What are the signs you are dating a mature man?
As a natural phenomenon, women tend to get mature faster than men.
It is a progression from childhood through the teenage years to adulthood.
If you can recall from the earlier stages of your life, boys always acted childishly and kept embarrassing themselves in front of everybody.
They’re also the ones who struggle with getting a grasp of and understanding both their emotions and the emotions of people around them.
It is quite sad that some of these boys never got to mature even as they grew into men.
They just became emotionally immature men who are confused about issues in relationships and are scared of commitment.
Nothing good comes out of being in a relationship with an immature man.
He’ll just end up frustrating the woman coupled with the fact that his insecurities will cause the relationship to crash before it even kicks off.
It is both a chore and a pain to be with an emotionally immature man and women who have experienced this can relate.
Permit me to say that maturity has no particular age it sets in.
Maturity is independent of age.
However, some characteristics are peculiar to mature men and once you see these traits in your man, count yourself lucky.
Let’s take a look at some of the signs that you’re dating a mature man.
13 Signs You’re Dating a Mature Man
1. He has a good relationship with the people around him
Although this is mentioned often as one of the common signs of an emotionally mature man, the implications cannot be stressed enough.
Any man who can maintain good relationships with the people around him can easily do the same when he’s in a romantic relationship.
It’s normal for guys to have good friends with who they have something in common.
But it takes only a mature man to be truly close to the people he cares about.
Most times, you don’t need to look far to see how much he values and cares for these people because it’s just clear from the way he talks about them and to them.
He always has compliments and nice words for and about them, makes out time for them no matter how busy his schedule is, and respects them.
If a man has nothing good to say about everyone around him; everyone is his enemy, no one understands him, that’s a red flag right there!
He doesn’t need to be friends with everyone but if he can’t get along with the majority of people around him, what’s the assurance that he’ll be a good partner to you?
What makes you special or different from the other people he can’t get along with?
2. He forgives more
When he forgives and lets go of something that he ordinarily would hold onto, it’s a sign of maturity on his end.
You’ll agree with me that forgiveness is not an easy feat. It needs individual growth to be achievable.
The first step towards becoming more forgiving is to be open-minded and more understanding.
Learn how to control your anger and how to not hold grudges as well.
It is very easy for a man to lash out at you for even the tiniest offences and sometimes, without any reasons.
However, a man who is working hard on his level of tolerance and general behavior can be said to be an emotionally mature man.
Petty men are immature.
They’re the ones who always get back at everyone for every little offence.
They have a fragile ego that can’t tolerate being hurt.
So, in order to protect their ego, they must do something to hurt people who hurt them, no matter how insignificant.
3. He shows feelings
Even though men are taught to suppress their feelings (under the false disguise of it being a sign of strength), emotionally mature men express their feelings appropriately.
They’re aware of the fact that against acting strong and tough, accepting and welcoming their feelings are the real signs of maturity.
In addition, they understand the power of communication and the ability to share things with their partners in relationships.
Your man is mature if he doesn’t have any difficulties talking about his dreams and fears, and expressing his feelings to you.
If he’s not, he wouldn’t have any business showing you that vulnerable side of himself.
5. He respects differences
One of the biggest signs you’re dating a mature man is his ability to respect differences because it’s more like a hard trait to acquire.
Some people find it easy to praise and respect things that are different from the norm but most of us have to put in a lot of work to be able to attain that height of complete tolerance and acceptance of what’s different from what we’re used to.
A mature man knows the importance of respecting the differences and diversities of humans across the globe.
If he doesn’t show any signs of disrespect towards lifestyles and preferences that are different from the norm that he’s used to, it is a top sign of maturity.
6. He creates space for you
When we talk about creating space, we’re referring to being available, present, and open to having conversations with you.
And that’s one of the things a mature man does for you.
Whenever it feels like the walls are closing in and running away from you is an easy way out, he stays put, doesn’t judge you, and is a source of emotional support to you when you need him.
Because you have grown to become a part of him, he takes your pain as his and is there with you every step of the way to comfort you and make you feel better.
He lets you be whenever you need space for yourself and doesn’t get uncomfortable whenever you want to hang out with your friends.
A mature man is not clingy, obsessed with you or possessive of you.
He doesn’t make you the centre of his life/his life doesn’t revolve around you.
He doesn’t choke you with his presence in your life.
He loves that you have a life outside of him; he also has a life outside of you.
7. He avoids drama
Your man’s level of maturity will be evident from your fights with him.
Observing his behavior then will teach you a lot about him.
A mature man will be calm and even admit if he’s wrong.
He may also prefer to remain silent rather than banter with you.
Whether he’s mad at you or not, he refrains from yelling at you or calling you names because he respects you a lot.
Whenever you’re riled up, he offers solutions to the problems and tries to get you to be calm.
An emotionally mature man is ready to do anything to avoid unnecessary arguments and drama.
One of the signs you’re dating a mature man is that he prioritizes peace and his relationship with you over his ego.
An immature man would risk losing you than apologize for his wrongs.
8. He knows how to take care of himself
You’re dating a mature man if he knows just the right way to take care of himself and is intentional about it.
He doesn’t need to be perfectly neat but his surrounding doesn’t look like a dumpsite either.
I’ve heard some women complain about their men not flushing the toilet after taking a dump!
Oh. I even have a firsthand experience on a plane four years ago.
This middle-aged man used the toilet and didn’t flush until one of the air hostesses called him out.
The women on the plane said, “That’s what he does at home. It’s his wife who cleans up after him.”
If he weren’t doing that at home, he probably wouldn’t do it in the public.
I understand that a woman can work wonders in a man’s life and make him take care of himself better.
This is why most men look better when they get married.
However, it shouldn’t be like taking care of a full-grown baby.
You shouldn’t have to always tell your man to brush his teeth, have a shower, make himself clean etc.
You don’t want to be his mommy.
9. He is open to growth
Someone mature emotionally will be open to growth and learning new things.
Why hold on to old systems and patterns that are not beneficial when you know that they just keep leading to a constant cycle of problems?
He’ll ask questions and seek advice from people who are better than him on issues that he’s not sure of their answers to.
Never will he show he’s ashamed of not being good at a particular thing because he knows that nobody is good at all things.
It takes a great deal of strength and honesty to admit that you’re not good enough and admitting this is the first step towards working on your abilities to become a better person.
10. He knows what he wants
One of the major signs you’re dating a mature man is that he knows what he wants.
A mature man isn’t confused or tossed to and fro by the wind of family, friends, or society’s opinions on what he should want for his life and in a relationship.
An immature man is one who gets involved with two or more ladies, strings them along because he doesn’t know who to choose.
He wants to have his cake and eat it.
Don’t get excited or feel like a winner if he chooses you out of his bevy of ladies.
You should wonder how he got himself in that situation in the first place.
Also, a mature man knows what he wants from his relationship with you.
11. A mature man has goals
A mature man is not an NFA (No Future Ambition).
One of the huge signs you’re dating a mature man is that he has a sense of direction in life.
He doesn’t need to have it all figured out but he’s willing to start small, take baby steps towards achieving his life goals.
An immature man doesn’t have goals that motivate him.
Even if he does, he goes about building castles in the air, impressing you with his big plans and never doing anything to show his seriousness towards achieving his dreams.
12. He’s not a mama’s boy
While a mature man loves and respects his family, he doesn’t let them decide for him.
He’s not tied to his mother’s apron strings.
He respects their suggestions but he makes his own decisions.
Immature men are not grown and confident enough to make their own decisions.
Others have to decide for them.
It’s such a pain to date someone who can’t make their own choices or one who seeks approval and validation from others.
This kind of man will leave you at the mercy of his family.
With them, he can’t defend you, so you’re on your own.
Even if they disrespect you, he can’t correct them because they don’t even respect him.
I’ve met a lot of women in this situation and I tell you, it’s not an enviable place to be in.
Real men are respected by their family and friends.
It’s the respect they have for him they transfer to you, thus, how they treat you is a reflection of how they treat him.
They don’t have to love you, but they have no choice but to respect you.
13. A mature man is not intimidated by his woman
An immature man is intimidated by his woman’s dreams, intelligence, status, and achievements.
Trust me, you don’t want to end up with his kind of man.
His insecurity and lack of self-worth will make him talk down your achievements and dreams.
He won’t support you or encourage you because you are a constant reminder of his failure.
A mature man is proud of you and is even challenged by you.
He blows your trumpet and tells everyone who cares to listen that you are his woman.
He is not a loser or lowlife who feeds off you or your money; he has something going for him as well.
But if your career path puts you in the limelight more than him, he doesn’t mind taking a back seat so you can shine.
This doesn’t mean he’s dimming his light for you to shine. It means he’s comfortable with you shining.
An immature man will ask you to choose between your dreams and him.
You don’t want to sacrifice your life goals for someone like that.
14. A mature man is not afraid of commitment
See, a mature man is not afraid of being committed to his woman all his life.
A lot of men these days prefer to be baby daddies because it’s an easier way to be a daddy and also be available to other women.
This is their choice and everyone is entitled to their choice.
However, if a man desires marriage and is afraid of commitment because his eyes are still out there, the dude is not mature!
Maturity is knowing you can’t always satisfy your desires; you can’t always have your way; you can’t do everything you feel like doing.
It’s your ability to let go of some things to achieve a greater good.
I’m not saying a mature man cannot be afraid of marriage.
He can, but it’s not because he wants to have his cake and eat it—be married and still be out there.
A mature man knows what it takes to make his home with a woman and is willing to give it all.
It won’t be easy.
That’s why it’s called maturity.
Maturity is not doing easy things but doing hard things that need to be done.
A mature man is not perfect, but he is committed to growth!