“The only really happy folks are married women and single men.”- H. L. Mencken.
Perhaps it’s fate that one of the “happiest folks on earth” should pursue the other.
To kick this off perfectly, I will start by painting a scenario that used to look like an aberration but is now getting to be a more familiar sight.
A young single man decides he wants an older woman… not just any older woman, but someone who is married.
He may claim to love her, but you know that he doesn’t love her.
You know this even when you are not particularly clear on what he really wants… and this raises the question because you have noticed this has become a trend among young single men.
Now you want to know why a single man would pursue a married woman till he gets her despite knowing her marital status.
Perhaps Mencken was on to something with that quote of his.
Maybe single men do find some form of convenience in dating married women.
In this article, we will be exploring the various reasons why single men may pursue married women tenaciously.
7 Fascinating Reasons Single Men Pursue Married Women
1. They want no-strings-attached relationships
“Why are you still single?”
You may have asked many single men this question because you may be concerned about why a seemingly mature man isn’t in a serious relationship.
However, many single men actually prefer casual relationships with no strings attached.
Many single men have casual flings instead of serious relationships because they prefer to avoid responsibilities and just enjoy themselves.
It’s not unusual for young single men to pursue married women because their needs are purely physical, and they believe it is simpler or easier to satisfy those physical desires with married women.
After all, how hard could it be to date a married woman while avoiding her husband, who doesn’t really spend time at home?
The point is that many single men believe that married women are easy pickings to satisfy their sexual desires because they don’t have any need for a deeper connection or commitment.
So, they tend to establish a symbiotic relationship that basically involves benefitting from each other.
At the expense of the husband, of course.
2. They want to be in control
Another important thing to consider is that they also feel like married women are more pliable and amenable to whatever they wish.
Hence, the usual frustration of dating a young single lady is absent from the “relationship” with a married woman.
Conflicts are easily resolved, and the man controls the relationship.
This is because, as a single who has no obligations to anyone, he feels like he is “on a moral high ground” compared to the woman who is breaking her vows to her husband.
She has everything to lose, and he has nothing to lose.
This weakness gives the single man control over the relationship, and with the threat of discovery hanging over her head, she is more submissive to control than single women are likely to be.
3. They are emotionally unavailable
Many single men who pursue married women do so because they are emotionally unavailable.
When a person finds it hard to love, he may decide that the next best thing for him is a “no-strings-attached” relationship with a married woman.
This is because married women who have extramarital affairs are generally less demanding in terms of emotional availability.
Mostly, they both know what they want from the relationship and for the most part, it is not love.
A single man may pursue a married woman because he doesn’t want to love but he wants to enjoy the fringe benefits of a romantic relationship.
4. They may feel it’s an ego boost
Now, I wonder how these sets of men think.
The fact is, some single men have attached some form of “prestige” to being able to attract married women.
This set of single guys likes to power trip.
They actively seek to date married women because these women are supposed to be both unavailable and unattainable.
It is wrong to try to poach another man’s woman, but it can feel so right for some single men.
They find the risk of being found out so thrilling that they tenaciously pursue married women.
Generally, most men would rather climb mountains or engage in risky sports.
But for some single men, it’s about the thrill of pursuing and getting married women.
Sometimes, single men even have bets within themselves concerning who gets a lady.
I am now ashamed to say it, but I used to be very close friends with guys who would usually bet on who gets to “conquer” a lady first.
In my defense, I never joined in the “sport,” but I was a willing spectator.
They would bet on who gets the lady, and after that, they will try every trick in their bag of tricks to get the lady.
This may also apply to some single men’s fixation with married women.
5. They believe married women are mature and more experienced
Single guys who pursue married women may do so because they prefer more mature and experienced women.
It is the general belief that married women are more mature and experienced than single ladies.
Some single guys would rather have an affair with a married woman because they believe that relationships with married women will be devoid of the issues that sometimes plague relationships with single women.
Married women tend to be more experienced in matters of the heart, and dating them may be significantly more peaceful initially.
However, like almost every other affair, the end differs significantly from the beginning.
6. They want sugar mummies
“Sugar mummies” is a Nigerian term that refers to older married women who pay younger single men to date them.
Many young single men pursue married women not because of love or convenience but because of the economic and financial gains of dating these married women.
Naturally, when single men date married women, they don’t need to spend so much on gifts.
However, these particular men take it a notch higher.
They get paid actively for having affairs with married women.
7. They have had challenges dating single women in the past
Women are very complex, and even the most understanding of men can only understand little about females.
Dating single women may sometimes be challenging because of their inexperience in relationships and lesser maturity.
Single ladies may sometimes be rude in how they rebuff the interest of single men.
Too many experiences of this may make a young man decide that pursuing married women is better.
I have seen so many brutal rejections in my time, and I think that has influenced my decision to remain single for now.
It’s not like I am pained… I am not; I moved on already.
My friend once dated a young lady, and he always had to walk on eggshells around her because her moods changed in lightning-fast fashion.
Let’s not forget that dating a single lady doesn’t shield you from heartbreaks.
Men who have suffered consecutive heartbreaks from single ladies may consider pursuing married women.
These are some reasons many other single men may prefer dating married women to avoid the challenges of dating single ladies.
Having sexual relationships with another man’s wife may sound fantastic as a fantasy.
However, it should be avoided.
It is never just as simple as having an affair and avoiding detection.
You also need to consider the consequences of your actions and how you would feel if someone did the same thing to your wife in the future.