Except it’s by choice and agreement, no lady wants to be in a ‘methuselah‘ relationship. That is, a long term relationship with no marriage in sight.
Everything that has a beginning is usually expected to have an end. Relationship is just like a journey starting with love and with marriage as the destination.
So you’ve been dating this guy for months…years… now, and he’s not popping the question or even saying anything about marriage, and you’re not only ready but also wondering why he hasn’t popped the question or making plans to.
Well, here is the only reason – HE’S NOT READY!
Yes, he’s not ready.
“Not ready for what?” you may ask.
1. He’s not ready for life
Whenever a lady who is ready to settle down tells me her boyfriend isn’t saying anything about marriage. The first question I ask is, “How old is he?”
And most of the times, the answer I get is, “he’s twenty something-ish”
I usually tell ladies that, just because a guy is your age mate doesn’t mean you’ll be ready for marriage at the same time.
If you’re 25 and you’re dating a guy of the same age, it’s very likely that he won’t be ready for marriage when you are.
It’s not common to find men who marry in their early or mid-twenties, but that’s the age most ladies marry.
Usually, men marry in their early thirties and above, and occasionally late twenties, for various reasons.
So if he hasn’t proposed, maybe he’s not life-ready.
2. He’s not money-ready
No sane man will propose to a lady if he doesn’t have a stable source of income. How will he start and raise a family with no money or source of money to call his own?
So, if he hasn’t proposed marriage to you yet, he’s probably thinking of his pocket, not because he doesn’t love you.
3. He doesn’t want to marry you
This is another major reason a guy may be holding back the ring. He might not be ready to settle down with YOU.
He might be age-ready and money-ready but not you-ready.
Usually, men know from the inception of the relationship if they’ll marry a lady or not.
This is why you should not lose yourself in a relationship or share your cookie with every Tom, Dick, and Harry because you don’t even know if he loves you for real or he’s just using you for sex.
4. He’s not ready for marriage life
Marriage is full of responsibilities. You need to be responsible to be a husband and a father, and this is a big deal. It’s a huge responsibility.
It takes more to be a husband and a father than to be a boyfriend.
5. He’s afraid of commitment
Some men can’t imagine being with a woman for the rest of their lives. It scares them. They can’t take their eyes off the many beauties they set eyes on. Marriage demands that you be faithful to your spouse because cheating can end a marriage.
So, the fear of committing to you forever may be keeping him from proposing.
6. He doesn’t wanna lose the thrill of chasing
Men love the fun of the chase. They love the thrill that comes with chasing a woman/women. The adrenaline they get from that makes them excited.
Getting married would mean the end of such thrill and they can’t give that up. Not for you.
7. They’re bored with the relationship
He might not be proposing because he’s bored of being in a relationship with you. While there could be many reasons for this, the major reason is usually when a lady has already become a wife to him before being ‘wifed’.
You give him sex, cook his meals, clean his house, organize his schedule, look after him etc. What exactly is left to look forward to?
I know some men will marry a lady because of these things but some won’t because they’re bored and in need of some fresh blood.
This is why some ladies feel used when a guy dumps them after performing all the ‘wifely’ duties for him.
8. He’s afraid of marriage
He might be in love with you but he’s just afraid of marriage. He thinks marriage will be the end of the relationship and he doesn’t want that to happen. He’s afraid that the marriage will not work out. Even divorce statistics aren’t helping matters.
Marriage opens your eyes to the realities that dating blinds you to. He might be afraid of this and be holding back his proposal.
9. He’s afraid of losing your shape
Some men believe that women let go of their bodies when they get married, especially when they start having kids.
As silly as this sounds, it might be the reason some men don’t want to slip a ring on that finger.
They don’t want to deal with baby fat, stretch marks, lose stomach skin, tummy pouch etc.
This isn’t the same for every woman, and women these days are taking charge of their bodies and dealing with the bodily changes of pregnancy.
So, let the fearful boyfriend not worry.
10. He simply doesn’t want to get married
Some men don’t just want to be married. Simple!
They can’t imagine themselves married. Never.
11. He’s taking his time
He might just be taking his time. Maybe he wants to know you better or wants to see if you both are compatible.
Well, it depends on how long you’ve been in a relationship with him. If you’ve been dating for more than a year, and he’s ready in every aspect, then, I wonder what is going on in his mind.
If you’ve spent some enough time with a guy and you think you guys need to take the relationship to the next level, don’t hesitate to talk to him about it.
No, you’re not desperate. You are only taking responsibility for your life. If you don’t, who will?
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