”Will he ever marry me or am I wasting my time?”
As much as I’d always recommend that individuals clearly define their relationships before going into them, I understand that life is dynamic and may not always happen that way.
Sometimes, people find themselves in relationships and are unsure where it’s headed.
They may not even be sure if the relationship is official or if they’re just playing around.
So it is more or less like they’re in a situationship.
They know they’re in a relationship with their partner, but they can’t say for sure if there’s a future in it or not.
If you are in a relationship like that, you may have many questions, including the question, “Will he ever marry me, or am I wasting my time?”
Asking this question clarifies that marriage is in the plan and you would like your relationship to get there.
Unfortunately, you’re not sure if your partner shares the same intentions.
Determining if your partner will ever marry you may not be very easy because people and situations differ.
But it should not be rocket science, either.
By observing certain signs and taking a few actions, you can determine if he will marry you or if you are wasting your time.
“Will He Ever Marry Me Or Am I Wasting My Time?”: 7 Factors To Consider
The first thing to be critically considered in a situation like this is your partner’s past behavior.
Consider his history in previous relationships and his level of commitment to his previous partners.
His track record can guide you to answer the question in your heart.
It is quite unrealistic to expect commitment from someone who has a track record of not being committed.
I’m not disputing the argument that people can change, but the truth is that many times, they don’t.
A man’s past pattern can provide much insight into his future actions.
Another way you can know if your relationship has a future or if you are wasting your time is by observing your shared values.
People may go into relationships even when they’re obviously not compatible and do not agree on many important things.
But they may often not have plans for the relationship to progress into marriage.
While you may see your differences as trivial and believe they can be managed in marriage, your partner may not share the same thoughts.
There is a high chance that your partner will not marry you if your long-term aspirations and goals do not align.
This does not necessarily mean that they don’t love you.
The relationship may just not work out because of the huge gaps that exist between you two.
3. His communication
What your partner says can give an insight into his plans for your relationship.
Listening to his communication can give a lot away, but his silence on certain key areas can also be a pointer.
Assess his readiness to talk about the future with you and how expressive he is with his plans.
Is he constantly avoiding conversations that have to do with future plans and marriage?
Or does he suddenly become uncomfortable when you initiate conversations about marriage and ask him about his plans for the relationship?
These red flags clearly show that you are both on different pages.
He may not be a bad person; he may just have different plans and mindsets or envision something different for his life.
It is crucial to pay keen attention to your partner’s responses to marriage-related topics.
4. His actions
As you already know, words are empty if not backed by actions.
If your partner’s words reveal that he does not plan to marry you, that’s quite direct and easy to conclude on.
But even if his words show some level of commitment and seriousness, his actions still have to match up.
If he claims he wants to get married to you, but his actions prove otherwise, it may be safer for you to believe his actions.
It is important that his actions align with his words and you see a good level of consistency in his behavior.
This can help you know if you are wasting your time or not.
Assess his actions for all the positive signs like respect, love, and effort.
Introducing you to family, friends, and other important people in his life can also indicate that he sees a future with you.
Generally, observing his attitude towards you and the relationship and evaluating how much effort he is willing to put into the relationship can reveal much to you.
As ladies, sometimes we may look the other way when we see unfavorable signs, but the truth is that when we see those red flags, we recognize them.
Things like your partner’s unwillingness to work through challenges with you, openly communicate, make compromises, and generally invest in the relationship can mean that you’re wasting your time.
Age and status play a huge role in marriage compatibility in many cultural contexts.
Success and stability also matter in many cases.
If a man is still struggling or doesn’t feel comfortable enough, he may not think about marriage or even plan for it anytime soon.
This is something you should consider, as timelines can determine a lot, especially in a major life event like marriage.
6. Your intuition
The truth is that sometimes, we already know these things because our intuition tells us.
If you are connected to God and pray often about your relationship, you can get led by the divine and know if the relationship is headed for marriage.
If you keep feeling uneasy and uncomfortable, like something is wrong, then maybe it’s because something actually is.
Trust your intuition and seek to explore them further, especially if they tell you that something is wrong.
7. Know what you want
Having considered all the factors above, you most likely already know if you’re wasting your time or not because those factors are a great guide.
The next thing you need to do is make a decision.
Your decision should be based on what you want for your life.
If you have seen positive and convincing signs that he will marry you, you may want to observe further and continue with the relationship.
But if all the signs are negative and you believe you are wasting your time, you may want to reevaluate your commitment and rethink your decisions.
Relationships thrive when both parties have a mutual goal, and the efforts are reciprocated.
Ultimately, unless you have some form of mystical powers, there is no surefire way to know someone’s intentions and predict the future.
The best you can do is work with the signs you see and be guided by them.
Communication helps a great deal to help you evaluate if the relationship aligns with your long-term goals and values.