from where you left off
- He doesn’t care about your well-being, generally
In all honesty, he may see nothing wrong in what he did by ghosting you.
He might expect you to discard the need to ask him questions about what happened and move on as if nothing happened.
However, if you insist on doing the contrary, he might ghost you again because you’re not special to him.
Well, that’s the good part because he shouldn’t be special to you either.
What Does It Mean For A Guy To Ghost You And Come Back?
You might be tempted to think that he came back after ghosting you because he found out that you’re the one he loves, and he decided to do away with his fears and face his love life.
It’ll shock you to discover that the real reasons for his actions are less connected to romance.
Here are some possible motives behind his return to your life:
- He doesn’t like that you’ve moved on from him and wants to stay relevant in your life
- His previous relationship ended, and he came back to console himself with you
- He needs company, and you’re the most suitable option available
- You’re fun to be with, and he doesn’t want it to end, but it must be on his terms
- He truly misses you and regrets the way he treated you in the past
Dear lady, it is better that you’re alone and in love with yourself than being a consolation prize or side piece to anyone.
If he cannot see you for your real worth, prove him wrong by not taking him back.
What To Do When He Ghosts You And Comes Back
Having looked at the possibilities of his coming back and some possible reasons why he’ll want to come back, the next thing to do is find out what you can do about it.
Here are some steps you should consider taking before thinking of being friends with him or even jumping back into his arms
1. Question him to know why he ghosted you in the first place
If you feel that he’s worth it and want to know why he ghosted you in the first place, you are well within your rights to ask him questions about the topic and demand honest answers.
You can also open up to him about how you felt when he ghosted you if you feel that he won’t use it against you in the future.
You don’t owe anyone automatic forgiveness; take your time to get over what he did to you.
But if he expects you to forgive and forget in a flash, there is a high possibility of him using you again.
And if that’s the case, he’ll likely ghost you again whenever he feels like it.
2. Trust your instincts
While listening to his answers to your questions, listen to your inner voice and trust what your instincts are telling you about him.
Even if you’re staring at all the red flags you missed before, it still doesn’t mean you’ll avoid them this time.
Indeed, it’s more difficult to trust your instincts when someone is saying all the things you want to hear and the sparks are still flying.
You need to know that your happiness doesn’t rely on his ability to see your worth rather, it depends on your knowing your worth.
3. Ask yourself if he’s worth it
Before you take his calls, reply to his texts or even let him into your house, think about if he’s worthy of getting a response in the first place.
But bear in mind that you do not owe him anything.
If you think he’s worth it and want to hear his reasons for ghosting you, you can spare him some time.
Ask yourself if communicating with him will be worth your emotional energy and time.
He has acted carelessly with both before.
Do not give him a chance to toy with them again.
4. Do not let him come close to you
Guys like him mostly want to show you that they can have you whenever they want.
It’ll be difficult for him to gaslight or manipulate you if you keep him at arm’s length and he can’t tell how you feel about him.
Whenever you’re talking to him, keep emotions out of your voice and try to sound as detached as possible.
Don’t give him or anyone else a chance to waltz into your life and hurt you.
5. You can test him
If a ghoster ever reaches out again and seems eager to be with you, don’t hesitate to test him if you have to.
You can ask him to join you to carry out your activities of interest.
He doesn’t have the right to want to come back to you on his terms.
Pay close attention to his character if he agrees to abide by your rules.
But if he seems pissed that things are not going his way, back off from him.
He’s more interested in what he’ll gain from you than your happiness.
6. Put yourself first
Always remember to put yourself first before his need to spend time with you.
Take good care of yourself and love yourself to a stupor.
If this guy leaves again, you’ll always have yourself.
So, don’t even let him make you feel bad for taking good care of yourself.
Focus on the things that make you happy because he is likely to won’t do them for you.
7. Treat him the way you want to be treated
If a guy ghosts you and comes back, you can decide not to beat about the bush and be straightforward with him.
Treat him just the way you want to be treated.
Be honest with him and let him know that you’re equal to the task if it ever comes to serving heartbreaks or spoiling someone with love.
Tell him that whatever vibe you detect from him is exactly what he’ll get from you in return.
Then sit back and watch him disappear from your life or put in the effort to make the relationship work.