There’s nothing like the feeling of your heart sinking as you start to notice signs of disgust in your husband’s actions or words.
This is a man who vowed to love, cherish, and support you in all your endeavors.
So how could he possibly be disgusted by you?
As hard as it is to come to terms with this possibility, recognizing the signs can help you understand and address any underlying issues in your marriage.
Here are some potential signs that your husband is disgusted by you:
11 Signs Your Husband is Disgusted by You: Is He Over You?
1. He Makes Condescending or Hurtful Comments
One of the most noticeable signs that your husband is feeling disgust towards you is how he talks to you.
The Bible says, ”Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks”.
And this couldn’t be truer in marriage.
When you love your spouse, you are likely to say loving words to them.
When you are pleased with them, you are likely to affirm and encourage them.
When you are angry, it’s natural for your words to reflect how you feel, especially if you are not high on the self-control scale.
So, when there’s disgust in your husband’s heart towards you, what do you expect?
He’ll spew words that eat into your self-esteem, make you feel worthless, and make you question if he ever loved you.
These comments can be explicit, such as direct insults, or they can be subtle, like sarcastic remarks that leave you feeling small and unappreciated.
And they can be about your appearance, abilities, aspirations, or even your character.
It’s normal for couples to have disagreements, but when your husband consistently belittles you or makes you feel inferior, it’s a problem.
This is so sad, considering the effect words, especially from people we love, have on our total well-being.
I can’t begin to imagine how it would feel to constantly be put down by the person who is supposed to uplift you.
2. He Avoids Physical Intimacy with You
I’m sure you know that physical intimacy is an important aspect of any marriage.
It’s a way for couples to connect on a deeper level and show love and affection towards each other.
If your husband is disgusted by you, he may start rejecting or avoiding physical intimacy altogether.
This could be in the form of not wanting to hold hands, hug, kiss, or be intimate with you.
He may also start making excuses for why he can’t be physically intimate with you, like being too tired or having a headache.
If your husband was the one who usually initiated physical intimacy, and now he’s showing little to no interest, it could be a sign that he is feeling disgusted by you.
3. He Criticizes You Constantly
Constructive criticism is helpful in a marriage when it comes from a place of love and genuine concern.
But if your husband is constantly criticizing you, it could be a sign of disgust.
He may criticize the way you look, dress, cook, clean, or even how you handle certain situations.
And this criticism often comes without any positive feedback or suggestions for improvement.
After all, if he thinks you are not doing something well, he should offer suggestions for how you can improve, not just insulting remarks.
But because you disgust him, he finds it difficult to even see the good in you and anything you do let alone offer constructive criticism.
4. He Avoids Spending Time with You
Marriage is about spending quality time together and enjoying each other’s company.
For a man who is disgusted by his wife, the last thing he wants is to spend time in her presence.
I mean, how can you spend time with someone you can’t stand?
So, he may come home late from work or even spend more time at the office just to avoid being around you.
And when he is at home, he may choose to do activities that don’t involve him, like watching TV alone or spending hours on his phone.
5. He Shows Little to No Interest in Your Life
Part of being in a marriage is taking an interest in your spouse’s life.
Your husband should care about what’s going on with you, ask about your day, and genuinely listen to you when you’re talking.
But if he has no interest in your life, it could be a clear sign that he is disgusted by you.
He may not even pretend to care or ask about your life, and when you try to share details with him, he may brush them off or change the subject.
6. He’s Emotionally Distant
Just as he doesn’t take an interest in your life because you disgust him, he’s not letting you into his life, too.
He’s not sharing his thoughts, feelings, or problems with you.
He’d rather do that with his friends, colleagues, family members, or side chick if he has any.
He keeps you at arm’s length, and you can feel that there is a disconnect between the two of you.
You may try to initiate deep conversations or share your feelings, but he either shuts you down or shows very little empathy.
Emotional distance in marriage can happen for different reasons, but the issue with a man who is disgusted by you is that he doesn’t care.
While you might be bothered about the disconnect between the two of you, you make an effort to fix things.
This man doesn’t care.
It even seems like he’s enjoying the disconnect, and the thought of working things out with you repulses him.
In fact, this feeling of disconnect will aid him in mistreating you because it’s hard to treat someone you are emotionally connected to with disgust.
7. He Displays Contempt for You
It involves displaying a lack of respect, admiration, or appreciation towards your partner and often comes from a place of superiority.
If your husband has contempt for you, it means that he sees himself as better than you and looks down on you.
It often manifests in the form of eye-rolling, sneering, mocking, or outright insults.
When there is disgust in a marriage, it’s not uncommon to see signs of contempt, too.
8. He’s Always Annoyed
Of course, you don’t expect your husband to always be happy and never get annoyed.
But when the slightest things you do, say, or even your mere presence seems to irritate him, he is disgusted by you.
He may even find petty reasons to start arguments with you or pick on your every move.
This behavior shows that he is not in a good place emotionally and sees you as the cause of his annoyance.
With you, he is never happy.
But when he is with other people, even right in your presence, he might be laughing like someone who just won the lottery.
He might even be the life of the party, making other people laugh while he makes you miserable.
9. He’s Always Comparing You to Others
Have you ever heard him say, ”Why can’t you be more like [insert name]?” or “You should learn from [insert name].”
If he is making constant comparisons between you and other people, it’s a sign he is not satisfied with what you bring to the table.
He is comparing you with someone he admires or sees as being better than you in some way.
Comparisons can be hurtful, especially when they are meant to put you down and make you feel inadequate.
For a man who is disgusted by his wife, making such comparisons comes naturally because he doesn’t see value in what he has at home.
10. You Just Have a Gut Feeling
Sometimes, you may not have any concrete evidence that your husband is disgusted by you, but you just have this gut feeling.
Trust me, women, especially those who are not paranoid, have a strong intuition.
You can’t shake off the constant nagging feeling that something is wrong in your marriage and with how he sees you.
Trust your instincts, and don’t ignore your feelings.
Because if you feel like something is off in your marriage or that your husband may be disgusted by you, chances are, there is some truth to it.
11. He Says It To Your Face!
Some men are not subtle about their feelings, and they will come right out and tell you that they are disgusted by you.
This may happen during an argument or even in a casual conversation.
Regardless of when it happens, if your husband tells you that he is disgusted by you, please believe him.
It’s not something to brush off as just words said in the heat of the moment.
A man who truly loves and respects his wife would never utter such hurtful words to her, no matter what.
Disgust is such a strong emotion, and for him to openly express it towards you?
What Can You Do About It?
Being in a marriage where your husband is disgusted by you is emotionally draining, hurtful, and unhealthy.
You shouldn’t have to be with someone who makes you feel like you’re not worthy or that they are doing you a favor by being married to you.
So, if this is your reality, what can you do about it?
1. Address the issue:
Don’t sweep it under the rug or pretend everything is fine.
Address it and find out what is causing your husband’s disgust.
It could be something you are doing, or it might have nothing to do with you at all.
Have an honest, although tough, conversation with your husband about how his behavior makes you feel.
2. Seek counseling:
If talking to your husband doesn’t work, apparently, the issue has gone beyond what the two of you can handle.
So, seek professional help.
A counselor will help you dig deep and find the root cause of your husband’s disgust and guide you on how to work through it as a couple.
3. Work on yourself:
If your husband’s disgust is related to something you are doing, work on changing it.
Not for him, but for yourself.
4. Take care of yourself:
Don’t let your husband’s disgust bring you down.
Focus on taking care of yourself and doing things that make you happy.
5. Set boundaries:
If you are used to keeping quiet and letting your husband treat you with contempt or disgust, it’s time to speak up, and set boundaries.
Make it clear that you will not tolerate such behavior, and if he continues to disrespect you, there will be consequences.
If he still cares about you or the marriage, this should set him straight.
6. Make a decision:
If your husband’s disgust towards you has been going on for a long time, and he is unwilling to work on it or seek help, then perhaps it’s time to consider leaving.
You have the right to decide whether you want to stay or leave.
Being in a marriage where there is disgust and contempt is toxic.
Consider your options carefully and decide what is best for you and your well-being.
The Bible commands husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her.
There is no room for disgust or contempt in such a love.
If you’ve done your own part and your husband is still disgusted by you, then your husband is disobeying God!