When you are hurt by someone who you thought cared about you, it can be hard to get over your feelings of betrayal.
This article will help you put things into perspective and decide how to make him regret hurting you and, more importantly, how to move on from the pain he inflicted on your heart.
How to Make Him Regret Hurting You
1. Consider The Source of The Hurt
What exactly did he do to hurt you?
Did he lie to you about his movements, marital status, family, or job?
Was he unfaithful to you?
Was he verbally, emotionally, or physically abusive?
Did he break promises to you, humiliate or belittle you?
How deep is the hurt you are experiencing?
By considering how deep or how long-lasting your hurt is, it will help you put things into perspective.
If his actions were minor and only caused a temporary feeling of pain, for example, then perhaps he does not deserve to be punished severely.
On the other hand, if he caused you deep heartbreak and his actions still haunt your thoughts daily, then it is okay to want to make him regret how he treated you.
2. Are You Still Together or You’ve Broken Up?
If you are still in a relationship with him, how can you make him regret how he treated you?
For example, if it has only been one date and nothing else happened between the two of you yet, then perhaps breaking up would be your best option because there was no real commitment between the both of you.
However, if things were serious or moving quickly at first, but now they’ve taken their course and ended poorly, taking some time apart may help heal your heart before re-entering another relationship.
Another question, do you still love him?
Do you still want to be with him, or do you want to punish him for how he hurt you?
If your love is still strong and true, you’ll need to tread carefully so you don’t do something you will regret later on.
But if your feelings have faded away and you don’t think that getting back together would ever work out in the future, perhaps you could throw caution into the wind….with a little caution, however.
3. Unburden Your Heart To Him
How can you make him regret hurting you if he doesn’t even know how he hurt you?
Sometimes, men can be clueless.
If you want him to know how he hurt you, it is up to you to tell him.
Instead of waiting for him to figure out what he has done wrong or assuming he should know what he has done wrong, explain how his actions have made you feel.
Be firm and clear when you tell him how his behavior has affected you.
If he doesn’t understand how badly he hurt you, waste no more of your precious energy trying in vain to get through to a man who isn’t listening or willing to change in the way that will make things better for you.
You have no power or control over how he’d react to whatever you tell him.
You only have the power to decide how you choose to be treated and how his behavior makes you feel.
So, don’t expect him to understand or act in the way you expect or desire.
The most important thing is that you let out how he hurt you so that your heart can feel the relief of being unburdened.
4. Consider Your Part in The Hurt
How did you contribute to how he treated you?
Sometimes, in our hurts, we don’t consider the part we played in a situation.
It takes some level of maturity to acknowledge how our behavior or words may have contributed to how someone else treated us.
But by looking at how you could’ve handled the situation differently and how your actions might have affected him, it will help unburden your heart of its pain.
If this is true for you in the relationship with him, don’t punish yourself too harshly.
Recognize your part and learn from it, so you don’t repeat the same mistakes.
What were some of your co-dependent behaviors?
Did you always wonder where he was, who he’s with or what he was doing?
Did you always try to please him so he wouldn’t leave?
Did you make all of the sacrifices in your relationship?
If these behaviors sound familiar, it’s time to stop.
These types of co-dependent behaviors are how we get into unhealthy relationships and how we allow others to mistreat us.
They’re not worth repeating for a man who doesn’t value you enough or treat you how you deserve to be treated.
5. Know Your Worth
A part of learning how to make him regret hurting you is recognizing your worth and valuing yourself enough to not tolerate how he is treating you.
If how he treats you doesn’t match your values, don’t stand for it!
You are more than enough and deserve to be treated like the queen that you are by a man who truly understands how lucky he is to have someone as wonderful as yourself in his life.
6. Don’t Suffer for His Behavior
Although how he treated you and how his behavior made you feel is very important, it’s also crucial to remember not to allow yourself to suffer for how another person behaves.
When we live in a world of victimhood, we place our happiness outside of ourselves – only achievable when the other person changes or treats us better.
But, how he treats you is not your responsibility.
You are not responsible for how another person behaves or how it makes you feel – they are accountable for their own behavior.
Don’t suffer over his behavior by letting your self-esteem take a hit because of how he hurt you.
Maybe he lied to you or cheated on you.
It’s okay to feel hurt but don’t ever think it’s because you are not enough or something is wrong with you.
Don’t you ever think you are not worthy of true love either.
Don’t feel shame for his behavior.
You are not the one who misbehaved.
Why should you suffer for it?
7. Stop Doing Whatever You Do To Make Him Happy
If you want to make him regret hurting you, then stop letting him enjoy the benefits he enjoys by being with you.
Stop doing whatever it is that makes him happy because he’s not holding up his end of the relationship by how he treats you.
If he values the benefits he enjoys by being with you, he will definitely regret hurting you when those benefits are no longer available to him.
What benefits do you provide to him by being with you?
Maybe it is how you cook for him, how you always listen to what he has to say, how you make him laugh, or how you give him useful counsel.
Whatever benefits come from being with you that makes him happy, stop providing them.
This might be a hard thing to do if you love him and want things to work out, but how he treats you should outweigh that.
He can’t enjoy the perks of being with you while you ‘re miserable.
8. Focus on Upgrading Yourself
One of the ways to make a man regret hurting you is by becoming the best version of yourself.
If how he treated you was because of who you are, then it’s time to work on upgrading your qualities so that his criticism doesn’t ring true any longer.
It might feel like a daunting task, but it will be worth the effort in the long run when you discover how much more confident and empowered you feel.
Make sure to set your standards high and work on upgrading yourself so he will regret hurting you when he sees how amazing of a woman you have become.
They say success is the best revenge.
Trust me, it’s true.
Make changes for yourself that will make him regret hurting you when he sees how much better off you are without his negative opinion affecting your self-esteem and confidence.
Success is the achievement of set goals.
Set goals and achieve them.
It could be going to school to complete or further your education, getting a better job so you can provide for yourself, starting to workout and getting in shape because how he treated you made you feel insecure about your body image, getting involved in projects that provide you with a sense of purpose and make you feel useful, etc.
Keep in mind, however, that you are doing this for your sake first, and not because you want him to regret how he treated you.
The latter is just a bonus.
So, use your hurt as a catalyst for pursuing and achieving your goals.
If you are no longer together, don’t give him the pleasure of meeting you where you’re at and how he left you.
You would be doing yourself a favor by taking your life back into your control and making him regret how he hurt you because it made you stronger, more confident, and successful in the long run.
Don’t let that go to waste!
9. Focus on Your Happiness
Another way how to make him regret hurting you is by focusing on your happiness and not being obsessed with getting back at him.
I know you think making him regret is by doing something so terrible so he will be the one howling in pain, but that’s not how it works.
You can’t make him regret hurting you by acting like a victim and focusing on getting back at him all the time.
Taking your life back into your own hands and becoming happy and successful is how to make him regret hurting you because people who hurt you without remorse derive satisfaction from your misery.
Denying them that satisfaction is how you make them feel regret for hurting you because they’d realise they have no power over your happiness.
10. Don’t Give Him an Opportunity to Hurt You Again
The best way how to make him regret how he hurt you is by not giving him an opportunity to do it again.
You can do this by making it clear to him what you will tolerate and what you won’t.
If he doesn’t agree with how you feel and how things need to be, then the best way to make him regret hurting you is by moving on and not looking back.
Why would you want to be with someone who has no respect for your feelings and doesn’t even bother trying to understand how much he hurt you?
There is no perfect relationship, and lovers are bound to hurt each other.
However, someone who loves you must show remorse when they hurt you and promise to make things better.
If this isn’t the case, then you are better off without him.
You deserve to be in a relationship where you are respected and genuinely loved.