In a world that has increasingly linked love to sex, this question is crucial.
Is it possible for a man to love a woman without sleeping with her?
Growing up, I would see the older boys make it their goal to woo and chase after young, naïve virgins.
One of the common ways they always managed to get them was by saying, “If you love me, you will let me have sex with you.”
Hence, under a lot of pressure to prove their love, many girls usually let these guys have their way.
As proof that it had nothing to do with love and everything to do with adding a notch on their bedposts, these guys usually ended up jilting the girls after having sex with them.
To answer the question, YES.
A man can love a woman without having sex with her.
Love and sex are not codependent.
They are separate entities, and the same way a pornstar can have sex with another without loving them is the same way a man that loves you can choose not to have sex with you.
Let’s explore some deep truths behind this choice that is increasingly becoming strange in our world.
“Can A Man Love A Woman Without Sleeping With Her?”- 7 Deep Truths Revealed
1. He is old-fashioned
When I say he is old-fashioned, I actually mean it as a compliment.
In our times, there is so much wokeness to go around that seeing someone who holds on to such “old-fashioned” beliefs like not having sex with a lady until marriage is a breath of fresh air.
I hold the belief that sex should only occur within the confines of a marriage and I know a bunch of other guys who believe the same thing.
If you are in love with a man who doesn’t attempt to touch you sexually and you are probably worried that he doesn’t love you or find you attractive, you may just be in a relationship that holds this old-fashioned view of sex before marriage.
How do you exactly know if that is why he doesn’t attempt to have sex with you?
Examine his other beliefs.
Do they seem to be mainly conservative?
If yes, then it is obvious that you are in love with a conservative man who has old-fashioned ideas about a lot of things, and he is not sleeping with you because he wants to do things in the right way.
This doesn’t mean he doesn’t find you attractive.
In fact, beneath his cool exterior, he may be burning with so much desire for you, but he has the discipline to hold on to his old-fashioned ways.
2. He respects your boundaries
Perhaps the issue is not with him.
Have you ever considered that your body language may be one of the reasons why he doesn’t attempt to sleep with you?
Take, for example, a lady that has gone through a traumatic event like rape in the past.
She finally thinks she is over it and ready to move on fully with her life.
So, she gets a boyfriend she truly loves but freezes every time he touches her.
It is really not so obvious, but someone who loves you will notice those little changes.
Because he notices this, he may decide that you have set firm boundaries about having sex with him and choose to respect those boundaries.
For you, it may not be trauma from the past.
You may have consciously set those boundaries in place, and because he loves you, he won’t attempt to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do.
3. His religious beliefs are firmly against it
I know someone will read this particular point and derisively wonder why anyone is following religious precepts laid down ages ago in a different culture.
Well, people like me hold their religious beliefs, and for the best part, they have helped to hold us all up to a moral standard that seems to be reducing the more we get “woke.”
If your man is particularly serious about his religious beliefs, especially if he is a Christian, it shouldn’t come as a shock to you that he doesn’t want to have sexual relationships with you except within marriage.
The Bible is especially outspoken about fornication and what it does to the believer that is involved in it.
If you are involved in a relationship with someone who doesn’t just consider himself a churchgoer, then you may need to realize that the reason he is not sleeping with you is because he wants to please God.
This should help you forestall any insecure feelings you may have about him not finding you attractive enough.
4. He prioritizes emotional intimacy over physical intimacy
I had this atheist friend who would spend hours ridiculing all the religions of the world.
He would say things about morality being a farce, but he was a virgin.
He said this not because he didn’t have a girlfriend, far from it.
He was a virgin because he preferred emotional intimacy, communication, and companionship with his partner over sexual gymnastics.
He would spend hours talking to his girlfriend or just taking a stroll with her, working on poems and stories because they were both creatives.
For my friend, the choice of not having sex with the woman he loves was not induced by religious beliefs or old-fashioned views.
Rather, he preferred emotional intimacy over physical intimacy.
There are few other men like this out there.
They don’t appear to follow any strict religious creed that is against sleeping with a woman you are not married to or old-fashioned views about how relationships and courtships should proceed.
It can be very confusing if you are just starting a relationship with such a person because his reason for not having sexual intimacy with you may appear weird at first, but you will get used to his views gradually.
5. He doesn’t want sexual intimacy to spoil what you have
This is particularly true about people who started dating as besties.
There is a way sex outside the context of marriage tends to bring “see finish” into a relationship.
The guy may begin to feel like he has seen all there is to the lady.
If you are in a relationship with your best friend, he may want to avoid this by keeping your relationship sexless.
He wants to enjoy the friendship and bond you both share without getting the love waters muddied up.
This is an unpopular opinion, but it is true of some besties in love.
6. He doesn’t want to hurt you
A guy may love you so much, feel deeply about you, yet be controlled around you.
Love is not just about the butterflies you feel; most men feel a deep sense of protectiveness towards their lady.
This might be what guides how he handles his urges around you.
Just because he doesn’t want to hurt you, he may abstain from sex with you.
This may also be a result of things he has seen around him in society where ladies are used as sexual symbols.
He may also be deeply moved for you because he has sisters and wouldn’t want his sisters hurt in any way by a guy.
If this is your guy, then he is gold!
7. He doesn’t want you to think he is after sex alone
Sometimes, when you are dating a man who has shown no scruples with having sex in his past relationships, but he suddenly seems to be avoiding it with you, this could be the reason.
Guys sometimes make special allowances for the woman they love just to display how much they love her.
So, a guy who may have been sexually active in the past may decide to be celibate just because of you.
This scenario is mainly applicable in a relationship between a sexually active man and a lady who is a virgin or naïve.
To avoid looking like he is exploiting her, the man may decide to avoid sexual intimacy for a period.
There are several reasons why a man can love a woman without sleeping with her.
It’s important to remember that every individual and relationship is different, and there is no “one-size-fits-all” answer to this question.
However, it’s certainly possible for a man to love a woman without sleeping with her and for a romantic relationship to be based on emotional intimacy, respect, and mutual affection rather than sexual activity.