”Never go to bed angry.”
This is one of the commonest pieces of marital advice that we’ve all heard.
While I understand the sentiment behind it, I have to disagree.
Yes, it’s important not to let fights linger, but sometimes, I don’t want to talk to my husband immediately after a fight.
I like to process my emotions and thoughts before jumping into a discussion.
But what’s unhealthy is when this processing turns into days of not talking to each other.
If you and your partner are guilty of this, you are probably one of the types of couples who fall into the pattern of not talking for days after a fight.
15 Types of Couples Who Don’t Talk To Each Other For Days After a Fight
1. The Stubborn Couple
These couples are like two immovable rocks.
After a fight, it’s a stubborn contest.
Neither partner wants to make the first move to reconcile.
It’s a silent standoff where each person is waiting for the other to blink first.
They think, “Why should I apologize first?” or “I’m not going to talk until they do.”
And the funny thing, well, maybe not funny, is that they actually want to talk, but they just can’t bring themselves to break the silence.
Because they are too stubborn to!
2. The Avoidant Couple
This couple has mastered the art of avoidance.
They use distractions like work, their kids, or social events to keep them from having to talk about the fight.
They convince themselves that everything is fine as long as they’re not talking about it.
Marriage is for adults, not kids, and one of the hallmarks of adulthood is facing uncomfortable situations and having difficult conversations.
So, if you are scared of handling conflict and therefore refuse to talk about it, you fall into this category.
3. The Busy Bees
No one is more grateful to have a busy life than this couple.
Whether they both have demanding jobs or are always caught up with their individual hobbies, they always have something to do.
And after a fight, it’s the perfect excuse not to talk because they always have something else to do.
But this lifestyle is not sustainable.
Ignoring problems only leads to resentment.
How long can you ignore your partner if you are living together in a marriage?
4. The Dramatic Duo
These couples take everything to the extreme, including arguments.
When they fight, it’s like a scene from a soap opera with loud voices, tears, and slamming doors.
And after all the drama and intensity, they need a break from each other.
So, they don’t talk for days because they both need time to calm down.
They are exhausted.
And I’m even exhausted writing about them already.
5. The Passive-Aggressive Pair
I’m sure we’ve all been guilty of being passive-aggressive at some point in our lives.
But this is the go-to technique for this couple.
They don’t want to show their anger or frustration, so they make snide remarks, give the silent treatment, or use sarcasm.
And all of this is done to avoid an actual conversation about the problem.
But trust me, it only makes things worse.
6. The Prideful Partners
This couple’s egos are bigger than their love for each other.
They refuse to apologize or admit they were wrong, even if it means going days without talking.
It’s a battle of who can hold out the longest, and unfortunately, this battle leads to more distance and resentment in the relationship.
Let’s even forget huge issues like cheating, I think pride is one of the leading causes of marriage wahala.
No human is perfect.
You’ll hurt each other and make mistakes.
But that’s not as important as being able to apologize and make amends.
It’s not that simple for a couple who is so high on their ego.
7. The Passive Partners
This is when one person is always the first to apologize, even if they’re not at fault.
And the other person is content with not talking until the apology comes.
This is the reality of a lot of couples, and it’s just manipulative, pathetic, unfair, and wrong.
In any conflict, both partners play a role.
Both parties should be responsible for their actions and address the issue together without waiting for the other to apologize first.
8. The Unbothered Couple
This couple is just flat-out unbothered by everything – fights included.
They are so chill that no matter how big the fight is, they just move on like nothing happened.
The danger in being unbothered by everything is that you can become apathetic towards your partner and the relationship itself.
And before you know it, there’s no love left even to bother fighting for.
9. The Non-Communicators
These ones weren’t even talking before the fight, so there’s really no difference after a fight.
They have no problem with not talking to each other for days because they have never established healthy communication in the first place.
So after an argument, they continue with their usual routine, not discussing anything.
10. The Sulking Couple
You know those couples who are so angry with each other that they refuse to even look at each other?
Yeah, that’s the sulking couple.
They go about their day, ignoring each other and making it known that they are not on speaking terms.
But deep down, they want nothing more than to break the ice and talk things through.
11. The Competitive Couple
Everything is a competition for this couple- including fights.
They’re not just fighting to resolve an issue; they want to win the argument.
So breaking the ice means losing the fight, and no one wants to be seen as the loser.
12. The Bitter Couple
A lot of couples are living in resentment without even realizing it.
They hold grudges and refuse to let go of past mistakes.
When they fight, the negative emotions from the past come bubbling up, making it harder for them to reconcile.
They’ve become numb to their fights.
They don’t expect things to change or get better, so why bother trying?
So, they continue with their routine of not talking after a fight, living in silent misery.
13. The Perfectionists
For these ones, anything less than perfect is unacceptable.
They have high standards and expect their partner to live up to them as well.
When they fight, they want to solve the problem perfectly or not at all.
So, they wait… and wait… until they can come up with the ‘perfect’ thing to say.
The problem is, that moment often never comes.
There’s usually no perfect thing to say after a fight.
You just have to say something to break the silence and start the reconciliation process.
But for perfectionists, that’s too scary of a thought.
They’d rather stay in the fight than risk saying the wrong thing or not finding the perfect solution.
14. The Emotionally Overwhelmed
These partners feel so much they can’t find the words.
They may cry or shut down during a fight because they can’t handle the intensity of their emotions.
They struggle to express themselves and often feel misunderstood.
Thus, they need time to process their emotions but often end up in prolonged silence,.
15. The Silent Treatment Experts
These ones are the worst!
For them, silence is a well-practiced weapon.
They use it to punish, control, and manipulate their partners.
They can go days or even weeks without uttering a word.
Don’t even think this is not possible because it is.
There are couples who go on for months without speaking to each other, and it’s not because they’re practicing mindfulness and self-reflection.
It’s because one of them is using the silent treatment as a way to avoid conflict and maintain power in the relationship.
While it’s okay to need space after a fight, prolonged silence can create a gap hard to bridge.
It’s about finding that balance between taking time to cool off and not letting the silence stretch into a chasm.
If you or your partner are guilty of using the silent treatment, you need to grow up and find better ways of communicating.
Breaking this pattern requires you to swallow a bit of that pride and realize that the health of your relationship is more important than winning this silent battle.
Often, it starts with a simple, genuine gesture or word, like reaching out for their hand or saying, “Can we talk?”
Being right is less important than being happy together.
It’s not about who talks first; it’s about who’s brave enough to bridge the gap and start the healing process.
Sometimes, the bravest thing you can do is to say, “Let’s fix this together.”
I hope this helps.