“Do guys really want to be friends after a breakup?”
The question above is one of the hottest for debate whenever relationship topics arise.
Can people return to being just friends sincerely after being in a serious relationship?
As expected, there are different answers to the question from different people.
In this article, we’ll see if guys really want to be friends after a breakup.
If he ended the relationship and wants to be friends with you all of a sudden, don’t get comfortable around him.
He has something up his sleeves.
If you were the one who ended things and he wants to be friends, he might want to use the friendship as a ploy to win you back.
Usually, and for genuine reasons, guys do not want to be friends with their ex-girlfriends after a breakup.
As a lady, think about the cunning nature of men.
Maybe you’ve been in a situation where a guy you considered a friend made a move on you when he found out that you’re either single or going through a breakup.
Don’t be surprised at how insincere guys can get when it comes to being genuine friends with women.
However, that shouldn’t stop you from checking out some reasons why a guy wants to be friends with his ex-girlfriend.
It’ll help you understand better what you’re getting yourself into and let you know if it’s something you can handle.
Do Guys Really Want To Be Friends After A Breakup?
6 Possible Reasons Why Guys Want To Be Friends After A Breakup
1. He wants to lure you back to him using friendship
Do guys really want to be friends after a breakup?
He’ll do that if he feels that he can use the friendship to get you back into a relationship with him.
It usually happens if you ended things or he hurt you badly.
He’ll want to use friendship as a ploy to make it up to you and get back into your good books.
Especially if he wasn’t the one who broke up with you, it is very hard to see a guy who wants to remain friends with his ex-girlfriend.
It’s usually a way to stay around you till he gets the opportunity to make a move on you.
He’ll want to use friendship to get you.
2. He wants to have you around for intimacy or sex
The quickest way to know if a guy wants to be friends with you after a breakup to have you for intimacy or sexual purposes is if he’s the one who broke up with you, asked to be friends, and still acts distant till he needs you to warm his bed.
The truth is that he only wants to be friends with benefits with you.
Think of being in such a situation with a guy, and he ghosts you the moment he finds a woman he deems worthy of being in a relationship with.
You’re reducing your value and the meaning of intimacy the moment you agree to go into such situations.
It’ll not take time for him to reveal his true colors and begin to disrespect you.
And it’s so easy to agree to be friends with benefits with him if you’ve been dickmatized.
If you guys weren’t celibate and you’ve explored every nook and cranny of each other’s body, and you know he’s so good in that department…
Sis, I can imagine how tough it’d be to resist turning down his offer of friendship after breaking up.
3. He doesn’t want to feel too guilty for breaking up with you
It is only someone who never cared about you who wouldn’t feel any remorse or guilt for breaking up with you.
Whether you were dumped or you did the dumping, it’s not easy on either side.
Remorse and guilt are the two emotions most commonly experienced by the one who dumped the other person.
In a bid to feel less guilty about breaking up with you, your ex-boyfriend might offer you a genuine hand of friendship.
While his intentions may be pure, the timing is wrong for you.
No amount of friendship makes up for the pain of the heartbreak you experienced.
4. He’s using you as a backup plan
Any man who doesn’t want to sacrifice his comfort but wants to reap from where the grass is greener is the type that ends a relationship with you for shallow reasons and still wants to be friends with you.
While looking for an ideal partner, he’ll use friendship to keep you hostage and ghost you when he finds a lady who he thinks is his perfect match.
If he doesn’t find his ideal woman after some time, he’ll suggest getting back together with you.
The real question is, “do you want to be reduced to just a backup plan for a guy?”
5. He wants to build friendship and support you genuinely
There are good examples where a guy genuinely wants to be friends with you after a breakup.
Maybe both of you started as just friends, and you realized that you’re better off as friends than as romantic partners.
It can also be that he genuinely cares for you and wants to remain in your life to offer you encouragement and support.
Some relationships were never meant to be.
They’re bound to hit the rocks, no matter your efforts to make it work.
If you were in this type of relationship, he could be offering a hand of friendship sincerely because the breakup wasn’t the fault of anyone.
6. He’s avoiding being lonely
You’re not the only one going through several emotions simultaneously after a breakup.
It’s typical for the one who did the dumping and the one who was dumped to feel doubtful, anxious, afraid, and lonely.
It’s just the timing that differs for both parties, with the one who did the dumping going through these emotions a bit later after the end of the relationship.
However, if the relationship ends due to irreconcilable differences, both parties will simultaneously experience suffering, pain, and loneliness.
Whenever any serious relationship ends, it always comes with the same emotions.
Indeed, change is constant, but sometimes, it’s not easy.
Losing someone who truly cared about you can be painful and discomforting.
It is a selfish move on his end because there’s no assurance that he won’t ghost you once he manages these negative emotions and gets through them.
If you’ve read to this point, I hope I’ve armed you with more than enough knowledge to help you take a stand on whether or not you should agree to be friends with your ex-boyfriend.
Ultimately, it’s up to you to prioritize your well-being and happiness.
If being friends with an ex will only give you comfort in a short time and then, long-term suffering, you have no business agreeing with such a deal.
Do what’s best for you.
Take a stand that doesn’t reduce your self-confidence and threaten your emotional, mental and physical well-being.