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12 Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

12 Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

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Are you a lady more drawn to older men, or have you just found out you’re beginning to develop feelings for an older man?

If that’s the case, you need to know all involved in dating an older man because it’s quite different from dating someone your age or younger.

Dating an older man comes with its own packages, and it is crucial to know the red flags to look out for when dating an older man to avoid walking into or staying in unhealthy and toxic situations.

The following are clear red flags when dating an older man that you shouldn’t ignore.


12 Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

1. He Finds It Difficult To Apologize For Wrongs

Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

No one is above mistakes, and apologizing to your partner when you feel you have offended them shouldn’t be such a big deal.

When he finds it difficult to admit guilt or ask for forgiveness but instead keeps stating reasons why he is correct, that’s a red flag.

You don’t want to be in a relationship where you constantly beg for forgiveness or apologize for his wrongs.

This might be because he thinks he knows better because he’s been around much longer than you have.

So he thinks he can never be wrong, so you have to listen to him and swallow whatever he says, hook, line, and sinker.


2. He Doesn’t Accept Change

Change is a constant part of life, and whether you are in a relationship or not, you need to understand that life is always changing, and so are we.

If your older partner isn’t open to new experiences but rather prefers to stick with his same old pattern and behavior even when you’ve tried to make him understand and embrace positive change, then you probably need to have a rethink.

If he refuses to acknowledge that people evolve and fails to see the need for growth in the relationship, you don’t want to be stuck with such a partner.

Most times, older men might disapprove of change because they are already comfortable with their life, and any change to that might seem like a disruption.

But a man who loves you and isn’t proud should be open to seeing life from your perspective as long as it isn’t negative or harmful.


3. He Conceals Vital Information

Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

Withholding vital information is a clear red flag that he isn’t committed to the relationship.

Sometimes, older men conceal important information about who they are, which leaves you with little room to make quality decisions.

That’s why you must be observant and smart about your decisions, especially when you know your clock is ticking.

Show no sign of desperation, or you’ll risk falling victim to such situations.

They can always take advantage of your desperation.

Some of these men already have kids and partners they’re with but don’t want you to know about.

And others have families in other countries that they would never want you to know about.

You need to ensure you know important and valuable details about the person you’re with.

Get to know him much better and ask critical questions.


4. He Does Not Trust And Respect Your Decisions

It is necessary for the person you’re with to respect and trust your ability to make the right decision.

If he treats you as he would treat a child, you need to pay attention to that.

While it is okay for some older men to want to pamper, nurture and take care of you, others will want to use their age and your lack of experience to take advantage of you.

You need first to check in to be sure that’s how he treats people his age too.

If it turns out that way, it might just be his personality and something you can work on if you’re uncomfortable.


5. He Is Not Emotionally Available

It might be because he has been wounded emotionally and isn’t ready to open up to someone else.

You have to be observant if he has a negative attitude towards his ex or women in general.

Maybe he has been deceived, manipulated, cheated on, or lied to previously, so he is resentful.

It will be difficult for a man who has experienced such to express genuine love.

You need to look for clues showing he’s intentionally working on himself.

You should speak to him about it; perhaps he needs more time to heal.


6. He Suffers From Low Self-Esteem

Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

Not many women know this, but older men also suffer from low self-esteem.

This could be from past or present failure in career, marriage, or life, in general.

It could also be a lack of a vision for his life, or he’s just stagnant.

You should look out for this dating red flag when dating older men.

You don’t want a partner who’s depressed and isn’t looking for ways to come out of it.

Dating a guy who’s depressed is not a pleasant feeling unless it’s something you can cope with.

Who knows, if you stay a little longer, you might be the next.


7. He Still Has Feelings For His Wife Or Ex

When a guy takes satisfaction in the attention he receives from his ex, that’s a sure red flag that he isn’t invested in that relationship and is just using you to enjoy the moment.

If he’s frequently reaching out to them or giving them the liberty to access him at all times, then that indicates he still has feelings for them, which needs to be addressed.


8. He Lacks Emotional Maturity

Emotional maturity definitely doesn’t come with age.

Emotionally matured people are those that have mastered and are mastering the act of controlling their emotions.

Many older men out there look 40 or 50 but don’t act their age.

Some of them are still stuck in their ways.

They remain stuck in their toxic behavior from when they were teenagers.


9. He Never Accepts Blame

He would rather blame you for a fault of his or your mistakes than own up to his.

When you find yourself dating an older man with such behavior, he will frustrate you with blame game.


10. He Is Narcissistic

Red Flags When Dating An Older Man

It is crucial for every woman to know and be able to recognize the signs of a narcissistic man and flee when they see it.

If you have noticed that he is narcissistic in any way, it is a big red flag, and you need to run as far as you can.


11. He Is Proud

Even though he is older than you, since he claims to love you now, he must also value and respect you.

If he keeps belittling you and showing signs of pride, that is a red flag.

You may notice that he is unresponsive to you when you try to joke with him or just have a nice time with him.

As long as you are being respectful and wise about it, he should respond to you with enthusiasm.

If he fails to do so but chooses to sit on a high horse instead, it is a red flag because it shows that the relationship will be tense and void of fun.

It also shows that he is not willing to see you as an equal, and that could be dangerous.


12. He Tries To Manipulate You

Some older men specifically prefer younger women for wicked reasons.

They believe a younger woman is naive and less informed, thus, can be easily swayed around and manipulated.

If you are dating an older man, you need to be older and smarter in your thinking.

Detect and pick any sign of manipulation from him and call it out immediately.

If he has no reasonable explanation or keeps doing it, that’s a red flag, and you need to leave the relationship.

Always keep in mind that whoever your preference is for a relationship, either older or younger men, you shouldn’t use their age against them.

Instead, look out for character, beliefs, and shared values.






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