Have you ever seen a woman who has refused to leave a man who treats her badly?
In fact, in many cases, it’s a woman who seems to deserve better who keeps going back to the same man who treats her poorly.
She’s beautiful, smart, has a great personality, and is kind (except to herself in this situation).
If you are kind to yourself, you won’t like a man who treats you like dirt.
Why do women like men who treat them badly?
Why Do Women Like Men Who Treat Them Badly?
1. Low Self-Esteem
Your self-esteem is the amount of value you place on yourself, and this will go a long way to determine the quality of men you will attract.
It’ll also determine what you’ll tolerate and how you’ll be treated.
If your self-esteem is low, you’ll have poor boundaries and an inability to say “no” when a man treats you badly because you don’t feel worthy of love and affection.
So you stay with any guy who shows you the slightest bit of attention.
You are more likely to be attracted to what you’re familiar with; it’s human nature.
If all the women in your family grew up being mistreated by men, it might feel normal for you to accept that kind of treatment from a partner.
The scary thing about familiarity is that even though you know it’s negative and you shouldn’t desire it, you still end up making choices that lead you back to the situation.
It’s a really toxic cycle that can only be broken when you make a conscious effort to step out of your comfort zone and seek healthier relationships.
3. Lack of Experience
Experience, they say, is the best teacher, and it’s true.
Some women’s first experience with love is with a man who treated them badly, and they’ve just carried on from there.
These women don’t know what it feels like to be in a respectful, loving relationship because all they’ve ever experienced is hurt and pain.
So they continue the cycle of accepting poorly treated men because that’s all they know.
4. Fear of Being Alone
Loneliness is not fun, especially when all your friends are in relationships or married, and at every family occasion, you are asked, “When are you getting married?” and it gets tiring to always respond with an “I don’t know”.
So when a man comes along, even if he treats you badly, you might be afraid to let him go because at least he’s there.
You tell yourself that any relationship is better than being alone.
I’m not judging you.
We all want to love and be loved.
We want partners who can support us, grow with us, and share our lives.
But you are better off waiting for a man who genuinely respects and cherishes you rather than wasting your time with someone who doesn’t appreciate you.
Easier said than done?
I agree, but it’s true.
5. Hope of Change
This is probably the most common reason why women like men who treat them badly.
They keep hoping that they will change and become the loving, caring men they deserve.
Unfortunately, this rarely happens.
People don’t change unless they want to, and even then, it takes a lot of effort and self-awareness.
So if a guy has been treating you badly for months or years, he won’t suddenly wake up one day as the perfect man.
And before you think you can change a man, let me tell you a secret: you can’t change anyone but yourself.
6. Martyr Complex
Some women see themselves as martyrs in relationships; they believe their partners’ happiness is more important than their own.
So even if a man treats them badly, they will endure it because they think it’s what good wives and girlfriends do – sacrifice for their partner’s happiness.
God forbid that kind of sacrifice!
Yes, compromise is essential in any relationship, but liking a man who treats you badly is just silly.
7. Madam Fixer
Some women see themselves as saviors, always looking for broken men to fix and nurture back to health.
These women think they’re the only ones who can save their troubled partners and change them for the better.
But this doesn’t always work out; in fact, it rarely does.
Instead, these women end up hurt and disappointed when their partners don’t change or leave them for someone else.
If you are always liking men who need fixing, there might be something going on with you that needs fixing, too.
Sorry if that hurts, but it’s true.
There must be something wrong if you keep liking men who treat you badly because they need fixing.
8. Passionate Relationships
The high intensity and passion of these relationships can be addicting.
Sure, the man treats you badly most of the time, but when things are good, it feels like nothing else matters.
You get caught up in the emotions and the thrill of it all, and before you know it, you’re hooked.
But passion fades, and when it does, what’s left?
Hurtful words, disrespect, and a broken heart.
9. Low Expectations
When you have low expectations of yourself and your relationships, you’ll accept anything that comes your way.
The law of attraction states that what you put out into the universe is what you’ll attract.
So, if you expect to be treated badly, that’s what you’ll get.
But when you have high expectations and standards for yourself, it becomes easier to recognize and reject men who treat you poorly.
You know your worth, and you won’t settle for anything less than the best.
10. Unresolved Trauma
Often, women who have been mistreated by men in the past carry that baggage into their future relationships.
They don’t take time to heal from the hurt and trauma before jumping into another relationship.
This unresolved trauma can make them feel like they don’t deserve anything better, which leads them back to accepting poor treatment from men.
Society often gives men a pass for bad behavior, labeling it as “alpha male” or “confident.”
This toxic masculinity can make some women feel like they need to be with a man who is dominant, aggressive, and controlling to validate their femininity.
But true masculinity is about being respectful, kind, and supportive.
A man who treats you badly is not a real man.
12. The Sunk Cost Fallacy
Ever heard of the sunk cost fallacy?
It’s when people continue to invest in something because they’ve already put so much time, money, or effort into it—even if it’s not worth it.
This can happen in relationships, where someone stays with a partner who treats them badly because they’ve already put so much time and effort into it.
I know that it hurts to leave a relationship that you’ve invested so much in, but sometimes it’s necessary for your own well-being.
Don’t let the sunk cost fallacy keep you trapped in a toxic relationship.
13. Misconception of Love
You know, some women say that a man doesn’t love them if he doesn’t treat them badly.
They have been conditioned to believe that love must come with pain or struggle.
They may think that if they aren’t constantly fighting for the relationship, then it’s not real love.
I really don’t think any woman loves to like a guy who treats here badly, but something must be wrong somewhere that makes a woman like men who treats her badly.
Women are not masochists; they don’t enjoy being treated badly.
And if you do, you need to get help.