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Don’t Be Fooled! 9 Signs He Is Stringing You Along

Don’t Be Fooled! 9 Signs He Is Stringing You Along

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“Tonight I can write the saddest lines. I loved her, and sometimes she loved me too.”– Pablo Neruda

You have just met this wonderful guy…

He is handsome, intelligent, witty, and has a sense of humor that you can relate to.

You are excited because he seems interested in you.

At least, it feels that way, sometimes.

Like Pablo Neruda, you love him, but you only feel like he loves you sometimes.

Beneath the surface of your great conversations with him, there is this nagging feeling that something is not right that you can’t pinpoint.

You sometimes feel like he is not as interested in you as he makes it seem.

In fact, the horrifying thought that he may just be stringing you along lurks in the back of your mind.

When this thought comes, you shake it off and chalk it off as being an overthinker and trying to find something negative when things are going fine.

It is important that you know with certainty whether he is interested in you or just stringing you along before you get so into him that you may find it difficult to deal with the reality.

To help you come to terms with reality sooner rather than later, we have taken the liberty of curating a list of the unmistakable signs he is stringing you along.

Come along, let’s find out what the jury has to say about that particular guy.

9 Unmistakable Signs He Is Stringing You Along

1. He doesn’t call you his girlfriend

signs he is stringing you along

This is one of the most common signs a guy is stringing you along.

He finds it difficult to put a name to whatever relationship that is between the both of you.

Just think about it…

If a guy is truly interested in you, he would be eager to call you his girlfriend.

I see this all the time…

Guys who are interested in a lady may refer to her as his babe, even when she hasn’t agreed to be in a relationship with them.

So, if he avoids every opportunity to put a tag on the relationship you are having, then you are actually in a situationship.

A friend of mine once had this guy in her life.

They had top-notch chemistry and for the first time in my life, I was seeing my friend stay on long calls with a guy without complaining.

She would even be the one to call most of the time.

This continued for a long time until one day, while she was telling me about him, I asked her an important question…

“Have you given your relationship a tag, or are you guys just vibing along?”

Well, her response or lack of response showed a lot to me.

While the guy was eager to do boyfriend things with her, he wasn’t ready to be called her boyfriend, and he didn’t want a girlfriend.

Hence, my friend was entangled in a situationship.

When you are uncertain about your particular role in someone’s life, it is important to try to talk things over to clarify things.

Some ladies may say they don’t want to be forward by initiating the conversation, but there is really nothing wrong in trying to define your relationship with someone.

Defining your relationship will help you set necessary boundaries and avoid getting unnecessarily heartbroken over a guy who never planned on committing to a relationship with you.

Even if he tells you he loves you and the nagging feeling persists, there are other signs you can always check for…

2. His attention fluctuates

signs he is stringing you along


Does he randomly blow hot and cold?

Does he go quiet for some time and suddenly pop back into your life like he was never gone?

If this is what is happening in your relationship, it is a major sign he may be stringing you along.

When he pulls his disappearing act, you are left feeling worried, sad, angry, and hurt.

You don’t know why he decides to ghost you or treat you coldly, but you know he is doing it.

It leaves you confused and hurt even while you keep trying to reach out to him.

Then, when you are ready to let him go, he just pops back into your life, and the euphoria at having him overshadows the hurt, anger, and confusion that you felt.

Note that I am not talking about those situations where he has a real reason for his disappearance…

Like a naval officer aboard a ship, a soldier being deployed on a mission, or an undercover agent on a deep-cover mission.

I am talking of those situations where you know that he is intentionally ghosting you because he is online on social media but not replying to your texts or picking up your calls.

If he treats you this way, you can safely conclude that he is playing with you.

3. He doesn’t like to talk about the future

signs he is stringing you along

A major sign he loves you?

He talks about the future and basically includes you in his plans for the future.

When a guy gets evasive every time you try to talk about the future, it is a sign that he isn’t serious with you.

Some people may prefer to live in the moment and let tomorrow take care of itself.

However, this doesn’t apply to a relationship.

When people enter romantic relationships, they usually do so because they believe that they have met someone with whom they can plan a future…

Except for the occasional guy who either has commitment issues or is just a serial playboy.

When a guy evades talking about the future with you while leaving little riddles here and there that could be interpreted as him wanting a future with you, it is a sign he is stringing you along.

He is leaving a breadcrumb trail for you to follow while maintaining an aloofness from you.

Maybe he sees you as a plan B to fall back on if he fails to get the girl he actually likes, or you are just a conquest to be added to the tally of victories he has had over females.

One thing is sure, though…

He doesn’t see a future with you, and you shouldn’t waste your time expecting what he sees to change.

4. You get that feeling that he is only interested in sex

signs he is stringing you along
Sometimes, people get into relationships without any serious commitment.

They just want to have sex, and while I have my misgivings about this, if it is between two consenting adults, it is their choice.

It is fine as long as the person you are involved with knows what they are getting into.

Some people just want a regular sex partner.

However, if you started your relationship believing that he was interested in more than just steady sex with you but it now seems like the only time he is excited is when he is having sex with you, then it is a sign he is stringing you along.

How do you know if this is the case?

Reflect on your relationship…

Does it seem like he is uninterested in your life, hopes, and dreams?

Does he seem uninterested in hanging out with you, except it will lead to sex?

If the answer to these questions is yes, then you need to let this sink right into your skull…

He is stringing you along!!

Don’t be used by some random guy, Queen!

5. He doesn’t put in any effort

A good and successful relationship requires effort from both parties and when it seems one-sided, it is an obvious sign that one person has checked out.

How do you know a guy is stringing you along?

It feels like you are the only one trying to make things work in the relationship.

He doesn’t call or text you except when he wants something from you.

In fact, you can always accurately guess that he wants sex whenever he texts or calls you.

He doesn’t show any interest in your life.

He hardly helps you with anything, and when he does, he does it grudgingly.

It’s usually obvious to everyone else that he isn’t interested in a relationship with you.

Everyone else except you.

6. He enjoys his life without you in it

signs he is stringing you along

When you see a guy who is comfortable going long periods without being in touch with you, it is a sign that he can absolutely live his life without you.

In fact, it may be a sign that he enjoys his life without you.

There is nothing wrong with this, however, it is a sign he doesn’t love you.

When a man falls in love, he wants to spend time with his woman.

This doesn’t mean that he would spend all his free time with you…

However, he won’t go for long periods without spending time with you.

If he treats you this way, it is a sign he is stringing you along and doesn’t really care about you as much as he sometimes makes you think.

If it seems like he enjoys his life better without you in it, don’t cling to him.

Do yourself a favor and learn to enjoy life without him.

7. He doesn’t spend time with you

The fact is that almost all of us live busy lives.

We have deadlines to meet up with and so much work to do while chasing the bag every single day.

Amidst all of these, it can be so hard to make time out for those we care about.

Regardless of this difficulty, a man who is truly in love with you will make time out for you.

If he stays long periods without spending time with you, it is a sign that he may not be into you as much as he makes you believe.

If he is not spending time with you, it is a sign that he is setting you aside because he doesn’t feel the same way about you.

In this situation what he does is that he occasionally spends some time with you to ensure that you don’t feel totally neglected.

He starves you off his presence and then shows up just long enough to make you even more hooked on him.

It becomes more like a game to him, and this leads me to the next sign…

8. He plays mind games on you

Mind games are terrible for relationships.

Really, what is the point of playing hard to get when you know you don’t care about the person?

What happened to being honest?

Ooh, you don’t want to hurt her?

Brutal honesty is a lot better than stringing a lady along when you know you don’t love her.

A major sign he is stringing you along is that he starts playing mind games with you.

He would play hard to get to improve his appeal to you and then he would give you just a little attention to make sure you remain hooked on him.

Sometimes, he would go out of his way to make you feel jealous.

Just because he can.

Just because he loves to see how much power he has over you.

He loves jerking your chain and keeps on stringing you along because you make him feel so powerful.

9. He shows interest in other women right in front of you

signs he is stringing you along

Some women think it is normal for a man to have wandering eyes because they have occasionally caught their partners showing inappropriate interest in another woman.

However, most men with wandering eyes usually try to hide the fact that they are checking out other women.

But he doesn’t.

He makes it really obvious to you that he is interested in other women.

He shows so much interest in knowing more about your female friends.

And when he meets them, he may attempt to flirt with them.

Even while you are on dates, he may zone out and compliment other ladies right in front of you.

This is a major sign he is stringing you along and has no serious intentions for your relationship.

Ultimately, when a man is stringing you along, he doesn’t outrightly treat you terribly.

He occasionally throws in some romance, attention, and compliments to keep you hooked.

It is your responsibility to not be deceived by all of these.

If you see a combination of any of the signs above in your “boyfriend,” it is a sign he is just stringing you along.

What do you do?

Don’t be too desperate to hold on to a relationship with someone who is only stringing you along.

If you are in such a relationship, your relationship status isn’t “complicated”.

You are actually single.

Quit that relationship.

He is the “less” you should never settle for.

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