Flirting is cool.
Flirting is fun.
Flirting is exciting.
And being married doesn’t mean your flirting days are over.
Marriage should not deny you the joy of flirting.
Dear married man, it’s okay to flirt.
Buttttttttt only with your wife.
Yes, in fact, flirting in marriage is healthy and can lead to more passionate love.
But if, as a woman, you find a married man flirting with you, you have to be curious.
What does he want?
What does his flirting mean?
When a married man flirts with you, it could mean any number of things.
When a Married Man Flirts with You: 11 Things It Means
1. He’s looking to boost his ego.
Flirting is a skill, and not everyone has mastered it.
Even if you have mastered it, you need confidence in yourself to make it work.
A married man may flirt with you because he wants that boost of ego, the feeling of being desirable and wanted by someone else.
It doesn’t necessarily mean he has any intentions beyond that.
So it’s less about you and more about him.
Don’t get me wrong, sis.
I bet you’re fabulous, no doubt about it, but in this case, the married dude is just looking to give his self-esteem a little boost.
You see, marriage, like any long-term relationship, can hit plateaus where things may start feeling a little stale and predictable.
The everyday routines, the responsibilities of raising a family, and all the adulting stuff can take a toll on anyone’s confidence.
So, when a married man flirts with you, it could be his way of seeking validation and excitement outside of his marriage.
I’m married, and I can tell you that if you are not intentional about keeping the spark alive, it can easily fizzle out.
2. He’s just having fun.
Some people, both men and women, are natural flirts.
They enjoy making others feel good and may not have any ulterior motives.
A married man who is a natural flirt might flirt with you because it’s just his way of interacting with people.
He may not even be aware that he’s flirting, and it could all be innocent fun for him.
He may see it as a way to brighten his day or yours without any intentions of taking things further.
I know someone who is like this, and I usually tell him that women are going to think he’s hitting on them, but he genuinely doesn’t see it that way.
He just loves making people laugh and feel good about themselves.
3. He’s unhappy in his marriage.
Not all marriages are happy ones, unfortunately.
A married man who flirts with you could be doing so because he is unhappy in his marriage and seeking attention and affection elsewhere.
He may not have any intention of leaving his wife, but the flirting could be a way for him to escape from the reality of his unhappy marriage.
If you engage him, he might be tempted to open up to you about his marital problems, and that could be the beginning of an emotional affair, especially if you are an empath.
4. He wants to make his wife jealous.
One of the things that makes a married person jealous is seeing their partner hit on someone else.
I mean, how would you feel if you saw your husband flirting with another woman in front of you?
It could be a similar situation for him.
He may be flirting with you to get a reaction out of his wife, especially if they’ve been having issues in their marriage.
It can also be a way to get her attention and make her realize that he’s still desirable in the eyes of other women.
You know, nobody wants someone who nobody else wants.
5. He’s attracted to you.
The fact that he’s married doesn’t mean he can’t find other women attractive.
He’s married, not blind, and if he’s flirting with you, you may have caught his eye, and he couldn’t resist flirting with you.
It’s not a crime to find someone else attractive, even as a married person, but it becomes a problem when he acts on that attraction.
A reasonable man knows that the right thing to do is pass a non-flirty compliment, admire from afar or keep it to himself and not flirt with another woman.
But if wishes were horses, beggars would ride.
6. He’s testing the waters.
Sometimes, even married men flirt with single women just to see how far they can go.
He’s trying the waters, and if he finds no resistance or objection from you, he might try to take it further.
But if you shut him down, he’ll know you’re not interested, and he’ll back off.
7. He sees you as a challenge.
Some men love the thrill of chasing after someone who seems unattainable.
They love treading where angels fear to go and seeing themselves as the conqueror.
If a married man is flirting with you, it could be because he sees you as a challenge and wants to see if he can win you over.
If he does, it’s likely to boost his ego.
8. He wants to relive his single days.
Some men actually miss the days of flirting and getting attention from other women.
So, being in a committed relationship makes them feel like they’re missing out on something.
These men may find themselves flirting with other women to recapture some of that feeling they had before entering into a monogamous relationship.
8. He’s in an open marriage.
An open marriage is one in which both partners are allowed to engage in extra-marital relationships.
I know it sounds outrageous, but people do it.
If the married man flirting with you mentions that he’s in an open relationship or his wife knows and approves of his behavior, then that changes the situation entirely.
It’s now up to your personal boundaries and values whether or not you want to engage in anything further with him.
9. He’s testing his desirability.
Just like how some people use dating apps to see how many matches they can get, a married man may flirt with you to test his desirability.
He wants to know if he still has that charm and can attract other women besides his wife.
You know some married men don’t receive compliments from their wives anymore, and he might be wondering if he still has the power to make people swoon.
10. He genuinely likes you.
Now, before you roll your eyes at me and say he’s still married and has no business liking anyone else, hear me out.
As much as we’d like to believe that love is a black and white issue, it’s not.
Sometimes, feelings develop unexpectedly, and he may genuinely like you despite being married.
He may even be questioning his current relationship because of his feelings for you.
That said, he still doesn’t have any business liking you since he’s married.
If he has a problem in his marriage, he should fix it and not develop feelings for another woman.
11. He wants to cheat on his wife.
Let’s not sugarcoat things here.
Some married men flirt with other women because they want to cheat on their wives.
There’s a Nigerian pidgin proverb that says, ”Na clap dance dey take start.”
This means that what may seem like innocent flirting can quickly escalate into something more.
If a married man is getting flirty with you and making advances, he has a goal in mind, and it’s not just a friendly conversation.
He wants to step out on his marriage, and you could be his target.