”Why is he ignoring me?”
Boyfriends are supposed to be there for you, right?
They’re the ones who will drop everything and be there when you need them.
While they might be busy at times, a good boyfriend won’t ignore his girlfriend like she doesn’t exist.
Maybe your boyfriend used to text you back right away.
He never missed a call from you.
He was always available to talk or hang out.
And now, nothing.
He’s constantly ignoring your messages and calls.
Has he lost interest? Is he depressed? Or is he avoiding you for some other reason?
Your boyfriend isn’t just your boyfriend anymore — he’s a part of your life, and for him to blow you off hurts.
Whether it was something you did or a problem he has been dealing with, there are reasons why he ignores you that might make sense.
WHY IS HE IGNORING ME?
- He’s busy with work or schoolwork
Just because you’ve been dating for a while doesn’t mean your boyfriend has put his whole life on hold.
He still has responsibilities and obligations to fulfill, and that may take up a lot of his time.
So, your boyfriend may be ignoring you because he’s genuinely busy.
He might not even realize that he hasn’t been giving you enough attention.
If he’s in school, he might be studying for exams or doing homework.
If he is working and his job is keeping him occupied or working long hours, he might not have a choice but to ignore his phone until work gets easier.
If he just started a new venture or has had a lot of work to do lately, then there’s a chance that he hasn’t noticed that’s he’s been ignoring you.
However, if he has the time to communicate with his friends and hang out with them, then there have to be other reasons why he is ignoring you.
2. He needs some alone time
Being in a relationship means spending a lot of time together, which can take a toll on people who need a lot of alone time.
If your boyfriend is an introvert, he might need more space than most people do for him to recharge after a long day at work or school.
Sometimes he might even need time away from you to feel better about himself and the relationship.
This is not always a bad thing.
It’s beneficial for couples in a relationship and marriage to have some space to themselves from time to time to recharge and reconnect.
So, he might be ignoring you because he wants to take a breather.
When people feel like they’re being smothered, they often pull away to gain some perspective.
Your bf could be using this tactic as a way of making himself feel better or understanding his feelings.
3. He doesn’t want to argue with you
People tend to hate conflict and would rather avoid it if possible — and sometimes that means ignoring someone who has upset them so they don’t have to face an argument head-on.
This may be especially true of guys; they tend not to deal well with emotions.
If you have been getting into a lot of fights lately, your boyfriend might be ignoring you because he doesn’t want to engage in another argument with you.
Let’s be honest; constant arguments are draining.
4. He’s going through something tough at work or home
Everyone gets stressed out from time to time.
It could be a death in the family or something at work that’s stressing him out.
If this is the case, give him some space for a while.
It may be hard for you to sit back and do nothing but trust me — if you start asking what’s wrong, he’ll probably just feel even more stressed and get annoyed with you for bringing it up.
5. He doesn’t want to talk about something
If your guy is distant because he doesn’t want to talk about something important, then that’s one reason why your boyfriend is ignoring you.
He might not want to tell you the truth about a situation or tell you how he feels about certain things, so he’s better off just avoiding talking with you altogether.
Sometimes, tough conversations need to happen for a relationship to move forward.
If he’s holding back from telling you the truth of things that are happening in his life or how he feels about certain things because he’s uncomfortable doing so, then there’s a problem.
6. He thinks ignoring you will make things better
Men are socialized to believe that showing emotions is weak and that they should “man up.”
Men who aren’t open and expressive with their feelings often try to deal with them by shutting down and going into isolation.
Your man might be trying to show you that he’s okay by acting like nothing is wrong, but it usually means the opposite of what he wants it to mean.
Also, he’s probably heard that playing hard to get is a good way to get what he wants.
So, he’s being unavailable and ignoring your texts in the hopes that playing this game will make you want him even more!
7. He wants to see if you’ll still love him without his attention
This is a common reason a guy will ignore you.
He wants to see if you’ll still love him even when he’s not giving you the attention that you want.
This is often done out of fear — fear that he might lose you if he doesn’t act a certain way or give you what you want.
8. He’s angry or upset with you
There may be an argument between the two of you that has made him angry.
In this case, he may want some time alone to cool down and get over it before talking about the issue so that he can remain calm throughout the discussion and not say anything he will regret later.
Alternatively, he may be ignoring you because he wants to punish you for what you did to upset him.
9. He doesn’t want to be in a relationship anymore
If a guy has decided he’s not interested in being in a relationship with you anymore, chances are he won’t just come out and say it.
Often, when we make up our minds that we’re done with something, we subconsciously stop putting energy into it and start looking for ways out.
And ignoring you is an easy way to push you away without having to have an uncomfortable conversation.
10. You’re too clingy/demanding of his time
You don’t just call, text, and email him all the time; you want to spend all of your free time with him as well.
He feels smothered by you and that might be why he is ignoring you right now.
It is his way of getting some space from you so that he can regain control over his life again instead of feeling like it is spinning out of control.
You should learn to keep busy with other things in your life that don’t involve him.
11. You’re interrupting his life
Have you been trying to get his attention by calling him all the time or stopping by his house unannounced?
If so, then he might not return your calls because he doesn’t want you coming over at random times.
Give him his space and try calling only when you know he’ll have time for you.
Don’t stop by unannounced.
12. He’s afraid of commitment and being hurt
He’s still hurting from his last relationship and doesn’t want to put himself out there again.
Sometimes guys need time to heal after being hurt by an ex-girlfriend or wife before they can open up again.
If this is the case for your boyfriend, he could be ignoring you because he’s still hurting from his last relationship and doesn’t want to put himself out there again, out of fear of being hurt.
13. He’s in love with someone else
He might be ignoring you because he is in love with someone else, or has already fallen for someone else.
He might not know how to communicate his feelings, so he just ignores them instead.
It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t like you at all.
It just means that he likes someone else more than you.
Otherwise, why would he ignore your texts and calls?
It’s hard to deal with someone who is ignoring you, but if you know that they are doing it because they have feelings for another person, then it will take the sting out of it a little bit.
At least you know why it’s happening now.
What do you do if he is ignoring you?
Here are a few more tips on what to do when he’s ignoring you:
Try to find out why your boyfriend is ignoring you
If he doesn’t want to talk about it, tell him that he can talk to you whenever he’s ready.
Give him some space, but make sure he knows that you’re there for him if he needs you
Don’t take his behavior personally and don’t let it get the best of you.
Don’t over-text him or call him.
It’s important that you give him some space and don’t contact him more than he contacts you.
Otherwise, you may come off as clingy and desperate for his attention.
Don’t react negatively
If he is ignoring you, it may be because he is upset with something you did or because he is feeling smothered by your relationship, so reacting angrily or dramatically could push him away even further.
Apologize if you have hurt him.
Give him space and let him work through his issues on his own if that is what he needs right now.
His silence might be a cry for help and if you respond by getting upset with him or calling him names, that could scare him away from the relationship altogether.
There are plenty of reasons your boyfriend might be ignoring you, and not all of them are bad.
However, even if he’s ignoring you for a valid reason, there’s no excuse for ghosting.
Relationships thrive on communication.
Communicating honestly with you will yield better results than ignoring you.
If after giving him space, he still ignores you, it’ll be better to move on and to be miserable.