Having a beautiful relationship is not by magic or chance. A relationship is as beautiful as the effort the people involved put into it. A relationship cannot survive on its own, and a relationship does not die a natural death.
The GIGO (Garbage In Garbage Out) principle also applies to love matters; that is, whatever you get out of a relationship is determined by what you put into it.
Many beautiful relationships that could have blossomed into an amazing union have been murdered by some acts that I’ll be sharing with you. Even marriages that had the potential to be amazing have ended in divorce due to the negligence of one or both partners involved.
Below are the five ways you could ruin your relationship:
1. Poor Communication
Communication is the soul of a relationship.
Love may get a relationship started, but communication is needed to sustain it.
Love doesn’t bring intimacy, communication does.
It is through effective communication that you know your partner’s likes and dislikes, not through love. No matter how much you love someone, without communication, the love will wither.
It’s through communication that conflicts are settled.
Some people claim they are too busy to communicate, but that’s flimsy.
You only have time for what you make time for. If you make your relationship a priority, you’ll create time to communicate with your partner.
If you are too busy to communicate or you don’t like to communicate, and you are not ready to change, then you have no business being in a relationship.
It’s appalling how some people go AWOL for days for no justifiable reason, yet expect to have a great relationship. It doesn’t work that way.
Even if you would be busy for some days, notify your partner, and also, sending a text message can go a long way in assuring your partner that you have them in mind.
Dearth of communication can bring a beautiful relationship to its knees, especially a long distance relationship. Out of sight is out of mind sometimes.
If you want your relationship to get to its promised land, you have to take communication very seriously.
2. Taking Your Partner For Granted
You take your partner for granted when you treat them anyhow because you believe they’ll always tolerate you no matter how unfair you treat them.
Some people think they are too beautiful, intelligent, or special, so no matter how they treat their partners, they’ll always be loved.
Not everyone can endure being taken like a pinch of salt while they carry you like a bag of rice. A person with a healthy self-worth will not let themselves to be taken for granted.
3. Parasitism/Unrequited Efforts
It takes two to tango. One partner’s effort cannot sustain a relationship because relationship involves two people, it’s a partnership thing.
If the effort to keep the relationship running is one-sided, it will only lead to frustration and breakup, eventually.
A lady shared with me how she lost a very amazing guy because he was the only one doing the calling and visiting. When he got tired of it, he bowed out of the relationship. The lady was so hurt because she realized how much she loved him and he was a good guy. She still regrets it today.
As long as you were not forced into a relationship, it’s only responsible that you take an active part in making the relationship you agreed to start, work.
If you are stuck in a one-sided love, read how to unstuck yourself HERE
4. Lack of Mutual Respect
We all have an ego that doesn’t like to be hurt. I don’t believe it’s only a party that should be respected. I’m all for mutual love and mutual respect. Every human being deserves to be loved and respected.
Lack of mutual respect can ruin a relationship. Shouting at your partner, not returning calls/messages, insulting your partner, hitting your partner, not keeping to your promises, cheating, lying etc. are signs of disrespect.
Love and respect go hand in hand. You can’t claim to love someone without respecting them. Respect your partner, will you?
If you are a woman, please read How to Make Him Respect You
There is no perfect relationship anywhere. A beautiful relationship involves two people who decide not to give up on each other. There will always be quarrels, in fact, a relationship devoid of conflict is a boring one.
However, when conflicts occur, partners should swallow their pride and make an effort to reconcile.
The use of the three magic words, ‘please’, ‘thank you’ and ‘sorry’ is very crucial to having a satisfying relationship. It takes humility to use these words.
If you are too proud to apologize when you are wrong, you may ruin your relationship. A relationship where partners put their ego before the relationship cannot turn out well.
This does not mean you should let yourself be treated like trash because you want to be humble.
It means you shouldn’t lose a good person because of your pride.
I hope you won’t ruin your beautiful relationship/marriage because of these five things.